Xiehouyu proverb joke story

Once I came out from my mother to find my wife. Seeing my wife, I habitually called out, "Mom!"

2. I found that my bike was flat when I went to work in the morning and wanted my mother to push it outside to refuel. As a result, I said, "Push out my tires." Mom was confused, so I smiled and quickly corrected it. As a result, I said, "Fill my car with gas!"

When I was driving, the female colleague sitting next to me suddenly asked, "Why don't you wear a condom when driving?"

4, the last toilet was convenient, and there was no paper. He said to his wife, "Bring me the paper-wiping donkey!"

5. A girl is lovelorn. I advised her: "Toads with two legs are hard to find, and men with three legs are plentiful!" "

6. Two people were bickering, and suddenly a person next to them said, "You are really full and have nothing to do!"

7. When a colleague had an argument with someone else, he opened his mouth in a hurry and said, "Do you think I grew up eating?" I've always wondered what he grew up eating.

8. Reading posts while eating, reading classics to my wife, and laughing her to death, she said to me, "Read after dinner, or your brain will get indigestion!"

9. I once asked a nearsighted person how many degrees his eyes were, and he wanted to say 400 degrees. The result turned out to be 400 watts, and his stomach hurts!

10, a leader of the Education Bureau checks the exercises between classes. After that, the PE teacher should have announced "dissolution", but in a hurry, he forgot his words and held back for a long time, shouting "retreat!"

1 1. During the internship of P.E. students, many teachers attended classes. He's too nervous. When he finally wanted to disband the team, his mind was blank, and he abruptly uttered a sentence: "Attention, attention! Flash! ! "

12, a group of students went to their home in the suburbs to play. We bought some watermelons to put in the kitchen. I asked a classmate to take a knife to cut it. I haven't been back for a long time. While wondering, he came over with a cut melon in his hand and said in a panic, I cut the pumpkin. Everyone laughed wildly, but two seconds later, everyone laughed even harder. It turned out that he had a melon in his hand!

13 There is a teacher surnamed Jiang in high school, who looks very much like (Tang Priest on a Chinese Odyssey). I went to ask him a question and blurted out, "Teacher Tang, this question ..."

14, a colleague, one day when I was driving on the road, I had a flat tire and asked where there was an inflatable one. Colleague said: "The streets are full of abortions!"

15, go to McDonald's to buy sweet barrels, and finally it's my turn. I can't wait to say, "Give me two rollers!" " "I didn't expect the waiter to say to me loudly;" Two rollers, four dollars! "

16, I met a long-awaited girl who came out of the bathhouse and wanted to make friends with her. She held back for a long time and said, "Are there many men taking a bath?"

17, once I went to dinner, I said to my boss when I checked out, "Husband! Check out! " The proprietress was nearby at that time. ......

18, a teacher played mahjong all night. Seeing that the blackboard had not been wiped, he was furious: "Who is the farmer today?" Don't even clean the blackboard! "

19, I just bought a house and called a buddy excitedly:' I bought a house, but I only need a dime (I forgot to say the word' blank') to decorate it. "The buddy said," Is there only one toilet? Where do you live? "

20. Our teacher stayed to do his homework. If he can't do it, he will copy others'. Then he went to the office to hand in his homework and saw the teacher say, "I copied it!" "

2 1, a gentleman was very nervous on the day of driving test. The examiner embarrassed him and asked him to park his car where there was a fire hydrant on the side of the road. This Curtis said nervously, "Report the fire hydrant. There is an examiner on the roadside. No parking!" "

22. The company keeps a dog named Xiaobai. One day, everyone teased the dog. Colleague A said to the dog with a biscuit, "Xiaobai, only you feed me in the whole office." Three seconds later, the whole office burst into laughter!

-Author: Allen April 2005, 19, Tuesday, 23:32 Reply (7) | Quote (0) Join Cai Bo.

Grasping happiness is a ruthless misunderstanding, which confuses the steps of happiness. When the knot of fate finally opened at a price, it was too late.

evening ......

