If you have a girl you like, don't make other girls laugh.

1. People who are moved at a glance are unwilling to be friends.

You never know how much you like a person unless you see him with someone else.

If you have a girl you like, don't make other girls laugh.

There is a person who once made you crazy, but now he is desperate to forget.

I stopped looking for you suddenly on purpose, to see if you would find me missing and take the initiative to find me, but every time I found that I couldn't live without you.

6. When I wake up in the morning, you and the sunshine are there. This is the future I want.

7. Your friendship with me is over. Why? It's time to start dating.

8. The whole world can be yours, but you can only be mine.

I can't say why I love you, but I know that you are the reason why I don't love others.

10. There must be such a person who will hold your hand when crossing the road, hold an umbrella for you when it rains, comfort you when you are sad, coax you with a smile when you are angry, hold you tightly in your arms when you cry and say: Baby, you still have me, I am always here.

1 1. Love is meeting in the right place at the right time. There is no need to wait or prepare.

12. I never go back to others in the cold. Then why do you always call me back? You're nobody else.

13. After you like Laozi, Laozi will give you a performance.

14. What a man hurts a woman is not necessarily that he fell in love with someone else, but that he let her down when she had expectations and didn't help her when she was weak.

15. Smoking is bad for the lungs, coffee is bad for the stomach and love is bad for the heart.

16. If you ask me how many times you have flashed in my heart, I will say it once, because you have never really left.

17. Falling in love and getting married when I was a student was the proudest thing in my life.

18. If a thousand people pass by me, I can recognize your footsteps, because 999 people's feet are on the ground, and only your footsteps are in my heart.

19. What do you think is the similarity between love and trains? Sometimes, it shakes.

20. After a long time, you will know that whether you like it or not, whether it is appropriate or not, and whether you can be together are three different things.

Classic phrase: the girl who loves to laugh is not bad, and the girl who makes you laugh is not bad.

1. I give you 10, and he gives you 20. You think he is kind to you, but you don't know that he has 100 and I only have 10.

2. I found a rule: meals are served on China Festival and rooms are opened on foreign festivals.

Someone reaches out a hand to wipe your tears when you fail, which is better than countless people reaching out and clapping for you when you succeed.

Let me tell you a story. Well, once upon a time there were two people, I loved you and I didn't love you. I don't love who's left after you die. I love you, and I love you too.

The relationship between good friends is like hands and eyes. When the hand is injured, the eyes will shed tears, and the eyes will shed tears, and the hands will also wipe tears.

6. What you want to say but dare not say becomes forwarding.

7. You must have been born in a wealthy royal family in a previous life, and the royal family was in civil strife. Before you died, Amar said to you: Son, I hope you will be born in an ordinary family and live a plain and happy life in your next life. So you live a normal life all your life, but it's too late to get princess disease ~

8. After all, you have to get hurt yourself to really learn to be smart.

9. We often misunderstand ourselves so much that we think we are nostalgic for a long time, but in fact we are just having a bad time now.

10. The road still has to go, but there is no turning back.

1 1. Maybe I won't say it, but I feel it; Maybe I didn't show it, but I really care; Maybe I didn't cry, but I was really hurt.

12. The most common mistake we make is to underestimate what we have and pay too much attention to what we can't get.

13. People are sometimes so strange that they won't say a word when they are greatly wronged, and they will cry when they hear comfort.

14. Without the ability to wear a wedding dress, why do you want to take off her underwear?

15. If there is an afterlife, I was born on National Day and died in Tomb-Sweeping Day. When I was born, the whole world was celebrating. When I died, the whole world was sad.

16. Girls who love to laugh are not bad, and girls who make you laugh are not bad.

17. It is better to be beautiful than to live beautifully.

18. When you feel lonely and helpless, think that there are more than one billion cells living only for you.

19. No matter whether your initial lies are well-intentioned or not, the last injury will always be injury.

20. People especially write when they are sad!

2 1. Did you find it? The crying child has milk to eat, and the noisy girl has pain. Generally, girls who are too sensible are unlucky

Sooner or later, someone will take your place in my heart. Don't worry, don't feel guilty and don't say you're sorry.

