About reading long English jokes?

Jokes are an indispensable part of national culture and social life. They have a wide audience and have been loved by people since ancient times. I'd like to share some English jokes about medium and long stories, hoping to help everyone!

About the long English joke: the silent battle with the Pope

Centuries ago, the Pope ordered all Jews to leave Italy. Of course, this caused a strong protest from the Jewish community, so the Pope proposed a deal. He will have a religious debate with a leader of the Jewish community. If the Jewish leader wins the debate, the Jews will be allowed to stay in Italy. If the Pope wins, the Jews have to leave.

The Jewish community met and chose an elderly rabbi, Moishe, to represent them in the debate. However, Rabbi Moishe can't speak Latin, and neither can the Pope speak Yiddish. So it is decided that this will be a "silent" debate.

On the day of the debate, the Pope and Rabbi Moishe sat face to face for a whole minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers.

Rabbi Moishe looked back and raised a finger.

Next, the Pope waved his fingers around his head.

Rabbi Moishe pointed to where he was sitting.

The Pope then took out a Mujon pancake and a glass of wine.

Rabbi Moishe took out an apple.

At this point, the Pope stood up and said, "I admit this debate. This man beat me. Jews can stay. "

Later, the cardinals gathered around the Pope and asked him what had happened.

The Pope said, "First of all, I hold up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He held out a finger in response, reminding me that there is still only one God between our two religions. Then I waved my finger to show him that God is around us. He pointed to the ground to show that God was with us. I took out wine and pancakes to show that God forgave us our sins. He took out an apple to remind me of my original sin. He has an answer to everything. What can I do? "

Meanwhile, Jews gathered around Rabbi Moishe and asked what had happened.

"Well," said Moishe, "first he said to me,' You Jews have three days to leave here.' So I said to him, "Fuck you". Then he told me that the whole city would be cleared of Jews. So I said to him, listen, Mr. Pope, Jews ... we'll stay here! "

"Then what?" A woman asked.

"Who knows?" Rabbi Moishe said. "We stopped for lunch."

About Chinese and English jokes: Destroy the world.

Noah's Ark ... If it happened today.

The Lord said to Noah, "within six months, I will send rain on the earth until the whole land is flooded and all the wicked are destroyed." But I want to save some good people, two of every living thing on earth. I'm Ding Man. You build an ark. "

In a flash of lightning, he gave the specifications of an ark. "Okay," Noah said, trembling with fear, groping for the blueprint.

"Six months later, it began to rain," God roared. "You'd better build the ark or spend a long time learning to swim."

Six months passed, the sky was overcast and it began to rain. God saw Noah sitting in his front yard crying. ..... and no ark.

"Noah," God shouted, "where is the ark?"

"Lord, please forgive me!" Noah pleaded. "I tried my best. But there is a big problem. First of all, I have to get a building permit for the Ark construction project, and your plan does not conform to the specifications. So I had to hire an engineer to redraw the floor plan. Then I had a big fight about whether the ark needed a fire sprinkler system.

"Then my neighbor objected, claiming that I had violated the zoning plan by building the ark in my front yard, so I had to get a difference from the urban planning task.

"Then I had a problem getting enough wood for the ark, because it was forbidden to cut down trees to save the spotted owl. I must convince American fish and wildlife that I need wood to save owls. But they won't let me catch owls. So, no owls.

"Carpenters formed a trade union and went on strike. Before someone picks up a saw or hammer, I must negotiate with the National Labor Relations Board. Now we have sixteen carpenters on board, but there are still no owls.

"Then I started collecting animals and was sued by an animal rights organization. They objected to my taking only two of each.

"When my lawsuit was dismissed, the Environmental Protection Agency informed me that I could not complete the ark without submitting an environmental impact report on your proposed flood. They don't like the idea that they have no jurisdiction over the behavior of a supreme being.

"Later, the Army Corps of Engineers wanted a map of the proposed new flood plain. I sent them a globe.

"Now, I am still trying to solve the complaints of the Equal Employment Opportunity Organization about how many Croats I should hire. The IRS confiscated all my assets, claiming that I tried to evade taxes by leaving the country. I just got a notice from the state government that I owe them some use tax. I really don't think I can finish the ark in at least five years, "Noah cried."

The sky began to clear up. The sun began to shine. A rainbow spans the sky. Noah looked up and smiled.

"You mean you won't destroy the earth?" Noah asked hopefully.

"No," God said sadly. "The government has already done this."

Chinese for English Jokes: Administrative Recruitment

A successful female supervisor stood in front of the kingdom of heaven, facing St. Peter himself. "Strange," said St. Peter thoughtfully, "we have never had a supervisor do this before. I don't know what to do with you. When I think about it carefully, I will let you experience one day here and one day in hell. "

Therefore, the female executive spent the whole day lying on the clouds, playing the harp, and having a wise and civilized discussion with the great philosophers. Her 24 hours passed quickly, and then she was sent to hell, where the devil took her to a beautiful country club, where she found many of her old friends, dressed fashionably, drank, joked, laughed and had a good time. They talked about the old days, played golf, ate steak and lobster, drank champagne and danced until dawn. Before she knew it, her 24 hours had ended and she had returned to the gate of heaven.

St Peter said, "I have considered your position and decided to let you choose where you want to spend your eternal life."

She just thought for a moment before answering. "Well, heaven is nice, but, no offense, I had a good time in hell." She returned it. But this time she found herself in a desolate wasteland covered with garbage. Her friends are still there, but now they are wearing rags, picking up rubbish and moving from one pile to another.

"Wait a minute," the woman stammered to the devil. "I don't understand. When I was here yesterday, there was a golf course and a country club. We had a good time eating lobster, drinking champagne and dancing all night. Now everyone is burying their heads in shoveling garbage. "

The devil looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting you. Today, you are an employee! "