A ruthless misunderstanding confuses the pace of happiness. When the knot of fate finally opened at a price, it was too late.

It's late

Taking my mother-in-law home to spend her old age safely turned out to be a departure from our original intention.

After two years of marriage, my husband and I discussed bringing my mother-in-law from the countryside to spend her old age safely. My father died when Mr Wang was very young. male

It is the only sustenance of her mother-in-law, who raised him by herself for him to finish college. The word "put up with hardships" is used for mother-in-law.

Never go too far with your health!

I promised again and again that I would immediately clean up a room with a balcony facing south, let my mother-in-law bask in the sun and raise flowers and plants.

Mr. Wang stood in a sunny room without saying a word, but suddenly he lifted me up and walked around the room, bared his teeth at me.

When begging for mercy, the husband said, "Take our mother away."

Mr. Wang is tall, and I like to stick to his chest. I feel that my petite body can be grabbed by him and stuffed into my pocket at any time. while

When my husband and I had an argument and refused to give in, he picked me up and staggered on my head until I was scared.

Begging for mercy fascinates me.

The habits of rural mother-in-law can't be changed for a while. I bought a bunch of flowers in the living room before, but later my mother-in-law couldn't help it:

"You dolls don't know how to live, why buy flowers? Can't eat as a meal! "

I smiled and said, "Mom, with flowers in full bloom at home, people's mood will be better."

Mother-in-law muttered with her head down, and her husband laughed: "Mom, this is the habit of city people. Slowly, you will get used to it. "

My mother-in-law stopped saying anything, but she couldn't help asking how much it cost every time she bought flowers. When I said it, she just

"Tut-tut" smacked his lips. Sometimes, when she sees me buying big bags of things to go home, she asks how much this is and how much that is. I, for example,

The real answer, her mouth smacked louder. Mr. Wang twisted my nose and said, "Little fool, just don't tell her the real price."

Really? "

The happy life is gradually disharmony.

My mother-in-law hates my husband getting up to make breakfast. In her opinion, how can a big man cook for his wife?

At the breakfast table, my mother-in-law's face is often gloomy, so I pretend not to see it. Mother-in-law jingled chopsticks, but she didn't.

Protest loudly. I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace. I'm tired of jumping around. I don't want to throw this away because of the warm bed in the morning.

The only enjoyment, so I turned a deaf ear to my mother-in-law's protest.

My mother-in-law likes to help me with some housework, and I am busier when she does it. For example, she collected all the garbage bags and said wait.

Save enough to sell waste plastics, and there are waste plastic bags everywhere in the house; She doesn't want to wash dishes with detergent, lest she hurt her self-esteem.

I had to secretly wash it again.

Once, my mother-in-law saw me secretly washing dishes at night and slammed the door and squatted in the room.

Cry. Mr. Wang is in a dilemma. Afterwards, Mr. Wang didn't talk to me all night. I spoiled, I cheated, and he ignored me. I was angry,

Ask him, "What did I do wrong?"

Mr. Wang glared at me and said, "can't you give in?" It won't kill you if the bowl is not clean? "

Later, for a long time, my mother-in-law didn't talk to me, and the atmosphere at home began to become awkward. In those days, I lived first.

I'm tired and I don't know who to tease first.

In order to prevent her son from making breakfast, the mother-in-law took on the "heavy responsibility" of making breakfast without hesitation.

My mother-in-law watched my husband eat happily, then looked at me and condemned me for not doing my duty as a wife with her eyes. In order to avoid falling

Embarrassed, I had to buy a bag of milk on my way to work to commit suicide.

When I was sleeping, my husband asked me a little angrily, "Reed, don't you mind my mother's dirty dishes?" hand over

I lost my body, and he threw me a cold back and made me cry. Finally, the gentleman sighed, "Reid, just do it for me."

Can you have breakfast at home? "

I had to go back to the awkward breakfast table.

