Let’s make a joke. It’s funny, but don’t make it cold.

1. Wife: "Some people say that a person is prone to do stupid things in the hazy moonlight. Do you think that makes sense?" Husband: "That's right, I remember, I was in a I propose to you on a dim moonlit night."

2. One day, the professor asked two students about their ideals.

The first student said, "I will be a multimillionaire in the future." Another student said, "I will be a movie star and give concerts in the future."

The professor heard He said meaningfully, "Money and fame and fortune are external things, and only learning is the most noble."

A student said disapprovingly, "If everyone is indifferent to fame and fortune and is content to be ordinary, Human society will not progress."

At this time, the little god Lis passed by and interjected, "Yes, if people abandon their cars and houses, walk on their legs, and live in a dark and humid environment. Here, humans are still cavemen.”

3. A white woman has always had a crush on a black man, but she never had the courage to confess her love. One day, when the woman was walking on the street, she met the handsome black man, so she approached him and asked politely: "Would you like to have a drink with me?" The black man agreed to her request, and the woman asked her The man was led to his home.

"Put me on the bed." The woman requested.

The black man complied.

"My dear, you can do whatever you want now! You can do whatever you want!" the woman said again.

After hearing this, the black man happily took away the computer and camera.

4. A gentleman found that he had roundworms in his buttocks, so he immediately ran to the doctor.

After arriving at the hospital.

Man: Doctor! There are roundworms in my butt... Please check it for me

The doctor said nothing, took out a jar of strawberry jam, scooped some into the man's butt,

Say: You can go! Come again tomorrow!

After one day, repeat the same action and change the taste to peanuts.

The next day, repeat the same action, changing the flavor to chocolate.

On the third day...

Doctor: Let me take a look,

Suddenly! A roundworm emerged from the man's buttocks and said:

What's the flavor today?

5. A young lion came to a certain zoo and the old lion was in the same cage.

The administrator always gives the young lion a banana every time he comes to feed, while the old lion always gives him a big piece of meat.

The young lion thinks: Maybe I am new here Yes, don't care too much.

Three months later, the situation was still the same. The young lion finally couldn't hold back and asked the administrator: Why do I still only eat bananas after three months here?

The administrator replied: Because you occupy the monkey's vacancy.

6. When I was a sophomore in high school, among my two classmates, A always liked to sleep during class, but B was not a fuel-efficient lamp. One day, A was sleeping well, and B poked him: "The teacher asked you to erase the blackboard." A rubbed his sleepy eyes, stepped forward, grabbed the eraser, and started drying it. The math teacher next to him looked at the blackboard he had just written. It was disappearing, with a blank look. When I stopped drinking, most of it had been removed, and the classroom was full of joy... A and B had to endure a month of wiping the blackboard and spreading it throughout the school.

7. Wife: We will have three children in the future. Right?

Husband: Alas, 2 is enough? Wife: 3!

Husband: No, 2!

Wife: I say 3 Just 3!

Husband: I will have a sterilization after the second child is born!

Wife: OK, I hope you love the third child equally

8. A psychiatrist conducted a psychological test on an elderly patient. The patient is a bachelor.

He first drew a curve and asked: "What does this line remind you of?"

The patient said: "A woman's body 9

The doctor then drew two circles and asked him: "What about this? What does it remind you of?"

The patient said: "A woman's breasts 9

The doctor also drew a star , said: "What about this?"

The patient raised his eyebrows and said sheepishly: "This is a woman's privacy9

The doctor put down his pen, looked at the patient, and said seriously : "According to my judgment, you are probably suffering from female delusion 9

The patient said unhappily: "You are the only one suffering from female delusion! The drawings are full of female patterns 9

9. We all know that girls come here every month and call the ones who come “good friends”, but do you know why we call them such good friends?

Isn't it very expressive when you take it apart? "Women have it every month"!