Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Ask Degang Guo's lines, there will be no pies, steamed stuffed buns and shredded pork with fish flavor in the sky.
Ask Degang Guo's lines, there will be no pies, steamed stuffed buns and shredded pork with fish flavor in the sky.
Y: don't be so coaxed.
Guo: When everyone saw Pig looking at this, didn't they see a person? Yu Qian
Y: it's me.
Guo: A great man in my mind,
Y: alas.
Guo: To tell the truth, I ate a meal, picked up a glass and drank it, and died in the teacher's life.
Tell me I'm dead.
Guo: I've been thinking about it.
Y: huh?
Guo, you have achieved so much. Are there any great people in your family?
Y: where? not have
Guo: Huh?
Y: Ah, descendants of ordinary people.
Guo: What?
Yu: descendants of ordinary people
Guo: Hello, listen, he has a problem with this.
Y: no
Guo: Huh?
Y: no
Guo: Look, there are no seeds in the grass.
Y: huh?
Guo: Don't think about birth.
Y: oh.
Guo: What are the descendants of ordinary people afraid of?
Y: no
Guo: I'm just an ordinary person. You see, we are all ordinary people.
Y: I haven't heard of it. What is wrong with this advantage?
Guo: No, no, I didn't mean that.
Y: A。
Guo: Ordinary people can also produce great people.
Y: that's true.
Guo: Really?
Y: right.
Guo: You are an example.
You are a peanut. Why chestnuts?
Guo: For example.
Y: well, ok.
Guo: You are an example.
Y: I'm chestnut.
Guo: I am another example.
Y: two chestnuts?
Guo: Let me tell you something. Look at you. Are you successful?
Y: A。
Guo: You have become a very good actor, haven't you?
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: I am also in my industry, and I have this outstanding embodiment.
Y: wow.
Guo: I can do these, too. Anyway, I'm great, right (shaking my body)
How did you get lice? Really? What about you?
Guo: Free and natural, no shelf,
Y: Shelf, why aren't you from this industry?
Guo: Me, hehehe. ...
Why are you giggling?
Guo: You said the child was ridiculous.
Y: What do you do?
Guo: Look, other people's professional characteristics are like cross talk.
Y: why?
Guo: Alas, you are so stupid.
Y: How can it be two?
Guo: Right, right.
Y: cute.
Guo: I took a path.
Y: There is none in this place.
Guo: Hmm.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: Because I am a scientist (stretching my arm).
Y: Do you want to fly?
Guo: Where can we argue?
Y: Why are you a scientist always wandering around?
Guo: Excuse me.
Y: What are you embarrassed about?
Guo: Sorry.
Y: You said you were a scientist. Who do you deserve?
Guo: Everyone is worth it.
Y: But what do you do?
Guo: I regard it as a scientist, not as a purchase.
Y: what's that?
Guo: Xue (Xiao)
Yu: study.
Guo: You can also say that, you know?
Y: that's it.
Guo: I learned this. Stuffed cakes fall from the sky for no reason.
Y: there is no such thing.
Guo: Huh? Jiaozi cake, rice, egg and tomato soup, shredded pepper and potatoes, and mouthwash with toothpicks.
Y: What you really want is a full life.
Guo: Not that.
Y: there is no such thing.
Guo: It all depends on study.
Yes
Guo: I am a gifted child.
Y: wow.
Guo: I went to kindergarten at the age of three.
Y: huh?
Guo: Do you know anything about preschool?
Y: The one before school.
Guo: Yes! Yes, smart kids go there.
Y: right.
Guo: As far as I'm concerned, I like kindergarten best.
Y: why?
Guo: jiaozi with minced meat and millet porridge.
Y: eat?
Guo: For three days, I advised him not to go.
Y: why?
Guo: Too many.
Y: mainly to eat.
Guo: The children all went home hungry.
Y: Are they all for people?
Guo: I can throw up all over the classroom.
Y: get up.
Guo: I don't care about this. It's like self-study.
Y: How did you learn it?
Guo: I am self-taught and some have studied abroad.
Y: Go abroad directly?
Guo: Ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Y: what's the matter Why do you always have this?
Guo: Go abroad! Studying abroad. Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe
Y: where to?
Guo: Do you care?
Y: I can't chat.
Guo: I didn't slip away. You are ashamed to ask this question.
Y: Didn't you always feel ashamed when you came up?
Guo: I will go to England, Maru and Wang, hehehe.
Y: I didn't hear you clearly. Hey, where is it?
Guo: Why didn't you hear clearly?
Y: besides.
Guo: Say it again.
Y: right.