23. It's more interesting to smile at you when the corners of your mouth rise than to expose you.

24. Many times, when a woman asks you a question, she actually knows the answer, just to see how you lie.

You said I was your life, and I didn't see you die when you left me.

26. If the person I love only loves me, why should I add the first two words?

27. A wise man always keeps his mouth in his heart, while a stupid man keeps his heart in his mouth.

28. Some people are not stupid, but their hearts are not hard enough.

The person you like is so excellent, don't degenerate.

First, you always take care of those who will take care of you.

Second, the cigarette fell in love with the finger, but the finger gave the cigarette to the lips. The cigarette kissed the lips, but gave the heart to the lungs. The lung thought it got the cigarette's sincerity but didn't know it hurt itself! Is it the betrayal of fingers that makes the smoke sad, or the greed of lips that makes the lungs sad?

Order when you are hungry, sleep when you are sleepy, travel when you don't know the way, and navigate as if we don't need each other as long as we have money.

In fact, being free and easy is just pretending to be a hero. How can I love you without shedding a tear?

Love your sharp scars, love your mature innocence, thank you for being so wonderful and dazzling, and be the star in my dull years.

6. The benefits of maturity were not available before, but now they are not needed.

Seven, if, at the end of the side is really not you.

Eight, slowly discover that loving someone is destroying the original self.

Nine, I suddenly found that many people who are indispensable to life were separated when they walked.

10. Sometimes, I wish I could grow up quickly, but when I grow up, I find that I have lost my childhood. When you are single, you begin to envy the sweetness of your lover. When you are in love, you miss the freedom when you are single.

Don't pass the buck. Taking responsibility is the first step of change.

Twelve, in feelings, there will always be points and points; In life, there will always be exchanges.

Thirteen, I naively thought that not thinking, not listening, not seeing is forgetting.

Fourteen, the heart is tired, we must learn to sort out our thoughts, listen to the inner voice, don't be tired of fame and fortune, understand what the heart needs, what it doesn't need, and how to protect it from being hurt again.

It's not that there is no reason to leave. For example, when I cry, you are always laughing.

Sixteen, the person you like is so excellent, don't fall.

Seventeen, a person for a long time slowly got the problem of thinking all day.

Eighteen, there has never been empathy in this world, only self-knowledge of warmth and coldness.

Where there is a square, there are dancers.

In the eyes of a secret admirer, the world is like this. He (she) will observe each other, pay attention to each other's every move and change himself for each other.

Twenty-one, you gave your personality to the constellation, your efforts to the chicken soup, and your luck to koi fish. Then you said to yourself: After listening to a lot of truth, you still can't live a good life.

Twenty-two, if a woman is not sexy, she must be emotional; Without sensibility, it is necessary to be rational; If there is no reason, we must have self-knowledge; If there is no such thing, she will only have misfortune.

Twenty-three, yes, I am so bad, how can I expect someone to love me as much as my life?

Twenty-four, like a person, will be very happy together; To love someone is to be inexplicably lost when we are together.

25. Boredom is very necessary. What a person does in his spare time determines that this person is fundamentally different from others.

26. Never lose someone you shouldn't lose because of your face.

Twenty-seven, when you fail, someone stretches out a hand to wipe your tears, which is better than countless people stretching out a hand to applaud you when you succeed.

Twenty-eight, happiness, hope, success, laughter, set off waves in sunny days; Sadness, loss, pain, sadness, dripping misty rain.

Make a girl happy.

Make a girl happy.

1, the woman pretended to be weak and handed me a bottle of coke to help me unscrew it. I feel so hard when I hold the bottle. Grinding for a while. Tell her I can't unscrew it. Sister is anxious. Ow, ow, are you empty? I said you have to screw me off and invite you to dinner. Sister took it. Give a whimper. Old and miserable.

2. There was a chubby classmate in college who wanted to play games in summer and didn't want to go to physical education class, so he asked for leave and said that his ankle was sprained and his leg was limping. The PE teacher said yes, so she gave the note to the yard. After handing it in, he wants to pretend to be something like this, so he is lame every time he goes out. Later he got used to it and said he couldn't change it. We laughed miserably.

