Homophonic jokes, couplets, crossword puzzles, two-part allegorical sayings

Joke: 1 Lying in the spring (I'm stupid), lying in the plum blossom (I have no education), lying in the sky (I only know how to farm) and lying in Shi Shui with a fish kiss (I want to ask who I am).

Xiao Ming wrote a composition and saw a lot of shit when he went out. I was shocked by a kilo, my mother, my father and my brother. Teacher's comment: It's really big, weighing four pounds.

The teacher spoke to the students before class: The Education Committee will come to the school for inspection tomorrow, and you must wear school uniforms tomorrow. Remember, if something happens, you must write a note. Xiaoming doesn't study hard at ordinary times. He always writes in big white. On this day, he really couldn't go to school because of something, so he wrote a note for his classmates to take to the teacher. The teacher was startled when he saw it, but the note read as follows: "Hello, teacher! I went to my father's unit to see him off in the morning and had to wear mourning clothes to school in the afternoon. " What are you going to study? When such a big accident happened in someone's family, the teacher quickly came to his family on behalf of several class cadres to show concern and pay tribute to grief. I didn't find anything when I went to his house, but later I learned that it was all caused by fake articles. Send finals and bells; Don't use it indiscriminately; Can filial piety and school uniform be equated? ! !

Crossword puzzle: 2 1 10, guess a word, the answer is: Yan.

Four people move a piece of wood and guess a word. The answer is: Jay.

A person, guess a word, the answer is: big.

Everyone has a mouth and a hand under his mouth. Guess a word, and the answer is: take it.

Including one person, guess the answer is: meat.

One person chooses two villains, and the answer is: clip.

A man has a bow around his waist. Guess the answer is: Yi.

Take a bite of the cow's tail and guess a word. The answer is Sue.

Confidently, guess a word, and the answer is: pay.

One big and two small, guess a word and the answer is: Nai.

A bucket of rice, guess a word and the answer is: material.

1 7, guess a word, the answer is: fat.

One plus one, guess a word. The answer is: Wang.

Half, guess a word and the answer is: mortar.

Thirteen o'clock in a word, the difficulty lies in how to order. Guess a word and the answer is: juice.

One hundred MINUS one, guess a word, the answer is: white.

Night after night, guess a word and the answer is: a lot.

A person moves two pieces of soil and guesses a word. The answer is: OK.

Couplet: 2345 6789 Horizontal batch: lack of clothes (1) eat less (10)

Spiders are dense under the eaves and earthworms are full of mud in front of the courtyard.

Two-part allegorical saying: Lord Huang Cheng has grass on his feet, and he is very alarmed.

Hang a key on the wall and meet in public (in town).

Leprosy basks in the sun and the skin becomes stiff.

It is impossible to mix ground beef.

Pickled pickles with pebbles, it is difficult to finish one word (salt).

Hit the enemy when you are hungry, and make trouble when you are hungry.