What jokes can make you laugh all your life?

"No way, take advantage of my mother and don't marry me." Sister Yuling couldn't help laughing when she remembered this story:

1In the mid-1950s, my eldest sister Liu Yuling was 23 years old. Yuling's name is beautiful and can't be complimented. She has thin triangular eyes, a big nose, thin lips and a big fork embedded in a cake face in Zhang greatly. The only recommendation is fair skin and tender meat.

Big sister is ugly, but confident and cheerful. Love talking, laughing, lively, singing and dancing. She is an active member of the company and a propaganda committee member of the Communist Youth League branch.

Gao Xiao was 24 years old, heavy-eyed, 1.76 meters tall and handsome, and worked as a secretary in the company office. He is the idol of the girls in the company.

At that time, there were many group activities, and there were parties or dances every weekend night.

At every party, Sister Yuling would take the stage to sing excerpts, and I was betrothed to the Zhao family at an early age. Sister Yuling can sing this passage. When Dagong Duck opens his mouth, it destroys the image of Liu Qiaoer, but it can bring fun to everyone. Some people like to watch Yuling's sister's ugly performance, just like watching a circus clown show.

Later, everyone was always tired of listening to this paragraph. As soon as the announcer announced the curtain call, people began to go to the toilet under the stage. As soon as Sister Yuling started to sing, the audience who went to the toilet and went out to smoke all retreated by half. However, no matter how many people are in the audience, Sister Yuling is full of charm, and she will be happy if she sings well. Whether you listen or not will not affect my happiness. Sister Yuling's good attitude and self-confidence are unparalleled.

Gao Xiao holds a dance in the company. He is the prince at the dance. The girls all want to dance with Gao Xiao. But I don't know when it started. Sister Yuling took Gao Xiao away. If you insist on Gao Xiao, don't give up. Gao Xiao invited other girls to dance. Sister Yuling pouted and shook her face. The whole girl is very uncomfortable. They are afraid to dance slowly with Gao Xiao.

In private, Yuling's elder sister and younger sisters keep watch. I have an appointment with Gao. The girls don't believe it. Sister Yuling is also anxious, thinking about how to quickly adjust the height. Sleep, don't let other girls grab the height.

One Saturday afternoon, Sister Yuling went to the office to find Gao Xiao, quietly handed Gao Xiao a movie ticket and whispered to Gao Xiao: I'll invite you to the movies tonight, and I have something good to tell you.

Xiao Gaoer thought how good this was. Maybe he wanted to introduce me to someone, so he went to the cinema.

Sister Yuling didn't say anything nice when she watched the movie. When the movie was over, Sister Yuling took Gao Xiao for a walk and told you some good things.

Walking, I came to the river. At night, the river is the boundary of lovers. Couples of men and women are leaning on the railing by the river, whispering, full of love and quite infectious.

Gao Xiao said, Do you have anything to say?

Sister Yuling suddenly threw herself into Gao Xiao's arms, hugged Gao Xiao tightly and said, I'm in love with you.

It came so suddenly that Gao Xiao was stunned. At this moment, Sister Yuling looked up from Gao Xiao's arms, looked at Gao Xiao and said, You are handsome and talented, and I like you. He stood on tiptoe and kissed Gao Xiao on the cheek.

As high as an electric shock, I felt a tingle all over. Looking at elder sister Yuling's white face in the moonlight, it seems that it is not too ugly, and she involuntarily hugged her shoulder.

After a long time, there will be no contradiction. Gao Xiao can't stand the strength of Yuling's sister. Besides, Gao Xiao doesn't like Yuling's sister at all. He was emotional by the river that night and didn't control himself. He regretted it. Slowly, he ignored Yuling's sister. Sister Yuling urged him to get married. Gao Xiao is always dragging around, and Sister Yuling is starting to think tricks again.

Another afternoon, Sister Yuling sent a movie ticket to Gao Xiao. Gao Xiao said she had something to do in the evening. Sister Yuling took the opportunity to explode: Gao Xiao, what do you mean? We have been dating for a long time. You want to dump me and take advantage of my mother. There is no way. Let's talk to the manager.

As he spoke, he pulled up his arm and shrank back in fear. When Sister Yuling made this noise, the office staff and the staff of the adjacent departments came to watch. I don't know how much this high cost Yuling's sister, so I persuaded her for a long time before giving up and promised to accompany her to the movies to end the farce.

While watching the movie, Sister Yuling whispered to Gao Xiao: I really like you, so you can't run. You are young and promising, and you have a bright future. Be nice to me.

Yes, gentleness is a threat. If you don't marry me, I will ruin your future, so that Sister Yuling can have this strategy.

In this way, Gao Xiao reluctantly married his sister Yuling. On their wedding night, Sister Yuling said to Gao Xiao, Gao Xiao, I know you don't want to marry me, but I like you. If I like you, I will get you. If I get you, I will be good to you. If you treat me badly, I will find a way to punish you. Do you believe it or not?

When she said this, Sister Yuling was laughing. Gao Xiao nodded helplessly, and Yuling's sister held Gao Xiao tightly.

After marriage, Sister Yuling treated Gao Xiao like an emperor. Sister Yuling chose clothes for him to eat more. At home, Gao Xiao is not allowed to eat half a snack.