That morning, I drank the porridge cooked by my mother-in-law, and suddenly felt queasy, and everything in my stomach rushed out.

I tried to keep them from coming up, but they didn't. I threw down the bowl, rushed into the bathroom and threw up.

When I gasped and calmed down, I saw my mother-in-law mixed with complaints, crying in her hometown dialect, and her husband standing at the door of the bathroom angry.

Look at me quietly. I can't talk with my mouth open I really didn't mean to. The first time my husband and I had a heated argument,

Mother-in-law first glared at us, then got up and hobbled out. My husband gave me a bitter look and went downstairs to chase my mother-in-law.

Yes

Accidentally ushered in a new life, but suddenly ruined her mother-in-law's life.

For three days, Mr. Wang didn't go home, not even a phone. I am upright. I think I've been wronged since my mother-in-law came.

What else do you want from me?

Somehow, I always want to throw up, I have no appetite for anything, things at home are in a mess, and my mood is extremely bad.

. Later, my colleague said, "Reid, you look pale." You'd better go to the hospital. "

The result of the hospital examination is that I am pregnant. I understand why I suddenly vomited that morning, and there is a trace of sadness in happiness.

Complaint: Why didn't Mr. Wang and his mother-in-law who had experienced it think of this at all?

At the gate of the hospital, I saw Mr. After only three days away, he was much haggard. I want to turn around and leave, but his

The appearance makes me feel distressed. I have no choice. I called him.

My husband followed the sound and saw me, but he didn't seem to know me. There was a hidden disgust in his eyes, which stung coldly.

Hurt me.

I told myself not to look at him. I reached out and stopped a taxi. At that time, I wanted to shout to my husband:

"Honey, we have a baby!" Then he lifted it and spun it happily.

What I hope won't happen. In the taxi, my tears slowly fell.

Why do quarrels make love so bad? When I got home, I lay in bed thinking about my husband, thinking that he was full of eyes.

I don't like it I cried with a corner of the quilt in my arms.

There is the sound of rummaging through drawers at home at night. Turning on the light, I saw my husband's tearful face. He is taking money. I'm cold.

Look at him quietly and say nothing. He turned a blind eye to me and left in a hurry with his passbook and money.

Maybe Mr. Wang will leave me completely. What a rational person! Love and money are so clearly divided. I sneered a few times.

Tears "Hua Hua".

The next day, I didn't go to work. I wanted to clear my mind completely and talk with my husband.

When I found Mr. Wang's company, the secretary looked at me strangely and said, "Mr. Chen's mother had a car accident and was in the hospital."

"

I was dumbfounded.

I flew to the hospital and found my husband when my mother-in-law had already left.

Mr. Wang never looked at me, and his expression was stiff. I looked at my mother-in-law's thin and pale face, and my tears could not stop: Oh, my God! How come?

Like this?

My husband didn't say a word to me until my mother-in-law was buried, and even looked at me with deep disgust.

About the car accident, I still learned from others that my mother-in-law went to the station in a daze after going out, and she wanted to go back to her old age.

Going home, the more her husband chases her, the faster she walks. When crossing the road, a bus came head on. ......

I finally understand my husband's disgust. If I hadn't vomited that morning, if we hadn't quarreled, if ......

In his mind, I am the sinner who indirectly killed his mother.

Mr. Wang moved into her mother-in-law's room silently and came back with the smell of wine every night. I have been troubled by guilt and inferiority.

I can't breathe. I want to explain to him. I want to tell him that we are going to have a baby, but looking at his cold eyes, I put everything down.

These words were swallowed back. I would rather my husband beat me or scold me, although these accidents were not my intention.

The days are suffocating, repeating day by day, and the time for my husband to go home is getting later and later. We are deadlocked, stranger than strangers.

Awkward. I am a knot tied to his heart.

Once, I passed a western restaurant and saw my husband and a young girl sitting face to face through the transparent French window.

