Ask for ten cold jokes of about 50 words.

This story happened in China a long time ago.

I played a guessing game with scissors, stone and cloth all afternoon, my good friends.

Go home together, take a walk …

Si Tong noticed an oil lamp by the roadside, just like Aladdin's magic lamp.

He picked it up curiously and dusted it off.

Suddenly, white smoke came out of the bottle of Ran Ran magic lamp.

A dragon slowly emerged from the white smoke. ..

But the dragon is dry and a little malnourished.

He said, "Who let me out?" Fuzzy

Stone said: I let you out.

Dragon: "Oh … Ahem … Then I can give you a wish …" "

Stone: "Ah ... only one. Oh, there are three. "

Dragon: "I'm sorry ... because I'm a half-toned dragon ... if you don't want to, forget it ..." "

Si Tong: "OK ... and then ... can you make all three of us adults?" We are tired of guessing boxing every day. "

Dragon: "Oh ... I'll try … but maybe only one can succeed … because I'm a semitone dragon …" "

The dragon coughed a few times and spat at the three of them respectively.

The three people gradually began to be shrouded in white smoke, and the dragon gradually disappeared into the three-character sutra.

Wait until the white smoke clears. ...

Stone or stone, scissors or scissors, but cloth is no longer cloth, cloth has successfully transformed into human beings!

When one family is happy and two families are sad,

Someone happened to pass by here and saw this scene.

I recorded him,

This man is Mencius.

He wrote:

…………….

Cloth succeeded and became a man.

Then this statement spread to later generations and was added to Chinese textbooks.

The old man in the family died,

Because of the public sacrifice, the body was frozen.

Please come out after the public sacrifice.

It happened to be hot at that time,

There were thawed water droplets on the body,

Grandson beside to see, very nervous shout loudly:

"Grandma, grandma ... grandpa is sweating ..."

Grandma replied:

"Shh ... Grandpa died for the first time, so nervous! 」

One day, a man met God. ..

God suddenly kindly gave the man a wish.

God asked …

Do you have any wishes …

The man wanted to think. ...

I heard that cats have nine lives. ...

Then please give me nine lives. ..

God said, ..

Your wish has come true. ...

One day, that man was idle and bored …

I want to say die. ...

There are nine lives anyway

Lying on the tracks ...

As a result, a train passed by. ...

That man is still dead ...

Why is this?

Because that train has 10 cars …

A lady met a red light while driving.

The traffic police on the side watched her as the red light turned green and the green light turned red …

Still parked in the middle of the road, not moving.

So the traffic police went over and asked the young lady, "What's the matter, don't you have a favorite color?" 」

Have you been dating her for many years?

There seem to be fewer phones recently.

I feel weak.

Ask her why

She just lowered her head and said nothing. ...

I don't know what to do.

After all ... feelings can't be forced.

Listen to your friends.

She has been close to a man recently.

I can't believe it.

I don't want to believe it either.

Because ... I really like her. ...

But ... that day in the street.

I can't believe I saw her with another him.

Hand in hand

Very intimate joke.

instant

My heart ... is broken. ...

After my inquiry

Only then did I know that he … turned out to be a medical student.

There is also a big hospital at home.

I am a third-rate college student, so I can't compare with it. .....

I have been unable to sleep these days.

Do you still want to save our feelings? .....

I thought about it for a long time.

Decided to send her an apple every day.

because

I believe

"An apple a day keeps the doctor away."

On one night, ...

Xiaoming couldn't sleep, so he decided to go out for a walk …

He just walked on the highway near his home …

Unfortunately, I was caught in a police raid. ...

Xiao Ming was called for questioning.

The policeman asked Xiao Ming why he got on the highway, and gave him a ticket after asking.

It says

1. Not wearing a seat belt

2. Driving without a license

3. The speed is less than 60 miles per hour

This is what I have answered others, and I will copy it to you. There are many, you can choose by yourself. Also, I quite agree with what Oo Xiaodong said, this score is really not so good ~

A group of great scientists played hide-and-seek in heaven after their death. It's Einstein's turn to arrest people. He counted to 100 and opened his eyes. He saw everyone hiding, but Newton was still standing there. Einstein walked over and said, "Newton, I got you." Newton: "No, you didn't catch Newton." Einstein: "You are not Newton. Who are you? " Newton: "What do you see under my feet?" Einstein looked down and saw Newton standing on a square floor tile one meter long and one meter wide, puzzled. Newton: "This is a square meter under my feet, and I stand on it and it is Newton/square meter, so you don't catch Newton, you catch * * *."