Guo: Going abroad, huh?
Y: where?
Guo: In Great Britain and Northern Ireland, um, and Morocco, right? The United States, and ...
Y: Your time is different from that just now. Let's do it again.
Guo: What? !
You can tell me one more thing.
Guo: You, encourage me.
Y: Why should I encourage you?
Guo: This is really encouraging. I am a democratic kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, and there may be no Morocco, the United States and North Korea.
Y: The country names are all vague. Where are they?
Guo: You hate it. You continue to walk south on the south coast of the Pacific Ocean.
Y: so south?
Guo: Don't go too far south. Further south is Gu 'an.
Y: How about going to the East?
Guo: Langfang
Y: to the west?
Guo: Fangshan
Y: north?
Guo: Yuquanying
Y: Your place.
Guo: Yes.
Y: Daxing!
Guo: Look at you, you are dying.
Y: Why do you want to die? Why are you doing this?
Guo: There is no humanity at all. This man.
Y: Who doesn't look like who?
Guo: Not a person at all (Fan)
Y: Your fan is cold.
Guo: Here I am. I went to the Academy of Sciences and was killed, you know?
Y: What is this place?
Guo: Why are you so disrespectful to our profession?
Y: You mean that place?
Guo: I came to our place. You said it was Daxing, Daxing District.
Y: A。
Guo: I said Daxing County, right?
Yes
Guo: We are not. We are. Bring it here, you know?
Y: Tell me about it.
Guo: Great Britain doesn't know where it is either.
Y: You all have them.
Guo: Mississippi, me, me, me, saxophone.
Y: saxophone?
Guo: Saskatchewan, Saskatchewan, saxophone. Some people say that Saskatchewan, referred to as Texas, is a special skill in picking chickens.
Y: no
Guo: Hey.
Y: You said this Texas is Shandong.
Guo: I don't care about this. I don't care about that
Y: you ...
Guo: We are really near Guazhou, where watermelons are the sweetest.
Y: panggezhuang, you said this.
Guo: Pan melon porridge.
Y: Where is Pangu Island?
Guo: Look carefully.
Y: A。
(Many people at the bottom say "like")
Guo: Look at these two people. Look at them. Well, as long as you look at that scholar, you will hate him.
Y: I hate selling watermelons. What?
Guo: Shit, I'm a, I'm a sea returnee.
(Many people say "like" at the bottom)
Guo: What did you hear from our relatives? You see
Y: what's the matter
Guo: That's right.
Y: Is that right?
Guo: a.
Y: there is no cover.
Guo: There is a difference between you and you who drink fresh water.
Y: Don't say that, returnee.
Guo: Yes, ah, look, my classmate just arrived.
Y: It has nothing to do with study.
Guo: We chatted there, and we spoke foreign languages.
Y: you?
Guo: Didn't you hear a foreign language?
Y: say it?
Guo: What do you think? A foreign word. Hello? Can I help you? Yao Xi. This Tashi Dre, Bagyaru, oh, thank you very much.
Y: I'm confused
Guo: I live in the United Nations guest house, and I talk to them in every country.
Y: You just squat there.
Guo: Scholar, are you studying a foreign language?
Y: Really learn to pretend?
Guo: I can't learn this. Half of your brain is wet and half of your face is mushy.
Why are you judging me?
Guo: Do you know? I, after I finished my studies that year, I thought, after I was released, I said
Y: let it out?
Guo: Let it go when you are full.
Y: Have you studied enough? You were locked up after your sentence was released, weren't you?
Guo: Full of learning, full of learning, full of learning.
Yu: Graduated from school.
Guo: Full of knowledge, yes, killing and letting go. None of us were killed. None of us were killed.
Yes
Guo: It's all out. How many countries look for me and stay with me.
Yes
Guo: Germany, Germany wants to see me.
Y: Who is looking for you in Germany?
Guo: Minister Sun of the German Aerospace Department asked for me.
Y: Germany has Minister Sun?
Guo: Minister Sun asked for me, huh?
Y: oh.
Guo: Stay, stay, it didn't do anything, did it? Where loess is not buried, right? Do it here and stay (Shandong accent). I don't want you to do this. Hurry up and play Go.
Y: Playing Go?
Guo: Hit, hit, hit, hit. Go means to go and play.
Y: Why do you use the translator to scold the street?
Guo: You don't know this.
Y: I don't understand.
Guo: Hey, let's play Go. Americans are looking for me.
Y: A。
Guo: America, the secretary of American Shengli Electric Company, wants to see me.
Y: What's your name?
