Crosstalk "Writing Couplets"

The original text of the script is as follows:

Write a couplet

A: Crosstalk actor, I know you have a good culture.

B: Alas, I have no culture.

A: Alas.

B: It’s not much better than being illiterate.

A: That’s not possible.

B: Ah.

A: Oh, there are no illiterates now.

B: Alas, yes.

A: Still have to study hard.

B: Yes.

A: Everyone must reach the high school level.

B: Alas.

A: I have a bachelor’s degree, a junior college degree, a bachelor’s degree!

B: Who is it?

A: Undergraduate degree! Really. I don’t understand, you don’t understand!

B: Undergraduate degree?

A: Well, I graduated from college.

B: You. . . Have you graduated from college?

A: Alas. Right, right.

B: Oops. you. . . you. . .

A: Hehe, you are the only one who always looks down on me. I'm respected everywhere I go.

B: Yo, ho!

A: Huh? Oops. Do you know that Huayuan Street in Nanshi a few days ago?

B: Ah.

A: Huayuan Street Youth Store opens, ribbon cutting, please, please me!

B: What do you want me to do?

A: Oh, ask me, let me write, let me make up a couplet.

B: Hey!

A: Shop!

B: Huh?

A: Opening!

B: Huh?

A: Let me make up a pair. The manager personally picked me up at home. Listen to this couple, look at what I made up, the words I made up.

B: Hmm. Can't be wrong.

A: Remember it, remember it. The first couplet.

B: Hmm.

A: (Slowly and solemnly) Business is booming all over the world.

B: (Long tone, mockingly) Hmm.

A: How is it?

B: OK!

A: This. . . This is the first couplet.

B: Really good.

A: Alas.

B: The second couplet is: Rich wealth reaches Sanjiang, right? (Seeing that A didn’t respond, he continued to ask) Really?

A: Huh?

B: Huh?

A: Alas, alas, alas, did you read this couplet the day I wrote it?

B: Who watched it? Never seen it!

A: How did you remember the words?

B: Do I remember?

A: I made up this word. . . . . .

B: What a pair you have,

A: Huh?

B: In the year when there was a dog, there was this pair. ah. Where did you copy it? where. . . Where did you find this old door frame when demolishing the house? I copied the words down. ah? Can you come here? ! Look at this blow! Big talk! So good, so good, after a long time of recovery, "business is booming all over the world"? In front of you. . .

A: You. . . . . . You ask the question! I'll make up a word for you! I'll make up a couple for you to listen to! You don’t accept “Ma University of Science and Technology”!

B: That works! That shows you are knowledgeable!

A: Tell me!

B: Let me tell you something. . . . . . topic?

A: Huh?

B: You want to write a pair and it will be yours?

A: Forget it, forget it, I want to be speechless——

B: Huh?

A: Look, I can’t make up any words

B: How about it?

A: I was——

B: Huh?

A: Give you a dime!

B: Hi!

A: Alas.

B: Why do I need a dime from you? !

A: Me. . . I only have a dime.

B: Hey, how miserable!

A: (Imitating a child) Our family doesn’t let me bring more money.

B: You are obedient.

A: Ah.

B: Take it with you, don’t lose it!

A: Let me buy sesame seed cakes when I’m hungry.

B: Yes?

A: (squeaking) Yeah.

B: Even if I buy pancakes, I won’t sell them to you.

A: Yeah.

B: Alas. explain! I'll choose a topic for you.

A: OK, just say it.

B: Don’t move, just write a couplet to the Youth Store.

A: Shop, okay, that’s an easy word to make up!

B: Come on!

A: This word is easy to make up. Shanglianer, listen!

B: Listen.

A: "Don't be tired of asking questions, never tire of learning, stick to your job;"

B: Okay, that's good.

A: This is the first couplet.

B: Okay.

A: Hmm.

B: Second couplet?

A: "Whether you want to buy it or exchange it, you can be praised by customers."

B: Hey! good.

A: How is it?

B: Okay. high. Horizontal batch?

A: Huh?

B: Horizontal batch?

A: Horizontal criticism? Four words of horizontal criticism!

B: Hmm.

A: "Making a fortune!"

B: This sentence is almost right.

A: What?

B: This is close. An old word.

A: Huh?

B: Make a fortune? No.

A: Huh? how?

B: An old word.

