Seek short ghost stories and jokes

Walking at night, I met two wild ghosts floating on the grave, yelling. The ghost scolded him and said, "What are you shouting? Just taking a walk after dinner. Rare and strange! "

A man died because he didn't want to forget his old life. He didn't drink Meng Po Tang and was sentenced to check after crossing Naihe Bridge. He asked, "Did you have soup?" People lie: "Drink!" Ghost sentenced to sneer: "I remember this clearly, go back and drink!" " "

I live alone in a tall building and will come in the middle of the night. I will tell you that tomorrow night will be exciting, so please bring your own things. The next day, after a long time, the cow's head and horse's face arrived, and people accused: Why are you here? Cow's head and horse's face gasped, the elevator stopped and climbed upstairs.

A tourist went into an old house in the mountains to shelter from the rain. Ghosts were doing harm, which coincided with the strong wind destroying the old house, and both people and ghosts fled. The man asked his chest, which scared me to death! The ghost also asked about his chest, which scared me to death! Monster: What did you die for? The ghost is gone.

A man was very ill and the hospital gave him first aid. After several tossing and turning, everyone was so tired at night that everyone fell asleep. The doctor who got up early shouted, Mom, I overslept and forgot to give him first aid. The nurse woke up: Mom, I overslept and forgot to give him an intravenous drip. Family members also woke up: Mom, how can you still be alive if you don't change the intravenous drip and give first aid all night? I only heard a negative voice: Mom, I overslept and forgot to be heady!

An old man died, and the dutiful son invited a group of monks to cross over, but he had a special order to ask the old man's soul to go to the East. The monk wondered: going to the west is a paradise. The dutiful son replied: My father had better twist his arms and thighs in this life. People say that he leans towards the west. Just read it to the East, and he will go to the West as soon as possible.

One person died, but Heqiao drank Meng Po Tang, and suddenly kissed Meng Po nearly half an hour later. The old woman was ashamed and angry: why tease the old woman? Victim: I wanted to kiss someone before I died, but I forgot who I kissed when I was eating soup just now. Only you.

The singer made many curtain calls before the audience dispersed with satisfaction. The only person who doesn't leave calls himself heady. Why wait? A: You must finish singing.

A professor gave a lecture: It is romanticism to turn a dead person into a butterfly. Being asked to leave by a horse face is classicism. Being cremated is realism. Being frozen and resurrected is surrealism. Besides, you can't imagine me dead, can you? This is ridiculous. ...

After the painter died, his agent always sold new paintings.

One day after drinking, I finally told the truth: "Shh … he is still painting in the studio. I didn't tell him that he was dead. "

When Yise Weng died, his son burned two papery wives and buried them together. He bought a poor paper cheaply.

After a while, Weng had a dream: "stingy, that young lady has skin disease ..."

At the end of the masquerade, the guests took off their disguises as required.

A "mummy" asked someone next to him to help him untie the shroud ... in the end, everyone only saw a pile of shroud.

GREAT GHOST: Tonight we are going to scare people, whoosh, quack, click.

Child: Why do you have a problem with people?

Old ghost: Leave him alone. This guy died of a split personality.

GREAT GHOST: The threat plan didn't work tonight.

Child: It's all you. You don't choose a place to scare people. Why go to the blind massage parlor? ...

Old ghost: Kid, where's the paper money your family burned the other day?

Kidd: GREAT GHOST and I have invested together.

Old ghost: Did you make any money?

kid:…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………”

Child: I won the lottery and can go to heaven for five days!

GREAT GHOST: Fool, angels will tell you that heaven is being decorated.