Sichuan dialect skit- lines about seeing a doctor

Old man: (Sichuan dialect) Ouch, they say Beijing is fun, so nice, so cold! When you arrive in Beijing, you still can’t say that the Great Wall is not a hero. Well, it’s even colder when you get to the Great Wall. The wind is blowing and it’s so cold. You ask those Beijingers, do you know where the Ten Thousand Hospital (Hospital) is? Damn it, you are shaking your head so hard that you can’t understand it. Only people in Beijing can understand it if you have to speak Mandarin

(Trump) Does that guy know ten thousand? Where are you in front of me? I shook my head again. Are you from Beijing? I speak Beijing dialect and you don’t know how to say it. Oh, forget it, forget it. . . If you have to ask, why don’t you go find it yourself? Hey guys, where is that hospital in Beijing?

Ouch, there is a hospital over there. Let me see if there is a doctor behind me

Oh, doctor. Is there a doctor?

Doctor: Who is who?

Old man: Oh, doctor

Doctor: (Chuan) I will pretend to be a doctor and leave him alone Oh, I'm willing to risk it

Old man: Hey doctor

Doctor: Comrade, let's see a doctor, okay, okay

Old man: Yeah

Doctor: okay, okay, okay Just tell me about your symptoms first

Old man: Doctor, I’m afraid I’m too cold. I’m too cold

Doctor: What?

Old man: I'm feeling cold

Doctor: When your mother arrives, you should go to the train station to pick her up

Old man: You. . . . You insist on being comfortable, oh, the old man has arrived, uh, I am this. . . .

Ouch, I'm not right. It hurts again when I say it. Ouch

Doctor: I understand you are sick, right?

Old man: Oh

Doctor: It doesn’t matter if you are sick. Sit down first and talk about the symptoms slowly.

Old man: Oh, yes

Doctor: Record it carefully. Come on, come on, this patient. Well, we still have to take care of you, come on, come on, don’t be in a hurry

Old man: (Chuan) Ouch, I’m in pain from the strangulation

Doctor: Speak slowly, I’ll tell you this. Can you understand Mandarin? First of all

Old man: (Chuan) Oh, I can understand your Mandarin, even if you say it horizontally or vertically

Doctor: Oh, can you speak Mandarin< /p>

Old man: (Chuan) Ouch, my mother, I have to speak Mandarin again. I have been vomiting that Mandarin every day in Beijing for the past few days, and my tongue is curling up and hurting. Ouch, I need to see a doctor to help him vomit again. Why don’t you be busy? I asked him, is this the Department of Internal Medicine? If the Department of Surgery is set up in the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology, it would be a shame to my ancestors. Oh, I want this doctor to know that I am a patient. I am afraid that I have to use Mandarin for that title. Oh, why should I use Mandarin for that title? Are you busy? Duo, let me do Duo first

Ouch, hey, ouch, don’t choke in Mandarin, yes. People in Beijing speak with a heavy nasal sound, and the name should be called “Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, Ouch”

(Trump) I’m choking on Mandarin. Ouch, hey, ouch, where’s that doctor? Doctor, I want to kiss you and call me that Mandarin I’m talking about.

First of all First of all, I want to kiss you

Doctor: What did you say

Old man: I want to kiss you

Doctor: I think you are really sick You know, I'm a boy, I'm a boy, okay? Male

Old man: I know, I know you're a male, I know you're a male

Doctor: Yes, kiss me What's the point?

Old man: Oh, I want to kiss you. Are you snuggling inward or outward?

Doctor: Speak clearly and slowly. Speak slowly. What did you say?

Old man: Internal or external knocking?

Doctor: Hey, internal medicine or surgery

Old man: My opponent

Doctor: Internal medicine is really not easy

Old man: That’s it Nothing can happen

Doctor: Then sit down and explain your condition first. If you say it, I will remember it.

Old man: (Chuan) Hey, this doctor is very strange. If it comes, just call him to shrink the tube. If the doctor calls to shrink, he will shrink. (Trump) Doctor, I started to shrink.

Doctor: Say

Old man: I am shrinking

Doctor: Speak slowly

Old man: I am shrinking slowly. I have shrunk to the ground. If I shrink again, I just can’t shrink. Ouch, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

Doctor: Hey~~~hey~~~ Why are you sitting on the ground?