A: Where does Dafa’s “talent” come from? ! Discover talents! Discover talents and use them! Cultivate young people who can do business, make business work, make great use of talents, utilize people, and make great wealth!

B: Oh.

A: How is it?

B: Such a "big development of talent?"

A: Oh, by the way, cultivate personnel. Make a deal and get the deal done.

B: Oh, let’s put it this way.

A: "Great talent!"

B: Well, then write a couplet to the waiter.

A: Waiter, waiter too!

B: Write.

A: Young businessman, "Coming in will make you feel better;"

B: That's right, you have a good professional attitude.

A: Alas.

B: Second couplet?

A: "Go out and I hope you will be satisfied!"

B: Alas, I bought something I wanted.

A: Alas.

B: Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao?

B: Huh?

A: "Good news!"

B: Well, it's an old saying again!

A: Alas. this. . . !

"B:: The good news is three yuan, leading the way."

A: You posted the good news, you are praised! Cook, waiter, salesperson - happy news for the three "employees"! Judge awards, win awards, and receive praise.

B: Such a good news three "members"?

A: Advanced worker.

B: (Suddenly enlightened) Hmm.

A: Good news for three members!

B: Success, success!

A: Ah——. (rising tone)

B: Alas, I will choose a fresh one for you.

A: Huh?

B: Now we are in Nanshi.

A: Huh?

B: Food street.

A: Food street, what?

B: Please write a couplet.

A: OK, to be honest, it’s ready!

B: Ready-made.

A: Listen to this couplet!

B: Ah.

A: "A food street, (B: Alas.) Beautiful architecture, new style;"

B: Alas. Second couplet?

A: "There are thousands of kinds of delicacies, complete equipment, and antique flavor."

B: Hey! Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao? Horizontal batch? "Blessings are before our eyes!"

B: "Blessings are before our eyes"?

A: Are you lucky with words? !

B: Huh?

A: The delicious food is right in front of you, Nanshi Food Street, what do you want to eat? You see, Northern and Southern dishes, Manchu and Han banquets, whole sheep dishes, snacks and snacks.

B: Alas.

A: Eat it! Just eat. . . It’s a blessing to be able to eat!

B: Alas.

A: Good for your health!

B: Hey! The subway has been repaired!

A: Subway, subway.

B: West Station to Dayingmen.

A: OK.

B: Look how good this is!

A: The subway?

B: Ah.

A: Listen to this couplet!

B: Ah.

A: "The radio wave that never disappears, the tunnel station;"

B: Huh?

A: As for the subway, there is no power outage.

B: Ah.

A: It’s an underground station. You can get on or off at any station you want.

B: Alas.

A: "The radio wave will never disappear, the tunnel station;"

B: The second couplet?

A: The second couplet? "How to make steel, Chaoyanggou."

B: Yes. Inseparable from steel.

A: Yes.

B: Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao?

B: Huh?

A: Is this horizontal criticism?

B: Huh?

A: Hengpi also has some auspicious words!

B: Lucky words? Listen.

A: "Peace in all seasons"!

B: Okay! Siji Ping'an got on the subway here?

A: By the way, peace all seasons.

B: What?

A: It’s not cold in winter, not hot in summer, it’s not windy or rainy, it’s safe to drive, and there’s no emergency brake.

B: Alas.

A: "Peace all seasons!"

B: Huh?

A: Ah, see, right?

B: Please write a couplet for Haihe Park.

A: Yes.

B: Huh?

A: Haihe Park?

B: Alas.

A: Listen to this couplet.

B: Ah.

A: "I think back then, both sides of the Haihe River were dilapidated and old;"

B: Yes, they were dirty, smelly and smelly.

A: Alas.

B: Second couplet?

A: "Look at today, Zhang Zizhong Road has a completely new look."

B: Hey! Horizontal batch?

A: "Blessed as the East Sea"!

B: Well, I am as blessed as the East Sea.

A: The Haihe River flows from Dongbu Bridge and flows into the East China Sea. It is as blessed as the East China Sea! How about it?

B: Alas, please write something for this fountain!

A: Square?

B: Ah.

A: OK.

B: Fountain.

A: "The new look of the square flower bed;"

B: Hey! Second couplet?

A: "The night view of the pool and fountain shines!"

B: Okay. Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao?

B: Hengbiao, auspicious words!

A: Hengbiao, auspicious words. "Good weather"!

B: I’ll catch another one for you.

