A funny joke with philosophical connotation?

A smile can save ten years. Smiling more can help our mentality become younger. Laughter is something that can be contagious. People bring happiness to others or themselves through communication methods such as words and actions. Next is "" that I carefully prepared for you, welcome to watch!

***Popular Chapter***

1. The subway is very crowded, and there is a buddy next to me chatting on WeChat , with curious eyes, he must be chatting with his girlfriend. The woman said this: "Dear, I finished the game last night!"... I guess they were discussing the game, but the guy immediately typed in quickly: "I've finished the game a long time ago!"... He hesitated for a while and didn't click send, but I deleted it and re-entered it: "Really, it's so awesome. Can you take me to play with you another day?"

2. I met an old man who brought his grandson to swim in the swimming pool. He talked like thunder. The grandson couldn't swim, so his grandfather would often yell at him: Look at that brother! How beautiful he swims! Look at that uncle! How beautiful he swims!... It hurt his self-esteem so much that he turned away and ignored grandpa. Suddenly grandpa said: Look at that sister! How beautiful she is! Shota turned his head back as fast as lightning.

3. When I enter the university, I will register after completing my military training. My roommates then teased me. Everyone got tattoos of dragons, tigers and leopards, and then each of them smoked a cigarette, making the dormitory full of smoke. I looked a little nervous. One of the roommates tremblingly took out a piece of tin foil, sprinkled some milk powder on it, toasted it a few times with a lighter, and politely brought it to me: "Brother, take a whole mouthful?" Then, I peed my pants...

4. In the physics class, when talking about communication, the physics teacher asked: "What is the earliest communication method?" Some shouted beacon fire, and a voice came from the corner: "Dream Entrustment". Teacher: "Get out of here..."

5. My roommate's cell phone was stolen when he went out today. He chased the thief for more than ten kilometers and finally caught up with the thief. The thief took out a dagger from his waist and yelled: "F***, you picked out a block of mobile phone and you chased me for more than ten kilometers. I will stab you to death with a fucking knife!" The roommate's face was frightened at that time. He turned green and trembled and said: "Brother, you misunderstood. I am chasing you to give you a charger."

6. When I had dinner with my male idol today, I said that a female man like me How should I find a boyfriend? He said: "No way! You are not a tomboy anymore, I think you are cute!" I said: "I am a tomboy! If you don't believe me, why don't you compete with me in arm wrestling!!" Male God said: "Okay, if you lose, you can only say that you are a cute girl." I eagerly said: "Okay!!" Then I won, and he silently packed up the plates and left.

7. I took my three-year-old son for an injection. The nurse teased him and said, has the child gone to kindergarten? Can he sing? Sing a song for auntie!! The baby said, I can’t. I can sing and recite poems. Then recite the poem to your aunt. The baby said: It was noon on the hoeing day, and the nurse worked really hard, holding a small broken needle and giving it all the morning.

8. When I was in junior high school, a classmate went out to play. As soon as he left the hospital, he saw a figure flashing out of the dark alley and yelled: Don’t move! My classmate reacted very quickly and immediately took out a few knives from his trouser pocket. Ten dollars, I said to the guy: I only brought this much, brother, really. The man seemed a little embarrassed, and then said: I am a policeman, checking underage Internet access, and guarding the back door of the Internet cafe here. My classmate was very helpless after hearing this: Living upstairs from an Internet cafe wouldn’t be so scary.

9. Look at the two words "Who" and hum the lyrics. Those who automatically sing "In your ears, say, love me will never change" are ordinary young people; those who sing "Knocking on my window" are literary young people; those who sing "Sending you to my side" are * **Youth; the one who sang "Singing, Warming the Loneliness" is the fighter in ***...

10. I went to the supermarket with my wife to buy groceries at noon today. On the way home, the sun was too bright It was so hot that I started sweating on my forehead. I was sweating like rain. I suddenly asked my wife: "Do you know why I sweat on my forehead?" My wife said: "Hahaha, it's because there is water in my brain." , now they are all discharged.

”

***Classic***

1. Yesterday, the dean confiscated one of my classmates’ mobile phones during evening self-study inspection, and the dean conveniently opened the phone’s address book After checking, he was surprised to see that one of the few contacts had the name "Animal". The director joked in the class, "Oh, there is someone with the name "Animal", and then he pressed the call button in full view. Our director's cell phone rang instantly...

2. My sister only eats vegetarian food at school, but she has gained a lot of weight during the Chinese New Year. My mother wanted to point it out, but she was afraid. To hurt the young girl's self-esteem, she said tactfully: "Have you ever heard the saying, 'A daughter is a caring mother...'" My sister immediately answered: "A caring little cotton-padded jacket!" "But if you continue like this, it will be very difficult for you to do so. It's almost turning into a military coat. ”

3. Don’t go out without washing your hair on this day. You must wash your hair as soon as you go out. Make a reservation one day in advance before going out because you need to wash your hair.