The neighbor held a white wedding these two days, and there was a program to sing in the evening. Last night, when I went to bed early, I heard my neighbor sing you come back early. I can't take it alone. It is acceptable for you to come back and sing once or even six times. This filial piety is touching, but I still cried and sang. I heard it horribly and had a nightmare all night.

A Japanese is being interviewed by a reporter. Reporter, if your mother and your wife fell into the water at the same time, which one would you save first? Japanese, I'll save my mother first. If my wife is gone, I can ask my mother for another one! The audience was deeply moved and applauded for a long time. .

In class, students and teachers discussed the quality of domestic products. The teacher pondered it and told us seriously that there are actually many good domestic products. Let's ask quickly, where is the good one? Teacher, in the advertisement. ...

I took my mother from my hometown and hired a nanny. As a result, when I came back from a business trip, I saw my mother and the nanny choosing beans together, and then my mother insisted on frying them herself. After frying, she asked the nanny if it was delicious, and the nanny said it was delicious. As a result, my mother cooked another dish for the nanny.

7. Today, a female student came to our police station and said that her wallet was stolen in the canteen. We asked him how he lost it, but he didn't pretend. She said that she took a seat in the canteen with her wallet and it was gone when she came back.

8. Cousin Xiaoling, I got into trouble at school. The teacher asked me to take my dad tomorrow! I said, this is not appropriate. Although I am ten years older than you, there is still a gap with my uncle! Brother, you are mature and steady, and there is nothing more suitable! The next day I wore an old-fashioned dress! As soon as the teacher saw me, he quickly got up to meet me. I'm a little flattered, but I heard the teacher say, uncle, are you Xiaoling's grandfather? Please sit down quickly!

9. The couple broke up. The man said, "If you are not married after many years, please call me." . After several years, the woman never found a partner, so she remembered him, picked up her cell phone and made a phone call. Hello, on the other end of the phone, this is matchmaker's matchmaking agency. Can I help you?

10, in the street, an old lady fell down too carelessly. A pupil happened to pass by, so he quickly picked up the old lady and said with concern, Grandma, did you fall in pain? The old lady smiled, and it didn't hurt. What's your name, little friend? He winked at the old lady and proudly replied, Call me Lei Feng! Just then, the old lady suddenly growled at the crowd in the street, caught Lei Feng and tripped me.

1 1. In the past, two roommates in the university were ambitious people. One wants to go to America after graduation, and the other wants to go to Tokyo. Through the efforts of the university, they all realized their dreams. One went to Gome, and the other went to JD.COM. .

12, when I was in junior high school, our classroom was on the fifth floor. I am a very honest person. At that time, there was a nice person in the class (the boss of the class) who always bullied me and asked me to go downstairs and fetch him water to drink. Finally, one day I broke out and gave him some urine or saliva when I was fetching water. From that day on, I took the initiative to fetch water for him every time. . . .

13, I saw a young man riding a motorcycle. He was stopped by pol.ice. The young man got off the bus directly, broke the key, let the tire go, and pushed it onto the road and ran away. . . I just heard pol.ice shouting behind me, come back and push your car away. I won't check the car and ask you for a light!

14. The dog barks in the garden. The cat asked him why he was so sad. The dog said that archaeologists found a large number of biological bones in his master's garden, saying that they might be left by prehistoric creatures! What does this have to do with you, cat? Why are you so sad? The dog barked, those are my private money!

15. How old are my children and I this year? Boy, 3 years old ... I, oh, who will sleep with at night? Boys sleep with their parents when they are at home, and sleep alone when their father is not at home! I, oh, why don't I sleep with my mother? Boy, I don't like Uncle Wang. ....

16, my wife usually calls me you, which makes me a husband when I am alive, a dear after buying clothes, and a melon after quarreling. You became an uncle when you seduced me. Come and play. Really drunk.

17, my son and I went to the hospital to pick up his grandfather. On the way, I told my son that when I saw grandpa, I wanted to say that you finally got out of the hospital and missed me. Who knows that when my son's head jerked, he saw his grandfather and said, "Grandpa, why did you give up treatment?"

