Looking for funny chat history jokes!

Female: Are you there?

Male: I am everywhere!

Female: Dizzy...

Male: Come on, faint in my arms, Com on baby!

Female: Haha... What is your name?

Male: I didn’t scream, and you didn’t molest me?

Female: I’m asking for your name.

Male: Oh yeah~ My surname is Nangong, Pengyou, or Nan Pengyou for short!

Female: Haha, friend...

Male: Yes, please call me by my full name, boyfriend?

Female: Here you are, taking advantage of me again...

Male: You are not a vegetable in the market, why should I take advantage of you?

Female: You...

Male: Oh, shed tears! In fact, that is my stage name. My surname is Ni and my name is Lao Gong. What's yours?

Female: Um...my name is Xiaowei!

Male: So it’s you!

Female: Do you know me?

Male: Well, I hum to you every day!

Female: Why?

Male: Xiaowei, do you know how much I love you...

Female: Haha, you are so funny!

Male: Everyone says that!

Female: You are so immodest.

Male: Wrong! I am not hypocritical!

Female: You are so narcissistic!

Male: Wrong! I am confident!

Female: I can take you...

Male: I weigh 60 kilograms, can you take it in?

Female: ... (depressed) How old are you?

Male: It’s indescribable, very burly!

Female: I asked you your age?

Male: Two two is four, four forty six, sixteen plus eight minus four is what?

Female: Twenty... Male: The answer is correct, but unfortunately there is no prize... What about you?

Female: Haha, I’m eighteen.

Male: Eighteen is great!

Female: How can you see it?

Male: It is said that eighteen or eighteen is a flower!

Female: So what?

Male: I dare to pick you off, what do you think?

Female: I am a rose with thorns, are you not afraid?

Male: I can’t type the word “pa”.

Female (changing the topic): Where are you from?

Male: Central Plains

. Woman: Um...where is the Central Plains?

Male: I’m ashamed, I have no fixed home in the world!

Female: Real or fake?

Male: Can I coax you with your wisdom?

Female: That’s true...but don’t you want to have a real family?

Male: Why don’t you want to, it’s just...

Female: Just what?

Male: It’s just that no girl wants to compete with me**.

Female: Let’s find one!

Male: The reality of today’s society is that true love is hard to find. How easy is it?

Female: Hey, don’t be so disappointed, there will be something!

Male: Will you? I'm so lonely, I don't know when I can get rid of it?

Female: Are you still lonely when I chat with you now?

Male: No, I feel good, but it’s just a temporary feeling...

Female: Aren’t you afraid that you won’t be able to type?

Male (comes suddenly): Yes, I want to pick your thorny rose.

Female: I have collected the thorns. Can you pick them and bring me home without letting me wither?

Male: There are two songs that are my promise to you...

Female: Which two songs?

Male: "Xiao Wei" and "The Flower Protector".

Female: Really?

Male: Indeed, this heart can be judged by the world and the sun and the moon!

Female: Well, boyfriend!

Male: Haha, it would be better to call me Lao Gong!

Female: Well...husband!

Male: Shhh...Honey, stop talking, someone is watching our conversation!

Female: Oh, it’s true