Guo: Sister Liu asked me, "Stay, stay, where?" Where loess is not buried? ""Go, go, come on, play Go. "
Y: Let's play another one.
Guo: Here we go again, the Soviet Union. Wow, the Soviet Union.
Y: Is there a Soviet Union? collapse
Guo: Huh? Right?
Yu: It disintegrated.
Guo: I don't care where it is. I care about this.
Y: ah,
Guo: Find me "dull, dull, what are you doing?" Where loess is not buried? ""Go, go, play Go, Mary plays Go, "
Y: Mary's sounds like something that can laugh, not like a foreigner.
Guo: Bah, under my justice, imperialism ran away with its tail between its legs. A crutch, a urinal and a lunch box (singing) show that this scientist is patriotic.
Y: You are really busy.
Guo: I'm back.
Oh, dear.
Guo: I am in high spirits. I will go to Yangzhou in March.
Y: waist flower?
Guo: Taomi.
Y: what?
Guo: Tang poetry?
Yu: waist flowers, fireworks
Guo: Yes, Yanhua Lane will go to Yangzhou in March. Why are you so angry?
Y: Then let's call fireworks to Yangzhou in March.
Guo: Ah, by the way, fireworks will go to Yaozhou in March.
You can't leave anywhere, can you?
Guo: Yangzhou, how about going down to Yangzhou?
Y: right.
Guo: Oh, I was a child when I left. I left when I was eating millet porridge, and now I am mature.
Yes
Guo: To hone my current transsexuality.
Y: Sex change without surgery?
Guo: Change your personality.
Y: make it clear.
Guo: Change my personality. I support my motherland. Anyway, go ahead, go ahead.
Y: What, just take the oath?
Guo: Work hard.
Y: do it.
Guo: Study hard and make progress every day.
Y: Still studying?
Guo: Work hard and finish my "Go" quickly.
Y: Nobody stopped you.
Guo: I am very busy every day.
Y: What are you up to?
Guo: I study science in the office.
Y: You still have an office.
Guo: Big office.
Y: wow.
Guo: Wow, this office is really big. It's amazing.
Y: how old are you?
K: 40 square meters.
Y: You've never seen a big one. A big office is 40 square meters?
K: A room of k:40 square meters.
Y: Oh, how many rooms?
K: Just one room.
Y: Is it still 40 square meters?
Guo: I beat 400 brothers.
Y: What does that matter?
Guo: Change the light bulb, wow, change the light bulb.
Y: You need to change the light bulb.
Guo: Did you see it? Big desk, two meters long and one meter wide.
Y: so big?
Guo: Black background and white border. It turned out that there was a net in the middle of the room that I took down.
Y: You use a ping-pong box as a desk?
Guo: magnificent. You can take a nap when you are tired.
Y: what's this?
Guo: Anyway, I am willing to return the pencil, ballpoint pen, pencil sharpener and draft paper. It's all here. I'm with Mazar.
Y: Mazar-e? Don't sit in the chair.
Guo: This is my pen container. There is a pen container in the corner. It is more than two meters high. Wow, put the pen in.
Y: How can you hold a two-meter-high pen container?
Guo: I forgot, I brought my fortune teller.
Yu: Da Gua
Guo: Alas, there is my big telephone desk by the window.
Y: big telephone desk.
Guo: There is a telephone on the desk with a hole in it.
Y: find a public phone.
Guo: Here comes the man who is discussing science.
Y: Is it necessary?
K: Contact me. I won't talk to him. I just ignored him.
Y: no money.
K: There is a meter.
Y: Well, it's still a public phone.
Guo: I have my electric mattress here.
Y: It's called bed, you know? Electric mattress table
Guo: Scientific research.
Y: studying in bed?
Guo: There is a portrait of a scientist hanging on the wall.
Y: A。
Guo: Marx, Engels, Lenin, Li Shizhen, Harry Potter and an old man with glasses.
Y: what's this?
Guo: Uncle KFC.
Y: whoever is caught will post.
Guo: This is the periodic table of elements, aoeiuübpmfdtnl.
Y: Is this called the periodic table of elements?
Guo: this is the eye chart, the eye chart, not e, e, it's all here. You can't go wrong. It's up, down, left and right.
Y: What does that matter?
Guo: It's on my eye patch.
Y: just watch?
Guo: Hey! Clean up the house and engage in scientific research.
Y: oh.
Guo: It's getting warmer. Let's return the stove first.
Y: Why borrow the stove?
Guo: Is it cold? It's not worth buying a stove and resting for nine months a year.
Y: You are really good at calculating.
Guo: No, only three months. Used up.
Y: that's right.
Guo: There is a problem left over from history.
