Super nonsense funny copywriting

1. When I was a child, I secretly vowed that I would be a brilliant man of 1 in the future. After years of hard work, I finally achieved 1.5. I am ... I am awesome now.

I am only in my twenties. Love can be late, but delivery can't be late at all.

Husband: "Wife, since I got married, my eyesight has gone wrong!" " "Wife:" What symptoms? "Husband:" I can't see the money! "

4. I often see eating goods! Tell me about my son! When my son was eating, I repeatedly said, Son, look up and catch your breath!

Seeing that everyone's boyfriends are getting uglier and uglier, I know that everyone is serious and really getting married.

6. I caught a cold, and bought a good quality thermos in order to let myself drink more hot water. I went early in the morning, burned my mouth eight times and didn't drink a mouthful of water.

7. The most beautiful thing in the world is eating meat. Never betray, never cheat, eat a catty, grow a catty, and always treat each other sincerely.

8. Pain is the crutch of life, which makes the strong stronger and the weak weaker.

9. People can't judge whether they are rich or not by their appearance. When we pass each other in the street, you will never think that I am a luxurious yellow diamond.

10. "When someone praises you for your good looks, how do you keep a low profile?" "What? Speak louder, I can't hear you! "

1 1. Later, I finally understood in tears that some people can't lose weight once they get fat.

12. Husband: Wife, it's really not easy for both of them to work in the countryside. Don't worry, as long as I have a bite to eat. Let you have a sip of urine to drink! Wife: Honey, I'm relieved to have you. As long as you can eat, I will die of thirst!

13. I can resist everything except temptation.

14. Don't see others joking about the profession of moving bricks, you should also join in the input. Are you sure you earn more than moving bricks?

15. I took a fancy to a pair of shoes in the shopping mall and wanted to pick them up and have a look. As a result, the salesman said coldly, 39000 yuan, don't touch it if you don't buy it! I was so angry that I let her write the invoice! Then ask him where to pay the money, get the ticket, go shopping, go out of the mall gate, no money! I am also very headstrong.

16. Buying a computer without broadband is like having wine and meat, and becoming a monk before eating.

17. Just now, a beautiful girl was in front of me. We looked at each other for a long time, and no one broke the peace. I didn't put down the mirror until my hands were tired.

18. It is said that children are pearls left behind, and mothers are angels sent by God to protect children. And I am the top that God dropped, and my mother likes to pull the top.

19. Every time the induction faucet doesn't work, I feel like begging.

20. The teacher asked: Who can translate "A sparrow knows the ambition of a swan" into modern Chinese? "Hall, you don't understand my brother's world. ...

2 1. Women must be kind to themselves. Once you are exhausted, other women will spend your money, live in your room, sleep with your husband and beat your baby.

22. Some men are like Bluetooth. As soon as you leave, look for other equipment.

23. I bought a bottle of iced black tea and won six bottles in a row. Do you think this is a good thing? How can I get six bottles of iced black tea without a lid?

24. Many things in life will eventually get better with time. Like many people who were just fat, they became fat after a long time.