He gently combed the girl's hair, and I understood everything.

First I stayed, then I went into the western restaurant and stood in front of my husband, staring at him intensely, without a tear in my eyes. I what?

I don't want to say it, and I have nothing to say.

The girl looked at me, looked at my husband, stood up and wanted to go. My husband reached out and held her, and then, just like that, never again.

Look at me weakly.

I can only hear my slow heartbeat, beating on the dying pale edge.

I'm the loser. If I stand still, I will fall with the baby in my belly.

That night, my husband didn't come home. In this way, he made me understand that with the death of my mother-in-law, our love also passed away.

.

He never came back. Sometimes when I come back from work, I see that the wardrobe is passive-he comes back to get his own things.

.

I don't want to call him. I tried to explain to him that everything was completely gone.

I live alone and go to the hospital for a physical examination. Every time I see a man holding his wife for a careful physical examination, my heart breaks.

It's broken. My colleague vaguely advised me to have an abortion, but I said no. I was crazy to give birth to this child, which counts.

Make amends for your mother-in-law's death.

My husband was sitting in the living room when I came back from work. The room is full of smoke, and there is a piece of paper on the coffee table. There's no need to look, I know.

What's on the road? Mr. Wang walked for more than two months, and I gradually learned to be calm. I looked at him, took off my hat and said:

"Wait a minute, I'll sign it."

He looked at me with complicated eyes, just like me.

I unbuttoned my coat and said to myself, "Don't cry ..."

My eyes are moist, but I try my best not to cry.

Hang up my coat, and my husband's eyes are fixed on my bulging belly. I smiled and walked over to drag the paper. Look at that.

Without looking, sign your name and push it to him.

"Reed, are you pregnant?"

This is the first time my husband has spoken to me since my mother-in-law's accident. I can't hold my eyes any longer, and my tears "crash".

Let's go I said, "Yes, but it doesn't matter. You can go now. "

Mr. Wang did not leave. We looked at each other in the dark. Mr. Wang lay on me slowly, and tears penetrated the quilt. In my heart.

Many things are so far away that I can't get there no matter how far I run.

I can't remember how many times my husband told me "I'm sorry". I thought I would forgive, but I can't. In western food.

In front of that girl, Mr. Hall looked at me with cold eyes, which I will never forget in my life.

We carved deep scars on each other's hearts. Mine is unintentional; He did it on purpose.

Look forward to the past and let it go, but the past can't come back!

The thought of the baby in my belly warms my heart, but for my husband, my heart is as cold as frost, and I don't eat anything he buys.

Don't give him any gifts, and don't talk to him. From the moment I signed that paper, marriage and love died in my heart.

Sometimes my husband wants to go back to the bedroom. When he comes, I will go to the living room, and my husband has to go back to her mother-in-law's room to sleep.

At night, sometimes there will be a slight groan from my husband's room, and I am silent. This is a trick he used to play.

As long as I ignore him, he will pretend to be ill, and I will surrender and care about what happened to him. He would grab me and laugh. he

I forgot, at that time, I was distressed by love. Now, what do we have?

Mr. Wang moaned intermittently until the baby was born. He buys things for children almost every day, baby products, children.

Supplies, as well as children's favorite books, were packed in bags and soon filled his room. I know he touched me in this way.

And I have been unmoved. He had to shut up in his room and type on the computer. Maybe he is online dating, but for me.

It doesn't matter anymore.

One night in the late spring of the following year, the severe abdominal pain made me shout, and Mr. Wang rushed in as if he were not there at all.

I didn't take off my clothes to sleep, just to wait for this moment.

My husband picked me up and ran downstairs, stopped the car, held my hand tightly all the way, and kept wiping the sweat on his forehead.

When I got to the hospital, I picked it up and ran to the obstetrics department. Lying on his thin and warm back, an idea suddenly broke into Xi: in this life,

Who will love me like him?

Mr. Wang held the delivery room door and watched me go in. I smiled at him with warm eyes and pain.

