Jokes about safety (preferably within 100 to 120 words)

Five boys were taught to talk about smoking one by one by the snitch teacher:

The first boy truthfully admitted being beaten; Back to the dormitory, said:

Dude: I want it all, so don't admit it when you want it.

[Scene 1]

Teacher: To be honest, do you smoke?

Boy A: No. ..

Teacher: No? Well, French fries, please.

Boy A naturally stretched out two fingers and took it. ............

[Scene 2]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy b: no.

Teacher: No? Well, French fries, please.

Boy B is holding French fries carefully because he heard about A.

Teacher: Don't you want some ketchup?

B accidentally got too much, and immediately played it with two fingers-

Teacher: No? The posture of playing ash is very skilled. Call your parents ...............

[Scene 3]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy c: no.

Teacher: No? All right, French fries.

Because of the first two examples, the boy C carefully finished the French fries with sweat.

Teacher: Aren't you going to take a root home for your classmates?

Boy C picked up French fries and put them on his ear. ..................

[Scene 4]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy d: No. ..

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

The boy ate the French fries with trepidation and put them in his coat pocket.

The teacher suddenly shouted, here comes the headmaster.

The boy was so busy that he took French fries out of his pocket and threw them on the ground, stomping on them. ......................

[Scene 5]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy: No.

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

The boy just took the French fries,

The teacher said: Don't invite me to dinner.

The boy was so busy that he handed the chips in his hand and then took out a lighter. ................

[Scene 6]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Boy: No.

Teacher: Good. Have a French fries.

The boy ate French fries with trepidation and put them in his upper pocket.

The teacher suddenly shouted, here comes the headmaster.

The boy has sweated his palms and bowed his head and said, hello, headmaster!

Teacher: The headmaster will smell your mouth.

The boy took the French fries out of his pocket: it's safe, it's still there, the fire hasn't lit yet …

[Scene 7]

Teacher: Do you smoke?

Teacher: You really don't smoke? Ok, let's have a French fries.

Boy: It's natural to take away the French fries and eat them clean.

Teacher: That's a good boy. What brand of French fries do you usually like?

Boy: [Get carried away] Greater China. . . . .

Scene n:

Teacher: French fries, please!

Boy: No thanks.

lip print

The headmaster of the home school faces a problem, and the older female students in the school begin to wear lipstick. When they apply lipstick in the bathroom, they will print their lips on the mirror and leave lip prints. He thought of a way to stop the problem before it got out of control. So he called all the girls wearing lipstick and asked them to meet in the bathroom at 2 pm. When the girls arrived at the bathroom at 2 o'clock, they found the headmaster and supervisor already waiting there. The headmaster explained the problem to them and asked the supervisor to clean the bathroom mirror every night. He thinks the girls don't understand the seriousness of the problem, so he wants them to see for themselves how difficult it is to clean the mirror. Then the supervisor began to demonstrate. The warden took out a long-handled brush from the box, dipped it in some water in the nearest toilet, and then went to the mirror to start scrubbing.

Since then, no one has left lip prints.

New safety knowledge

1, a special line you have to know, 1 12.

A few days ago, three nurses accidentally fell into a valley with a depth of150m, and were rescued after being trapped for four days and three nights. In the meantime, they tried to call for help with their mobile phones; But one is broken, one is out of power, and one is not well received.

They also looked for a better reception place, but they all failed. If these three nurses know the hotline 1 1 2 at ordinary times, they can still remember to call the hotline 1 12 with that poorly received mobile phone in an emergency. I believe they should be rescued soon.

The nationwide dedicated line 1 12, any brand of mobile phone can be dialed anywhere even if there is no signal or even the battery is extremely weak after being turned on. After dialing 1 12, you will immediately enter the voice command as follows: This is the emergency hotline of mobile phone 1 12. If you want to report the case, please dial 0 and we will transfer you to the police station. If you need help, please dial 9 and we will transfer you to the fire station. After Chinese is finished, it will be repeated in English. Just dial 0 or 9 at this time. Someone must answer it. In the case of these three nurses, or when they get lost or get into trouble while climbing the mountain, you should dial 9 and you will get help immediately.

In order to test this function, I have done several field tests in remote mountainous areas and other places with poor reception, and the results are all successful. I hope people all over the country can know about the mobile phone function of 1 12, and I hope everyone can share it with you as much as possible. If you have foreign friends around you, you should also tell them. Moreover, everyone should have a field test for more than three times to increase their impression and memory. I believe that if these three nurses had known this function at the time of the disaster, they should not have been trapped for three nights before being rescued.

2. Do not directly use the containers attached to the bowl and cup noodles.

Please pay attention to your health. Those who like instant noodles must see it. Don't eat directly in the containers attached to bowls and cups.

The article said that the nephew of the colleague who wrote this letter studied in Britain for about a year and a half.

And this nephew, he likes to eat instant noodles with a cup of noodles. Guess what?

My nephew's doctor found a layer of wax on his stomach wall!

Because the container of cup noodles contains an edible wax!

Next time you eat a cup of noodles, touch the cup wall to see if it feels smooth. That's it.

And after eating a cup of noodles for a long time, our liver can't break down this toxin.

Finally, my nephew died while seeking surgical treatment to remove this layer of wax.

So when you eat instant noodles in the future, try to take them out.

In addition, soak in your own bowl, and don't eat directly with the containers attached to the bowl noodles and cup noodles.

For health, don't be lazy! Do you know that?/You know what?

3, very important! Please take off your contact lenses at the barbecue or anywhere that may come into contact with the fire!

My talented classmate heard a terrible thing ... one day, a 2 1 year-old boy wore contact lenses to attend a barbecue party! Just a few minutes after he started to make a fire with charcoal, he suddenly let out a cry, then jumped around in pain and rolled on the ground ... The whole audience was shocked, and no one knew what had happened. Everyone rushed him to the hospital, and the doctor said he would never see him again!

The reason is: contact lenses are made of plastic. When he made a fire, the overheated temperature melted his contact lenses!

So, please tell your friends around you: please don't wear contact lenses when barbecuing and touching fire sources! !

4. Program preview of "Beijing No.7"

A woman's handbag was stolen, which contained a mobile phone, a bank card and a wallet.

Twenty minutes later, when she called her husband to tell him about the theft, he exclaimed, Ah, I just received your message asking for the password of our card, and I will be back soon!

When I arrived at the bank, I was told that all the money in it had been taken out.

The thief used the stolen mobile phone to send a text message to "dear husband" to get the password, and then took the money away in just 20 minutes.

Courses:

Don't expose your relationship with your contacts in the mobile phone address book, and don't define your contacts with "home", "husband", "father" and "mother".