A particularly humorous cold copy on the Internet.

1. Last April Fool's Day, a little girl got on my car. We were chatting in the car. She said that her family was rich and her clothes were expensive. Many men chased her. When she got off the bus, she said, "Sorry, Master. Today is April Fool's Day. I lied to you just now. " I said, "I knew you were bragging." She said, "No, I called you handsome the first time I got on the bus. Don't take it to heart! " "

2. Listening to the teacher in class, my favorite sentence is "Let's call the roll!" Every time I hear this sentence, I will secretly call: "Haha! This class is not for nothing. "

3. A master went to a restaurant to eat. While eating vegetables, he caught a fly and called the manager. Manager: "Sorry, I'll change it for you." Master: "No need!" Manager: "What do you want?" Master: "I just want to tell you that monks don't eat meat, so help me eat it!" " "People around you are speechless with shock, silently feeling: people at the master level are just different!

I walked with a girl yesterday. She said it was cold. I said to her, "Have you heard this joke? A man and a woman were walking, and the girl said it was cold, so ordinary young people took off their clothes and put them on her. The young artists unbuttoned their clothes and held her in their arms. The lack of young people made her learn to run by herself. " She smiled for a while and said, "Another silly boy told a cold joke."

I quarreled with my girlfriend last night. My girlfriend was very angry and scolded me: "You are simply a pug, with no skills at all!" I was very angry and retorted: "Dare to say that I am incompetent, ok, I will show you my housekeeping skills today!" " "Girlfriend:" An ace in the hole? Listen, you admit that you are a dog! "

6. Mosquito: "Mom, I learned to fly, and I can fly very well." Mother Mosquito: "How do you know you can fly well?" Mosquito: "Because I just went out for a walk and heard a lot of applause."

7. High school history exam, listing three major events from 1950 to 1985 in China. One god in the class failed, so he resolutely listed: 1952, my father was born, 1955, my mother was born, 1982, a bolt from the blue, a loud noise, and a great man like god was born!

8. In physics class, the teacher asked whether the current was getting bigger or smaller. The whole class began to quarrel like a vegetable market: "Big! Big! Small! Small! Big! Big! ..... "The students in the last row suddenly looked up and shouted," Open! Leopard, kill! Kill! "

9. In junior high school, when the physics teacher was in class, a classmate fell asleep. The teacher hit him with chalk on the platform, but he didn't respond. Before he knew it, he was ready to fight. He said very loudly, "teacher, you hit me twice and still hit me?" You think I didn't know when I was asleep. I just have small eyes and can't see clearly. "

10. Teacher: "Foreigners read more than a dozen books every year, and they all go to school by bus. What are you doing on the bus? This is the gap. " Student: "Teacher, we can't get on the bus. This is also the gap."