When I came out of the delivery room, my husband looked at me and my son, smiling and his eyes were wet. I touched his hand. Wang Xiansheng

Smile at me, and then, slowly and wearily, you fall down. I called his name in pain ... Mr. Wang smiled and didn't open his eyes.

eye ......

I thought I would never shed a tear for my husband again, but the truth is that I have never torn my body with such severe pain.

Body.

The doctor said that when my husband's liver cancer was discovered, it was absolutely a miracle that he could persist for so long. What did I ask the doctor?

When did you find out? The doctor said it five months ago and comforted me: "Prepare for the funeral."

I ignored the nurse's stop, went home, rushed into my husband's room and turned on the computer, and my heart was suffocated by pain. Mister's

He found liver cancer five months ago, and his moan was true. I really thought. ......

The 200,000 words on the computer are messages written by my husband to my son:

Son, for your sake, I have always insisted. My greatest wish now is to wait for a look at you before I fall down ... I know,

There will be a lot of happiness or setbacks in your life. How happy it would be if I could accompany you through this growth process, but

Dad didn't have the chance. Dad is on the computer, writing down the problems you may encounter in your life one by one, and waiting for you to encounter these.

When you have a question, you can refer to your father's opinion. ......

..... Son, after writing these more than 200,000 words, I feel that I have accompanied you through the whole growth process. Really, dad is very happy.

Love your mother. She is very hard, and the person who loves you the most is also my favorite person. ......

From my son's kindergarten to primary school, middle school, university, to work and love, I have written in great detail.

Here we are.

Mr. Wang also wrote me a letter:

Dear, marrying you is the greatest happiness in my life. Forgive me for hurting you and hiding my illness, because

I hope you have a good mood to wait for the baby's birth ... honey, if you cry, it means you have forgiven me, so I will.

Smile, thank you for always loving me ... I'm afraid I have no chance to give these gifts to my children in person. Please give them to him for me every year.

Several gifts, the dates of which are written on the boxes. ......

Back to the hospital, Mr. Wang was still unconscious. I brought my son over and put him beside me. I said, "Open your eyes and smile.

Next, I want my son to remember his warmth in your arms ... "

Mr. Wang struggled to open his eyes and smiled slightly. The son nestled in his arms, waving pink hands. I "crack"

Press the shutter and tears will flow freely on my face. ......

-Author: Allen April 2005 18, Monday 19:39 Reply (22) | Quote (0) Join Cai Bo.

This woman is awesome! This woman is awesome!

A woman playing golf accidentally hit the ball into a nearby forest. She went to the forest to look for it and saw a frog fall into a trap and couldn't jump out. The frog said to the woman, "hello, I am actually a god." If you save me, I can grant you three wishes. " The woman rescued the frog from the trap.

The frog said, "I'm sorry, I was in such a hurry just now that I forgot to tell you that you can make three wishes at will, but when you realize each wish, there must be an additional condition, that is, your husband can get your wish ten times higher at the same time." The woman readily agreed. The frog said, "When you think about it, you can make a wish."

Woman: "My first wish is that I become a very beautiful woman."

Frog: "out of gratitude to you, I remind you again that your husband will also become a very handsome man, ten times more attractive than you, and countless girls will like him." You must think it over. "

Woman: "I am already very beautiful, and my husband will not change his mind."

As a result, women become very beautiful.

Frog: "Please say your second wish."

Woman: "Please let me have 100 million dollars in the bank."

Frog: "I remind you again that your husband can get a deposit of $654.38+0 billion at the same time. He may go bad when he has money, maybe. . . "

Woman: "It doesn't matter if what he has is mine."

Frog: "well, your second wish has also come true." Please say the third one. "

Woman: "Please give me a mild heart attack."

-Author: Allen April 2005 18, Monday 19:22 Reply (4) | Quote (0) Join Cai Bo.

Ordinary husband classic 1, no money, no power, no longer good to you, can you follow me?