…… …… …… ……

pascal

When a boy had sex with a girl, the girl received an offer from Duke University. At the boarding gate of the airport, the girl anxiously looked at the figure of the lady here. But when the familiar body really appeared in front of her, the girl did not dare to look at the attachment in each other's eyes.

"If you let me stay, I will give up studying abroad." The girl secretly made up her mind. I saw that the boy took out a beautifully packaged gift box with a mechanical watch that stopped the needle. The boy gently put the watch on the girl's wrist, wound it up, loosened it, and the stopped watch hand began to circle again.

"Yes, everyone will have a new beginning. Why stick to this moment?" The girl thought about it, shook her hand and walked quickly into the boarding passage. There was no hesitation in her heart, only a glimpse of the sobbing back touched a chord slightly.

Sixty years later, the girl's temples were stained with snow. She was packing at her home in Boston and preparing to move. The American wife outside is coaxing her grandchildren into the car. Suddenly, the mechanical watch at the bottom of the box suddenly appeared in front of her, and the memory suddenly returned to the airport 60 years ago. "Girl" sighed for a while, wiped the surface, wound the watch, let go, and the stopped hands began to circle again. ...

My wife shouted many times outside and didn't hear the response from the "girl". On entering the room, she was holding an old-fashioned tearful eye.

-What does that mean? . . . What the boy wants to express is that the watch is gone. . .

It's freezing! ! !

A man was out on a business trip and suddenly came home. He heard a man snoring at the door.

The man walked away silently and sent a text message to his wife: "Divorce!" ! ! "

Then throw away the mobile phone card and leave. ...

They met again in a city three years later.

The wife asked: Why did you leave without saying goodbye?

The man told the story.

The wife turned around,

Simply put: that's Rising's little lion.

My English teacher always likes to ask questions in class. Whenever someone is asked to answer a question, he always asks: Can you? Means you can.

One day we learned the word born, the meaning of fertility, and then she gave an example: a sow can give birth to ten piglets at a time, and then let a boy translate. After the boy stood up, the teacher did not forget to ask: will you? The boy replied: I won't.

After ten seconds of silence, the whole class laughed.

One night, when I was on duty, someone reported to the police that a drunk was making trouble in front of his shop, so we took him back to the police station and "restrained him until he woke up." When the man arrived at the police station, he was still unconscious and hit his head with his mobile phone. The leader was afraid of an accident, so he put away his mobile phone and put it in the duty room for me to keep.

This is a magical cottage machine. I have a rough look, there are 9 speakers! ! ! This is a terrible thing. Someone has been calling this mobile phone, and the ringtone is "Wolf falls in love with sheep". God, the phone keeps ringing. The ringtone of the mobile phone is at least 100 decibel, so big that even the general sound is covered up. I answered, and the caller is also a drunk and can't communicate. I want to turn off my phone, and I need a password! ! ! I want to wait until his battery is dead. He's been ringing for more than two hours and hasn't used up a grid of electricity! ! !

I thought, well, I pulled the battery out. What a clever mistake! I made the worst decision of my life! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! As soon as the battery is unplugged, this mobile phone actually has an alarm. Yes, it's a siren, louder than the alarm of our police car. Where did you say the battery was missing? It's been ringing for more than ten minutes, so I can't help it. I can only put the battery back, turn it on, and continue to sing Wolf in Love with Sheep.

At 2 o'clock in the morning, the man finally woke up and could communicate normally. I returned his mobile phone to him in tears and told him to leave the police station and let me live.

One day in the street. Walk.

A girl knelt on the ground and cried. Cry until everyone is watching and ask her what's wrong. . .

She said: lost. . . . .

A young man is wearing a white T-shirt. The key point is that there are three bars (Adidas) on the left and right sleeves and a big tick (Nike) on the back. I feel dizzy and my chest is kappa. . . .

One night at around 10, I was on my way home by bike.

Inactive lane

There is a man driving a battery car around.

I think maybe I'm drunk, so I'd better keep my distance.

I was just thinking, suddenly the car in front of me fell down, and so did the people.

I rode past him to see what had happened.

He said to himself, Mara is next door, asleep! ~

At about 9 o'clock in the midsummer night, I was driving across a road. I was surprised to see anonymous sitting on a motorcycle by the side of the road with a intoxicated face, so I kept stirring it up. There was a faint gasp "Oh ... Uh ...". Look carefully, Kao, make love in this street. After a scan, everyone in the car and on the road looks like thunder, which is summarized as follows:

Daughters-