Y: what?
Guo: There is a big hole in the glass.
Y: The one with the chimney.
Guo: I'll get a big telescope.
Y: why?
Guo: I think it's right to take a bath.
Y: You are too lazy here.
Guo: It is the responsibility of every scientist to maintain social order (raise your hand).
Y: What kind of security have you maintained?
Guo: The couple took a bath.
Y: You can't understand this.
Guo: Shit, nobody here gets married. This thing?
Y: What do you expect?
Guo: Have a rest. What if you still have faith?
Y: stop looking forward to it.
Guo: I began to study.
Yu: Research.
Guo: Study my science topic.
Y: what?
Guo: I benefit the people.
Y: oh.
Guo: I have benefited.
Where are you? You said to benefit here.
Guo: Benefit.
Y: how to benefit?
Guo: I will. I study Newton.
Y: Newton?
Guo: Newton, how is beef stewed?
Y: still eating.
Guo: It's all rotten, you know?
Y: The tradition of old age has not been forgotten.
Guo: Shit, that's stuffing. I have a whole piece.
Y: what? Newton is beef stew.
Guo: Anyway, anything will do. Anyway, any meat will do. I study civil science and technology.
Y: What about civilian use?
Guo: It's no use learning anything else. Is it useful to study nuclear weapons?
Y: it's no use
Guo: People are as big as small nuclear weapons (gestures)
Y: so big?
Guo: Make a string, ah, connect it, stir it and crack it.
Y: It's called a nuclear weapon. What's it called?
Guo: Alas, it's really boring.
Y: What do you study?
Guo: It is necessary to study ordinary people.
Y: what's this?
Guo: Studying the life closest to ordinary people.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: Studying plants.
Y: What?
Guo: Study a dish.
Y: Is there anything else to study about food?
Guo: I make steamed bread and cabbage.
Y: Chinese cabbage?
Guo: Four Chinese cabbages per foot.
Y: wow.
Guo: Spinach, spinach, 12 meter of spinach, at least half a ton each.
Y: oh.
Guo: When you go home, you pat two cucumbers to eat, er, cook a big eggplant to eat, and stew a stool radish for you.
Y: You can't say this together. Why is it so disgusting?
Guo: Radish, mountain red, radish?
Y: Another big word.
Guo: Sister-in-law is afraid you won't have enough to eat.
Y: I stopped eating when I was older.
Guo: Is it fun to show it?
What do you want?
Guo: Learn civil high technology.
Y: studying, too.
Guo: benefit the people (raise your hand)
Y: no
Guo: Huh?
Y: ok.
Guo: Hmm.
Y: put it here.
Guo: Much better. Study that, study that rain suit.
Y: A rain suit?
Guo: Nano-materials, and then how to do it? It's over. This is a suit. It's okay to wear it when it rains, and there is a raincoat in it.
Nonsense, why don't you wear a raincoat?
Guo: Like lesbians, big pointed leather shoes.
Y: what's the use?
Guo: Big pointed leather shoes to prevent perverts.
Y: pointed leather shoes
Guo: Drink, big pointed leather shoes. I tried. I can nail the bird to the tree with my feet.
Y: Used in hidden weapons.
Guo: Hey, when the girl put on her clothes, the hooligans were scared away.
Y: that's true.
Guo: I have tried.
Y: How did you try?
Guo: When you get dressed and go downstairs, the big glass in front of the hotel will be broken.
Y: alas!
Guo: How many security guards came? They all turned pale with fear. "What can I do for you, sir?" "It's okay." "Oh, it's all right. Lose the glass. "
Y: Don't you need company?
Guo: Civil high technology.
Y: How high-tech is it?
Guo: benefit the people! (Stretch your arms)
Y: stop shouting. Is there anything practical?
Guo: Yes, steamed bread steamer.
Y: Steamer.
Guo: Housewife, how tired is it to steam with you every day?
Y: A。
Guo: I am a fully automatic high-tech steamed bread processing machine.
Y: how about it?
Guo: Absolutely different.
Y: why?
Guo: There are two circles.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: Pick up an iron bar. There's a seat on it and a handle on the head, you know? With the chain, you can run, you know?
Y: Isn't this a bike?
Guo: Yes,
Y: What does this steamed bread have to do with it?
Guo: Ride this to buy steamed bread.
Y: I asked you to study this. What a mess?
Guo: That's it. You must study hard.
Y: study hard, you didn't learn this.
Guo: People, Li, study this every day, open the telescope and relax.
Y: here we go again. Do you regard this as leisure?
Guo: I love cleanliness. I love cleanliness too much. Take a break. I have no relatives. Turn on the TV.