Old man: You told me to shrink down and I shrank. Well

Doctor: I asked you to speak with your mouth

Old man: After talking for a long time, you asked me to tell you about the symptoms

Doctor: I know the symptoms. Right

Old man: Oh, you’re kidnapped

Doctor: When I say sit up, sit up, sit up, sit up, people think I’m bullying you. It’s just

Old man: Doctor Ah

Doctor: Ah

Old man: After I got cold, my whole body was very tender

I am so tender, I am so tender

Zhao: Don't shout. The hospital must keep quiet. What are you yelling about? Just say it slowly and gently

Old man: Oh, doctor, you are kidnapped. I didn’t mean to make a fuss. Then I have a lot of rakes on my body. I’m so good at raking< /p>

Zhao: What are you afraid of?

Old man: I am very good at raking

Zhao: Don’t be afraid. What are you afraid of? What is there to be afraid of when seeing a doctor? ? Ah, don't be afraid, tell me if you have any illness

Old man: Oh, doctor, you are abducted again, you are abducted, I am not afraid, I am raking and raking, and I am shouting. Wow, it’s so, so, so much

Zhao: Why are you so scared? Can you tell me the important thing, okay? Tell me the important thing.

Lao: Yes.

I started to feel pain in my head since yesterday when it was dark. My forehead started to hurt. That is to say, it hurts to scratch the front, and it also hurts to scratch the back. The eyes are blinking. , my nose is buzzing, I can’t even turn my tongue, my neck is so stiff, my ears are buzzing, oh, it’s okay not to cough, oh, I Cough, oh, my belly hurts when I pull it up, and my knees are screwed and crooked, and my ribs are hurting. Doctor, please give me a fuck. It’s up to you. In the past two days, my fingers and toes were all covered with icicles, especially the crotch fingers. Ouch, what a coat, you sparrow.

Zhao: This is called chilblain, ours is called chilblain

Old: Frozen buns

Zhao: Chilblain

Old: Frozen Bao'er frozen bao'er frozen bao'er

Zhao: We call him frozen bao'er in Mandarin, what kind of frozen bao'er is he? I

Old: I've been talking about it for a long time and they also call it frozen bao'er< /p>

Zhao: I was led into the ditch by you. Make it simple like this. How about I check it out for you?

Old: You have to do it

Zhao: Well, first tell me which part of your body hurts. Which part of your body hurts? Location

Old: I can’t even figure it out, oh, that doctor

Zhao: What’s wrong

Old: Don’t touch me here

Zhao: Why

Old: I'm afraid it's too late

Zhao: What's going on? Why are you running?

Old: Doctor, I'm afraid I'm going to throw a javelin

Zhao: Let me tell you, I finally understand what you said

Old: He's so happy that he understands

p>

Zhao: You are an athlete in javelin throwing. I didn’t expect you to be an athlete even though you are not that big. Hahahahaha

Old: That doctor~~~

Zhao: What’s wrong

p>

Old: That doctor~

Zhao: Yeah

Old: You mean that javelin~~

Zhao: Ah

< p>Old: It’s the javelin thrown upward~~

Zhao: You go up

Old: I’m the javelin down~

Zhao: Small side mark~

Old: So

Zhao: What kind of relatives are you looking for? There are no relatives

Old: So where is your toilet?

Zhao: Do ??you know Master Mao who burns the boiler in our boiler room? Do you know Master Mao?

Old: Not the same

Zhao: In the boiler room Master, Master Mao

Old: He is abducted, that’s not the case

Zhao: Why is this not that?

Old: The toilet is cluttered

Zhao: You are talking nonsense, why is Master Mao his father? Master Mao is just over 1.8 meters tall, you are the only one, he is your father. ?

Old: Ouch, that Baba is Bang Smelly Shiba Yaner, you should know this.

Zhao: You all know Shi Bayin, that woman in our pharmacy, Ouch , you also know Sibayin? She works in our pharmacy.

What does she do? What are you going to do?

Old man: No, he is very angry. You say something and he says something else. Ouch, the voice is so loud. It’s terrible.

The doctor stopped talking.

Zhao: What does this smell like?

Old: Don’t use it even if you say it. I’m so annoyed that people say Zhan Zhan is coming in. This kid is making a mess in the road. It’s hard to leave

Oh, I’m so old, you’re a doctor

Zhao: What are you doing? There are toilets all over the place

Ouch: Bye bye, suanluoluo

Zhao: Ouch, what's wrong? Come to me

Ouch, maybe it's our pharmacy that can catch you here

p>

End