Buying a computer without broadband is like becoming a monk before eating.

I won't bend over when money falls from the sky, because even pies won't fall from the sky, let alone money.

Buy me 10 cigarettes, why don't you go to a nightclub?

If I want to sweep the floor, I will never wash the dishes. If I want to wash the dishes, I will never sweep the floor. Both? You think I'm an alien!

6. It is better to lie in bed and sleep while watching TV.

Give me a fulcrum, and I'll put my neighbor's car in the ditch so that he won't honk when he sees me.

8. None of the women who participated in the beauty pageant can find a good man, because all the good men are married, such as me.

9. If the leader doesn't give me a raise next month, I will resign. Before I resign, I will give him two Chinese and kill him.

10, if * * can fly, who will buy a plane? Go to heaven.

1 1, I can't find my tie again. Didn't you find a rag yesterday?

12. In Egypt, a man can marry four wives, which is very tiring. China is better.

13, and you made me kneel on the washboard. Kneeling on the electric heater is unbearable!

14. Even if I were a toad, I would never marry my mother toad.

15, I definitely didn't feel a catty of white wine, because I died after drinking half a catty.

16, reading a newspaper in the toilet is equivalent to rubbing * * shares after defecation, which is a process, otherwise it is not called completion.

17, if the son is disobedient, he can fight appropriately, otherwise he will not show the majesty of Lao Tzu. Taiwan Province X is like this.

18, for my mother's birthday, it is better to send two bundles of bones to cook, at least as a snack.

19, unless the country changes monogamy, I won't go to see netizens.

20. I will still look for you in my next life, because you are the stupidest except me.

-Author: Allen April 2005 18, Monday 19: 16 Reply (2) | Quote (0) Join Cai Bo.

Happy event 1. Woman: "I can marry anyone as long as I have money." Man: "Will you marry the safe in the bank?"

When arguing, the difference between a man and a woman is like the difference between a pistol and a machine gun.

My wife wants to lose weight, so she goes cycling every day. As a result, the horse lost 40 pounds in a month.

4. Patient: "Doctor, you left your scissors in my stomach." "Never mind, I have another one."

Judge: Why do you print counterfeit money? The defendant said innocently, because I can't print real money.

6. Wife: "Men are timid." Husband: "Not necessarily, otherwise why should I marry you?"

7. Part I: Hahahahaha Part II: Hehehehehehehehehehehehe. Transverse criticism: neuropathy

8. If the cold world we live in is still hard to change, at least I still have your face to melt the ice and snow.

9. Thief A: "How much did you rob today?" Thief B: "No, just read the newspaper tomorrow."

10. Teacher: "Peter, do you know how many years a mouse can live?" Peter: "It depends on the cat's mind."

1 1. Pig Bajie: My name is Sai Pan An, and many beautiful women are waiting for me! The Monkey King: Unless you surf the Internet, you idiot.

12. The daughter asked her mother, "Was Dad shy before?" "If he wasn't shy, you would be at least four years older now!"

13. Father: You are so old, it's time to find a wife. Son: Yes, but there are too many people. Whose wife am I looking for?

14. Female: "Why do you always chew candy when you talk to me?" Man: "How can there be so many sweet words without chewing sugar?"

15. Female: "Does your fiance know your age?" Woman B: "Yes, he knows part of it."

-Author: Allen, April 2005, 16, Saturday, 22:20 Reply (0) | Quote (0) Join Cai Bo.

Letter of apology from a girl from Peking University to her boyfriend Dear Brother Xiaobai, you have been angry with me for 1 16 hours and 47 minutes. I know you just want me to admit my mistake to you first, and I know that you will definitely come to my alumni book to secretly see my recent situation, so I will take this opportunity to write you a letter and tell you that I don't care where you are.

Also, by the way, I want to remind you that your student ID card may not be found, but I have it now.