Y: watch TV.
Guo: Change the channel, dadada dadada.
Y: it's all clicked in, and my arm is broken.
Guo: Twenty-one inches, big black and white.
Y: when?
Guo: Huh?
Y: 2 1 inch black and white
Guo: Look at this antenna, huh? Hmm? Hmm? Look, I'm going to touch it. Very clear. When I let go, bang, huh? Come with me, will you? Buy a piece of glass and tie it later.
What do you mean?
Guo: Benefit, I benefit the people! (Stretch your arms)
Y: Don't shout. If you have something to say, don't put it on the chamber.
Guo: I watch the news.
Y: watch the news.
Guo: Speaking of Japanese people, drinking urine to live a long life, what folk custom is this? Ha, this is courage, this is a, an idea.
Y: this is.
Guo: If I, if I pee.
Y: how much is it?
Guo: How about going for a drink?
Y: Selling urine.
Guo: Make drinks.
Y: hi-tech. What kind of drinks?
Guo: A drink that makes me pee.
Y: Where can I drink this?
Guo: Do you live long? You
Y: pee?
Guo: Urine, how good is this? All natural, no preservatives, okay? How good is this? Some people get angry. It can be mixed with water.
Y: Oh, please don't, it's too dirty.
Guo: The urine is yellow. Let's call it lemon.
Y: You can't buy any other colors.
Guo: Not bad, but once you set foot on white water.
Y: white.
Guo: Who will buy it if you have no taste?
Y: what?
Guo: Looking for diabetes.
Yu: Diabetic patients.
Guo: My uncle has diabetes. He cried and went to the hospital and asked for more than four thousand yuan.
Y: drink! very
Guo: Take a piss in the sun and put a stick to pick up a big lollipop.
Y: it's too dirty.
Guo: apples, apple-flavored,
Oh, dear.
Guo: I went to him with a pot. Hey, you are tired. Give me a pot for scientific research.
Y: What kind of scientific research?
Guo: Go back after urinating, and it will be over.
Y: hey.
K: Put it in the bottle.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: Pick up a pipe and put it there. It clicks and clicks.
Y: why is that?
Guo: Soda, come on.
Y: Is it this kind of anger?
Guo: Cover it and put it in the refrigerator. Wait until it gets cold. Meanwhile, take a telescope and look at the swimmers.
Y: nothing else.
Guo: This man has left. Where did he go?
Y: A。
Guo: I lost this man.
Y: I can't find it.
Guo: What about my spare time? I have been waiting for an hour.
Y: A。
Guo: Urine, cold and disorder.
Y: You have to remove the mouth under the needle.
Guo: Oh, my stomach hurts.
Y: nonsense.
Guo: What a turning point!
Y: no
Guo: Get rid of going to the toilet quickly.
Y: get out. Is there no toilet in your room?
Guo: Where is the toilet in the bungalow?
Y: What kind of scientist?
Guo: Run, run, run to the toilet, run to the toilet.
Y: A。
Guo: The toilet attendant stopped me, "Don't move, don't let me in, go, go outside". I hate it.
Y: pay the money.
Guo: This is called bullying and being afraid of hard work. The scholar can kill the scholar or humiliate the scholar, but now he has to relieve himself.
Y: there is no such thing.
Guo: There is a saying.
Y: That's not what I said.
Guo: If you don't let me in, just-just leave this little light on and wait for me.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: Turn around and run.
Y: mm-hmm
Guo: There is a toilet over there. Run forward. A group of children's kindergartens are playing games with it on the roadside. Ah, then shut up when singing "la la la la la"! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Y: you can't force it.
Guo: My place is broken. Shut up and run. There is a restaurant in front. There must be a toilet in the restaurant.
Y: there.
Guo: Go up the steps and bump into the door.
Y: A。
Guo: I haven't heard the word "pull" written in 14 on the door handle.
Yes
Guo: I listened to him this time and wore a pair of pants.
Y: A thousands of miles away.
Guo: The door opened and the waiter came. "What would you like to eat, sir?" "What to eat this? Go home and change a pair of pants. "
Y: let's go.
Guo: Turn around and come out without going home.
Y: huh?
Guo: I'll run to the public toilet first and have a fight with the doorman.
Yu: settle accounts
Guo: Would I be so embarrassed without him?
Y: Hit people.
Guo: Why don't you let me in? !
Y: A。
Guo: You won't let me in. I'm going to buy a pair of pants now. He and I had a good time. "I deserve it. This is called karma. "
Y: what's the matter
Guo: Who told you to watch me take a bath?
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