18, bought a water cup for the child from the Internet. I got up early and took it to school, and found that the cup was leaking. I twisted it hard, and the child happily took it to school. When I came back from school, I saw that the child didn't drink water. The child yelled at me, you pushed too hard, and the biggest strength in our class has not been unscrewed.

19, mother's original words, I gave birth to such a beautiful son for more than 20 years, and you accompanied me to pay compensation for mental damage for my ugliness! I listened for a long time and silently said I'm sorry.

20. Xiaoming went to the fruit shop and said to the boss, "If I buy 3 Jin of apples with 5 yuan money, 4 Jin of grapes with 6 yuan money and 5 Jin of pears with 7 yuan money, how much should I pay you?" ? The boss said, "74 yuan. Xiao Ming turned away and said, thank you, boss, for helping me solve this math problem!

2 1. On the way home, the bus suddenly turned off and the passengers were halfway. If there are passengers, ask if the bus can still go. The driver was silent and said that there was no way out unless something happened. Unless you push down! It seems that the driver's eldest brother is also a master of folk hidden jokes!

22. When I was in college, my father said to me, Son, I only want two things when you go to college. First, I am lazy and don't want to go out, so don't let your teacher invite parents. Second, I am still young and don't want to be a grandfather.

23. the fool went to the bank ATM the other day and deposited a sum of money. As a result, the family needed money badly, and dad asked the fool to take it out. The fool stood in front of the ATM crying, and the staff rushed over and lost the bank card? The fool shook his head. That's the bank card password, remember? The fool shook his head again. The staff wondered, what happened? The fool cried and shouted, I forgot which machine I put the money in last time!

24. Xiaoming said to the goddess, "I declare you to be my girlfriend!" I will be good to you, I will be a goddess, and I don't like you! Xiao Ming, why? Goddess, because you complain! Xiao Ming turned around and took off his pants. ! Not crooked!

25. The head teacher is very funny. I stayed up all night, and I was late for morning reading when I came back. He asked me what you did last night. I said I slept in the dormitory. He said, "Are you lying to the dog? I had to bow my head silently and answer, hmm.

26. I, dear, although I am not as rich as Xiao Wang, nor have a house and a car like him, I can buy a lot of things you want, but I am willing to be kind to only one person wholeheartedly! Can you marry me? My girlfriend is about to cry! Me, don't be so moved! I think you will be good to you! Girlfriend, you son of a bitch, why didn't you tell me that Xiao Wang was so rich? Is he married now?

27. My friend said he went on a blind date, and the way he looked at the girl. After meeting, they decided to take a walk by the roadside. As a result, I met a few male buddies. These pit goods patted the friend on the shoulder and said, well, please don't call us if you invite the lady to play.

28. We have a grumpy person here. A cyclist deliberately rear-ended his car and cheated him of his money. He got off the bus without saying anything, picked up the hammer and began to hit. The second hammer, the one lying under the bed, ran faster than the rabbit, and the motorcycle was abandoned. 1 10 came, there was no informant, and the car was taken away.

29. In the morning, I warmed milk for my 4-year-old daughter. She is very picky about food and doesn't want to drink it. I told her that after you drink milk, your skin will be as white and tender as milk, which is very beautiful. She believed it and soon finished drinking the milk. When eating dinner, my daughter looked at the millet porridge in the bowl and resolutely refused to drink it. I asked her why, and she said that if she drank millet porridge, she would get pimples like millet! I don't drink!

30. The teacher asked the students, "What do you want to be when you grow up? Xiaogang, I want to be a scientist and make contributions to the people! Xiao Zhi, I want to be a policeman, to eliminate violence for the people! Xiaohong, I want to be a doctor and treat people. The teacher nodded with satisfaction and then asked Xiao Ming, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" "? Xiao Ming stood up and answered loudly: "I want to be a common people!" "Let them all serve me!

3 1, the landlord likes pants but doesn't like shorts since he was a child. Today, my father also asked who still wears pants to answer grandma on a hot day, so my father roared to more than 30 degrees. Two people in Guilin wear long sleeves, one of whom is your grandmother, and you still imitate your grandmother! ! The landlord asked weakly, what about the other party? Dad answers your second grandma.