Gao Xiao also lived up to expectations and finally became the director of the company's office.

Gao Xiao became Gao, Yuling's sister became Gao's sister, then Gao's aunt, and finally Gao's grandmother.

In this life, Lao Gao has been in the hands of Aunt Gao. If a woman is confident, nothing is impossible.

Thanks to the platform

What makes me laugh the longest is one thing. One year in Taiyuan. We just moved to a new website, where we were working. There is a well over there, which may not be used for a long time. We went to get some water and cooked some rice that day, and several of us felt sick after eating. One of them is an old master. I feel like farting in my stomach I want to fart. Right there. He said he just wanted to fart. We said you can play if you want. As a result, he put a hard one, which is not good. It was pulled into the crotch at once and flowed down the two trouser legs, which made our stomachs ache with laughter. It always makes me laugh when I think about it.

A friend of mine is a policeman. One day, their police caught a thief, and everyone took turns interrogating him to explain what he had stolen. Where things are hidden. But the sly thief just found various reasons to say that he was not at the scene. Finally, my buddy had no choice but to let the thief go. When I was about to go out, my buddy sent the thief to the door, then pointed to the sky and went back to the house. In less than five minutes, the thief came back with a sallow face and said, you are really a detective. My things are always on the ceiling of the house. From then on, everyone admired my friend. He was a detective. How do you know her things are hidden in it? My buddy said angrily that it was raining, so I reminded him. The rain belt pointed at the umbrella, and he thought about it and confessed. Hearing this, everyone laughed.

One more thing, one day, we arrested two people in the forest detention center. The policeman asked the two men how did you get in? These two men said that we were caught after being cut in a fight. The police said it was wrong. Bargaining bars can't arrest you and detain you, the guy said. We cut down this big tree. Everyone laughed at that time.

Whether you laugh or not depends on everyone's smile. People who find it funny don't necessarily find it funny. Share a joke that I find particularly funny, and give a compliment if you like it.

1, in winter, the robber put a knife on the hostage's neck, and the hostage shouted: cool, cool, cool! The whole bank has internal injuries.

2. Describe the feeling during the earthquake: I felt the bed shaking, and I thought my husband was asleep. hahaha

The doctor asked: How did you break your hand?

"There is sand in my shoes, so I shake my shoes with a telephone pole. An Sb thought I was electrocuted and gave me two sticks when I came up. "

4. I went to have an abortion with my girlfriend today. She told me weakly in bed, honey, I don't want it if it's not your child. What a good girlfriend China is. ...

5. I am a nurse. Today, I went on a blind date. I circumcised him. It was embarrassing.

6. A colleague was on a business trip, got on the train and found someone else sitting in the seat. He took the ticket and deliberately asked the person sitting there, saying, big brother, I can't read. Please help me to see where my ticket is ... which eldest brother took a look and said, brother, you can stand here or there. ...

7. Last night, some friends took me out for a midnight snack. I said I didn't want to see them abuse dogs. Then they said that there were four friends who didn't have to be afraid, so I went. I ended up having a midnight snack with three couples.

A woman caught her right index finger while riding a bus. She wants to sue and claim 6.5438+0 million from the car company. The lawyer said to her, "I'm afraid a finger can't claim that much." The woman growled, "My fingers are used to command my husband."

When I am free, I usually collect some interesting jokes. Just send a few jokes that I think are funny today. I look at it and laugh at it once.

Joke 1: Female: Baby, do you know where my curling iron is? M: What's great about it is that it can make you look better! Woman:?

Joke 2: The teacher left homework before school, and Xiaoming didn't listen carefully. Later, he went home to call his deskmate, who told him that his homework was to write a composition entitled "If I were a spider". So the next day, Xiao Ming read his composition "If I were a pig" in front of the whole class.

Joke 3: One day, the father asked his son: Son, who do you want to marry in the future? Son: I want to marry my grandmother. Dad: Nonsense, how can you marry my mother! ? Son: You can marry my mother. Why can't I marry your mother?

Joke 4: I remember when I was a child, my dad took me to ride a bike and my foot got stuck in the wheel. My dad felt unable to pedal, so he stood up and pedal.

Joke 5: The little goldfish asked the big goldfish: Why do people say that our goldfish's memory is only seven seconds? Big goldfish: What? Little goldfish: What did you say? Big goldfish: What's the matter?

Joke 6: In the past, the grain transportation in a county was very chaotic. A river official named Zhuan Xu came up with an idea. All people involved in grain transportation must get a pass in the county. When most people get the cards, some people who don't know what's going on ask. An old farmer sighed and said, He Guan, whose surname is Zhuan, got a certificate in this county.

Xiaoming failed in the exam. Chinese 65,438+00, Math 5. He nervously took the roll of paper to his father for signature. Dad took the roll of paper and was silent for a long time with a dignified expression. At last he said, "Son, are you a little biased?"

The life I live is a joke, and it's enough to laugh all my life. There is no time to laugh at other people's jokes.

Knowing that the other person doesn't love himself, he still asks for nothing in return and is willing to trust a loyal wife. As a result, I hurt myself and my loved ones! This is a joke that I will never forget.

Others believe in love.