4. If you are walking while If you fart, the speed will be much faster. God's reply: Don't believe him, because of this, I got several speeding tickets this month.

5. There were so many people on the bus today. I heard a woman yelling, "Oh, don't be so crowded, your skirt is wrinkled." Then the elder sister said, "Don't take the bus if it's too crowded." The woman said with a haughty look, "You think I want to take the bus today?" "Limited traffic" A few seconds later, a faint sentence came from not far away: "*** I saw you yesterday"

6. Please be careful, if you meet a young person with hands and feet on the street, but he is begging. People who also claim how miserable they are are mostly liars, because if they were really that miserable, they would have participated in the talent show

7. Recently, I was watching the B station’s version of The Legend of Zhen Huan. What I can't bear is that whenever a woman is carried to the emperor's bed, the message will always be "Your Majesty, your old Beijing chicken rolls are here."

8. "Excuse me, teacher, it's so beautiful." 'How do you say 'Good night~' in English?

9. My boyfriend sent me home. When we were about to say goodbye downstairs, he said silently, "The people living in your community are all good people. I was relieved. I was stunned, and he raised his phone and said, "Five wireless networks were found, and none of them had passwords. . . ”

10. Let me tell you, no matter how thin you are, as long as you have a round face, the first impression you will give others is that you are fat...

* **Selected Article***

1. A little bear was walking at night and suddenly felt a cold. He touched it with his hand and found that his tail was missing, but when he turned around he saw nothing. , so scared that the little bear broke into a cold sweat: "Who is it! Who is it!" At this time, a voice came from the air: "I am a tail-cutting ghost.

2. Because of my work, I was lucky enough to go to the countryside. Interviewed at the Qingshan Sanatorium, visited some patients with mental illness and brought them daily necessities. The dean told me that almost no one comes here usually, and they are all lonely. It made me feel very uncomfortable. Before leaving, I waved vigorously to say goodbye to them. Several nurses and guards were also very reluctant to give up and chased me for several kilometers before catching me back.

3. In the evening on campus, boys and girls sat side by side in the corner, and the girl rubbed her skirt? She said shyly: "Do you know, it is said that 90% of girls like the feeling of forced kissing." , the boy pushed up his glasses, thought for a moment and asked: "Why do the remaining 10% like the wall to be unstable?" Netizen: "The remaining 10% like the wall to be strong."

4. This week, the delivery rooms of major hospitals in Beijing were full. Expectant fathers and expectant mothers asked doctors to help deliver their babies before midnight no matter what.

5. I said to the plastic surgeon: "How much does Takeshi Kaneshiro's look cost?" The doctor looked at my face and said: "It's difficult to have a face like yours. It costs two million, and you have to pay half of the deposit. Surgery a week later." I paid the fee. Watching the news the next day, Takeshi Kaneshiro was disfigured by the underworld.

6. It’s terrible! My friend was pulled by a man who claimed to be her boyfriend on the subway just now! The friend called for help and the man explained that it was a couple quarreling. When the friend saw this, he yelled at the onlookers. : ***! Do you think I look like someone with a boyfriend? Everyone was convinced and my friend was saved.

7. It’s the Ghost Festival~ Let me recommend some good movies to everyone~ "The Ring", "The Grudge", "Hanako the Ghost Doll", "The Pen Fairy", "Little Times" and "Death is Coming" "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" and "A Nightmare on Elm Street"

8. My younger son was scared to death because he was worried about the monster under the bed, so I sat down to comfort him and reassure him. "Xiao Ming, the monster under your bed is gone. It will never bother you again." "Really? Daddy, how can you be sure?" "Of course I am sure, my good son. ,” I said, “Because it was eaten by the clown in the attic.” It seemed to be very effective, and he was silent~

9. I was recording a game in the studio once. In the NPC dialogue, I saw a beautiful girl recording the role of a queen. She said in a standard royal voice: "Do you only know this little skill? Poor human being, you are not worthy of letting me do it. In front of me, you are just an insignificant force." Vibrator." At that time, no one noticed anything was wrong. After a while, the girl came out of the recording studio with a red face and said, "Director, can you do it again? I made a mistake and it was not a vibrator but a flea."

10. At the station, a young couple is waiting for the bus. The man pulled the woman over to kiss him, but the woman was a little embarrassed and ran away. The man was unhappy: "What's wrong? My wife won't let me kiss her anymore!" The woman pouted and said, "So many people are watching! Showing affection in public is something only middle school students can do, okay!" The man nodded. The head is not moving anymore. Looking at their retreating figures, I couldn’t help but sigh: Today’s primary school students are so enlightened.