Her husband took back his illegitimate child and his mother remains a mystery

The mother of the illegitimate child who was brought back by her husband is a mystery

A friend’s message:

Muzi Li:

My husband and I have been in love for 8 years. Married for 10 years, my daughter is 6 years old. My husband likes to play, often comes home late, and we have small quarrels, but our relationship has never changed.

Most of my husband’s friends are boys, some have two children, and some have three. Most of my husband's friends are not working, so we can just fine them a little, but my husband and I both have formal jobs, so it's impossible for us to have a second child. Sometimes they talk about having another baby, but they are all jokes.

A month ago, my husband asked me, would you like to hold a baby? I said I don’t want it. I thought my husband was joking.

During this period, my husband said that his brother-in-law had trouble making money from his business and wanted to borrow 50,000 yuan. I thought he was not an outsider, so I agreed. In the evening, his brother-in-law came over and took the money away. Early the next morning, my husband left and he went to help his brother-in-law with work. At around 7 o'clock, he called me and said that a college student had given birth to a baby and asked if he wanted me. Say no. At around 10 o'clock, I called again and I said no. Unexpectedly, he took the child directly to his sister's house.

I saw the text message his sister sent him the next day, "Don't forget the diapers, everything is fine!" I didn't know until I saw it. I thought about the 50,000 yuan and called his brother-in-law. Sure enough, he also borrowed 10,000 yuan from his brother-in-law and 60,000 yuan from his wife to buy a child. His brother-in-law said, don’t you know? He didn't tell you? I said, I didn’t know anything, and no one told me or discussed it with me.

I called him crying and asked what happened? He said I told you but you didn’t agree. I asked him whose child it was, and he said so what if it was mine, so what if it wasn't mine! I called my father-in-law, and he actually said that people were accusing us of being destitute. I said, have you asked me and thought about my feelings? The father-in-law said, I will pay you back the money I borrowed from you. I learned that it was their family that brought the child home, which meant that their family wanted this boy.

They also said that holding this child is for my own good, but I don’t agree. Is it for my own good? He also said that one child is too lonely, but two children can be companions.

My husband and I started arguing endlessly, and now he runs away from home whenever we quarrel. His sister actually said, who didn’t let you agree, and you agreed and he still left? I finally understood that when his family's interests were involved, they turned against each other and refused to recognize him. I have been with him for 10 years, but I can't be worth a child.

When my husband and I were talking about friends, my family members disagreed. My husband is from a rural area and is very poor. So much so that when we got married, our family bought the house, our family bought the car, and even his sister’s job was found by my father. What a comfortable life, but now it's turned into a mess.

I wrote the divorce agreement and asked my husband to sign it, but he refused to sign it. Just say don't mention that child again, let's live our lives. For the sake of my daughter, I endured it. It seemed peaceful, but I couldn't sleep all night. This is not a small matter, it affects our whole lives.

It is illegal to spend money to buy children, and sometimes I want to sue them. His sister is also a highly educated person, so she is like this. I regret that I was too good to them before, but now they treat me like this.

I swear, I will not let that child enter my house, let alone see him, including his moving in, going to school, getting sick, and many of his problems in the future have nothing to do with me.

I have a question, is this child my husband’s? If not, it is impossible for his family to break up with me. If so, this is a moral issue, and my husband and I can no longer live together. I asked my husband, and he said you can do DNA, but I don’t want to meet his family.

I don’t want my husband to take care of this matter. Whoever wants to raise the child can raise it. He can be his brother or nephew, as long as it has nothing to do with us. It's impossible, as long as this child is in his house for a day, many things will happen. If the husband doesn't call them, they will call him. I would argue endlessly with my husband, and sooner or later the relationship would be over.

I don’t want to get divorced, I still love my husband, and I insist on it every day for the sake of my children.

Now my husband hides everything from me and deletes all his phone calls every day, including attending the baby’s full moon and seeing a doctor (I saw the medical card and named him). I know, but I don't want to expose him, it's pointless.

Am I going to live like this for the rest of my life? I really can't accept that a person who has no blood relationship with me enters my family and their whole family deceives me, defrauds me of my money, and defrauds my feelings.

Please tell me, what should I do? Divorce your husband or expose them. I still feel like I'm dreaming. I didn't expect such a thing to happen to me. My eyes hurt from crying for several days. I also wanted to have a fight with them, but I couldn't. Besides, there's no point in making a fuss. His family is determined to have this child and would rather I get divorced, but they won't change. Because of this, my parents were so angry that they became ill. My husband has not even been to my house for more than a month. There are two intersections between my house and my parents' house.

Reply to blogger:

You have to ask yourself first, are you unwilling to accept this child because you suspect that it is the illegitimate child of your husband and another woman, or are you unwilling to accept this child? No matter what, you don't want to accept this child. If you just have doubts about the child's identity, you can take the child and your husband to the hospital for a DNA test. If the child is your husband's, don't say anything and you can get a divorce. If you can't accept this child even if he is adopted, you can skip the trip to the hospital and just get divorced.

As important members of the family, you and your daughter are indeed unfair to you and your daughter when your husband just takes a baby boy home without your and your daughter’s consent. But you also mentioned in your letter that your husband grew up in a rural area. Maybe you don’t agree with their patriarchal mentality, but when you meet such a man, you either accept or divorce him. To some extent, that man The baby is really much more important than you and your daughter, to them.

Your husband doesn’t understand that you can’t have your cake and eat it too, so he still seems dissatisfied after you gave him such a glorious material life; and you also need to sort out the reasons for avoiding the important and taking the easy. The principle is, on the premise that the child is adopted, would you rather divorce the child in exchange for insulating the child, or would you rather preserve the integrity of the family and accept the baby boy against his will? You must think clearly about this issue. Because judging from the attitude of your husband and his whole family, the child is absolutely necessary. Even if you ask your husband to give you a certificate to draw the line between him and the child, no matter how meaningful it is to you, he still doesn’t want it. To fulfill a father's duty and take care of his children's eating, drinking and drinking?

Clear your thoughts and make decisions as soon as possible. Either accept the child or choose divorce.