32. Silly people and I are actually quite cute. Friends, I am very cute. You and I are both stupid and not cute at all. Friend, cut, I won't tell you. . Me, don't go. . . Friend, what, do you think I'm cute again? ! Me, use it to roll faster. Friend, your sister!

33. In class, the teacher asked Xiaoming, what will happen in your bed when you sleep at night? Xiao Ming said that there are sheets. What's on the sheets? Xiao Ming said, "I have a mother." What's on your mother? Xiao Ming said, "I have a father." The teacher said silently, Nima, you don't even cover the quilt at home! !

Last night, my wife and I went to the old people's home and stayed for one night. Get up the next morning, wife, you folded the quilt! ! Me? Why me again? Honey, it's like a kind person letting you stay overnight, and then you sleep with the landlord's daughter! Let you fold a quilt wronged you!

35. I drove past a scenic spot and stopped at the roadside to buy a bottle of mineral water. I asked the children who sold the goods why some mineral water bottles were full and some were not. The child replied that the bottle was filled by my mother, but the bottle was filled by my father.

36. When my son came back from school, my dad came over and slapped him, calling Nima to force him. Don't let dad cry and ask, haven't I always called you dad? Lao tze put your hands up, smelly boy also called? I am worried about stocks. How dare you scream? What should I call you, son? Laozi, parents

37. Girls who don't work hard will have endless stalls and shops in the vegetable market. No matter how hard you work, you won't have time to shop, so you can only work overtime to order takeout.

38. Two days before the start of school is the Victory Day of the Anti-Japanese War, and you can take three days off. Two weeks later, it is the Mid-Autumn Festival, with a three-day holiday. The next three days ushered in the National Day Golden Week holiday for 7 days! ! ! Plus the weekend, we have a full half-month holiday during this time! ! ! If you dare to skip class, Mid-Autumn National Day will last 16 days! ! ! Think about it this way, starting school is not a thing at all!

The family is raising a glass to celebrate their son's entrance to the university. A young waitress slipped and accidentally spilled soup on prospective college students. Before she could apologize, people at the dinner table scolded her. My son is as old as you and has been admitted to college. Can't even serve a plate well. . . When the supervisor saw it, he quickly came to apologize. I'm sorry, she is the number one in the college entrance examination in our city this year, and she came here to work to earn tuition.

40. One day at a class reunion, everyone said how high his salary was. When he asked me, I was pitifully weak and asked for 3,000 yuan. Everyone laughs at me. I'm pathetic. Finally, my wife made it. The audience was instantly silent. This is called a local tyrant.

4 1. When will your parents and baby come back one week before the holiday? What do your parents and baby want to eat today in the first week of the holiday? Your parents, when do you start school in the second week of the holiday? When will your parents and you start school in the third week of the holiday? When do you and your parents start school in the fourth week of the holiday?

42. A family of three eats at home. . The son was holding a piece of meat in his hand. As soon as his hand was loose, the meat fell on the table. . . When the son wanted to get it, the wife smiled gently, honey, the table is dirty, and the meat on the table can't be eaten! Then he put the meat in my bowl. .

43. Several women are talking about what kind of wool should be used for knitting sweaters. One of them said that she had a good idea and wanted to buy a pair of underwear, which she thought should be comfortable to wear. As a result, she took it off and threw it away after wearing it for a while, because it was itchy.

44. A girl in the class is crying in the corner. I comforted her. She said that she was a junior and had no boyfriend, and then she cried even harder. I said, I guess you are demanding? She nodded, maybe. I said, I'm asking too much Be careful to be a bachelor for life. Actually, I have liked you for three years. Look at that. . . Me. . She burst into tears and laughed at once. I think it's good to be single!

45. Talking about Japanese devils with my friends majoring in Japanese, my friends complained to me, forget it, TM, and went to eat a dish, and finally did it, ga! The crotch burst open. I'm laughing, he said. What's even more amazing is cheating in Japanese exams and searching for answers. Search on the internet, TM bad websites all came out!