Find the full text of the joke "Look at the bag on Lao Zi's head"

1. A beautiful woman is on the night shift, followed by a man of the same color. This beautiful woman is very scared and is passing a cemetery. People of the same color are about to start. The beauty went to a grave and said, "Dad, open the door, I'm back." Scared the sexy man to run away. The beauty smiled proudly for her cleverness, but the laughter did not fall. A gloomy voice came from the grave and said, "Daughter, why did you forget your key again?" Scared the beautiful woman to run away screaming. At this time, a grave robber climbed out of the grave and said, "It affected my work and scared you to death." Suddenly I found an old man in front of the tombstone, with a chisel in his left hand and a hammer in his right. Stop! Stop! Stop! ..... When digging a tombstone, the grave robber asked in surprise, "What are you doing"? The old man said deeply, "these black sheep have carved my name wrong." I will come out and change it myself! " ! Is this also wrong? You change it for me "Hearing this, the grave robbers ran away in fright. Looking at the back of the grave robber, the old man sneered: "It scared me to death to grab business with Lao Zi." The old man accidentally dropped the chisel on the ground. He was about to bend down to pick it up when he saw a big black hand sticking out of the grass and a cold voice: "Ah! Don't you dare fucking change my house number. I think you are tired of living! ".Scared the old man even rolling and crawling away. A refugee climbed out of the grass, picked up the chisel on the ground and sighed, "It's so hard to pick up a piece of scrap iron these days. "

2. People are not as good as cats.

The husband was fed up with his wife's cat, so he grabbed it and went to the Woods to throw it away. But when he got home, the cat was lying quietly at the door, whispering to him with satisfaction. The husband was so angry that he stuffed the cat into a sack and went out. He walked 10 km, turned left and walked 15 km, then turned northeast and walked 20 km west, then let the cat out of the sack and left by himself.

An hour later, the husband called his wife: "Has the cat come home?"

"Yes, I will be back five minutes ago. Dear, why do you ask this? "

"You put this beast on the phone, I can't find my way home!"

Mother mouse was striding along the kitchen floor with a group of little mice, when suddenly a cat jumped out.

The cat cried, "Meow! Mimeow！”

Mother mouse also called back: "Meiyu! Mimeow！”

The confused cat left, and the mother mouse said to her little mice, "Look, am I right?" I told you that it is always useful to learn one more foreign language. "