And your library card and this month's monthly ticket, all for me. Hey, it's no use asking. You and I are both angry and have no mood to read in the library. Let's just relax and play for a few days. Monthly ticket, anyway, you and I are angry, and you don't have to come to see me all the time. Just leave it in my room. Just because Zhang Zhe didn't get the monthly ticket this month, let him help you use it first.

You don't have to worry about me, white brother. I will take good care of myself. Don't worry. Have a good exam during the day, and have dinner with Brother Xiaoqiang and Brother Weili for a few days without exams. And Zhang Zhe, you know, yes, the guy who chased me hard in high school. I was angry when I heard about you, so I had to come and see me. Oh, it's very kind of you to refuse. It's just that you can't come to see me this Thursday. I can treat him well. After all, we were in love in high school. I'm going to make him my best fruit salad. I wonder if he will like it. Didn't you fall in love with me after eating my fruit salad? I'm sure he will like it, too.

You don't have to worry that I will be lonely when I study alone, because I met a handsome guy in the library yesterday. He is taller than you, isn't he? He said that he would always study with me and help me to occupy my seat in the future. Oh, by the way, I promised him that in return, I would treat him to hot pot. Probably after the exam. If I take the initiative to apologize to you then, I will remember to take you with me. I know you like hot pot best, but I left your meal card with me. Maybe your food is not much better these days.

Also, I used the glacier to enter your QQ, because I don't think you will be in the mood to surf the Internet in recent days, so I sent my greetings to the MM in your QQ one by one. Your sister Sakura Juanzi wants to send you photos. I intuitively found that she would not be beautiful, so I turned her down for you, for fear of scaring you. Your sister Europa said she agreed to your request. I have set a time for you to meet her at the gate of McDonald's at 7 o'clock tonight. Look at this letter. It's not too late. There's still half an hour left.

By the way, the two little goldfish you asked me to look after for you are both alive and well now. You know I like cats, so I have a good one. It stays at home with your goldfish babies every day, and your babies are always ready to go to a good place ~ ~ ~

Ok, no more writing. You are very manly this time. You never admit your mistake to me first. All right, I'll give you a chance. Just wait until I admit my mistake to you first. When I have a candlelight dinner with Zhang Zhe this week and have enough self-study in the library with that handsome guy, I will take the initiative to ask you to admit my mistake.

You didn't go to school these days. It doesn't matter. Just relax。 I can't find a job in the future. I read an article on the Internet saying, "It's better without a job. You can complete your childhood dream of wandering singers and sing all the way from Shenyang to Tibet with your guitar. " How romantic ......

Okay, I won't tell you. My phone is ringing again. It's a handsome boy in the library. I have to recite legal questions. The exam is coming soon. If I fail, I will be fined. But don't worry, money is a thing apart. Just hang up, as long as I'm outside now.

You can play outside with peace of mind. Don't worry. I came for everything. I will take the initiative to apologize to you. Wait a minute.

Goodbye ~ ~ ~ `.

A reply from a Peking University boy to his girlfriend (hilarious)?

Dear meow meow:

We have been angry for a long time. If I remember correctly, it has been two weeks. I am glad to read your letter. I'm relieved to know that you are well. You said you didn't care about me, but I couldn't let you go in my heart. Who makes me a single-minded person?

I have to tell you one more thing. Last time you used a glacier to access my QQ, you refused my request to send photos to Juanzi's sister KINOMOTO SAKURA. I didn't appreciate it, but when I met them, I knew you were very kind to me. You want to protect me. It turns out that your intuition is really accurate. They are even uglier than you! And that European girl, she surprised me. You lied to her the other day that I invited her to meet, but I didn't go. Instead of being angry, she actually said that I had a personality, because other boys didn't stand her up and even obeyed her, except me. 1 2, the third day after you wrote to me, she even came to see me at school, but to be honest, she is much better looking than you.

By the way, my student ID card and library card have been reissued for loss reporting, and there are monthly tickets and so on. Give it to your classmates and help the poor. I don't need it anyway, that sister ou.