A: Ah, okay.

B: Write a couplet for the theater.

A: To the theater?

B: Ah, theater.

A: Theater, right?

B: Yes, yes, that’s it.

A: OK. Listen to this couplet!

B: Ah.

A: "The theater also plays movies and Peking opera."

B: Oh, okay. All of them. Second couplet?

A: "In the entertainment venue, there are folk arts and singing."

B: Alas. Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao? "Peace in the world"!

B: Well, how can the world be peaceful?

A: What’s wrong! Public security and fire fighters come down every day to check on the department to see if the spectators are safe or not.

B: Alas.

A: "The world is at peace"!

B: Check whether it is safe or not. You write something for the audience!

A: To the audience?

B: Hahaha.

A: To the audience?

B: Alas. Did you mention the audience?

A: This. . . This needs to be considered!

B: What are you considering? What are the considerations for this?

A: Don’t be busy, don’t be busy.

B: Don’t you have words whenever you open your mouth?

A: Audience. . . Listen to this couplet.

B: Alas.

A: (clears throat) "Watching the show makes me feel happy;"

B: Yes. My heart is happy.

A: Alas.

B: Second couplet?

A: "Listening to cross talk can prolong your life."

B: Hey! Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao? "Family Fun"!

B: How to have fun as a family?

A: Well, after listening to the cross talk, I had a good laugh. The more I thought about it when I got home, the more joyful it became. The whole family laughed and laughed.

B: Alas.

A: "Happy family!"

B: Yes, yes.

A: Do you see?

B: Oh. You write a couplet for you.

A: Huh?

B: You.

A: Me?

B: Alas.

A: Me

B: Alas.

A: Me. . . Can I make a pair myself?

B: Yes, give yourself a couple.

A: Huh?

B: Let me see how you write it?

A: Don’t be busy, what’s wrong?

B: No words?

A: Are you a pair?

B: Alas.

A: "Brothers twelve, I will go seven."

B: Second couplet?

A: "Push down four, six and twenty-one."

B: What is your name? ! Upper and lower couplets.

A: Alas.

B: It’s a mess.

A: This is me!

B: Huh?

A: "Brother twelve, I will do seven"

B: How do you say it?

A: Zi, Chou, Yin, Mao, Chen, Si, Wu.

B: Huh?

A: Wu Ma.

B: Ah.

A: "Brother twelve, I will do seven"

B: Oh. Wu Ma.

A: Alas.

B: How to "push down four six twenty-one"?

A: Yes, four, six, twenty-four.

B: Ah.

A: Four, six and twenty-four, twenty-one were knocked down, and three are still standing.

B: Hmm.

A: Ma Sanli.

B: (To the audience) Look! Hey hey hey hey, good! !

A: Alas.

B: Horizontal batch?

A: Hengbiao?

B: Hmm.

A: The horizontal comment is: "Longevity and health"!

B: Isn’t this the same as “longevity and health”? !

A: Alas.

Slender and thin, already half-toned!

B: Hi! Such a stall

A: It’s already half-cooked, it’s over now, it’s almost over!

B: As long as you write well, write one for me.

A: It would be even better if I wrote one for you!

B: Huh?

A: Let me give you another couplet.

B: Oh, wait a minute.

A: Listen.

B: Give me a pair. I have a question!

A: What topic?

B: The title is cross talk.

A: Crosstalk?

B: Alas, two words.

A: Crosstalk as the title?

B: Alas, the first couplet contains the character "xiang".

A: Xiangzier.

B: The second couplet has a consonant character.

A: Yes. The first couplet!

B: Alas.

A: "The appearance is disgusting, but the popularity (son) is good."

B: The second couplet?

A: "The sound is unpleasant, but the audience welcomes it."

B: Huh? Hengbiao can get auspicious words.

A: Yes.

B: Let me listen.

A: Hengbiao?

B: Ah.

A: Which floor do you live on? You guys, do you live downstairs or upstairs?

B: Oh, no, no.

A: You are at home. . . .

B: I understand, I understand that you are criticizing, "step by step, climbing higher", right? No.

A: Well, which floor is it on?

B: I don’t live in a building.

A: You don’t live in a building, but in a bungalow? I know, bungalow!

B: Bungalow?

A: Ah.

B: "Peace and happiness?" Maybe. "Peace and celebration"? I don't live in a bungalow.

A: I know you don’t live in a bungalow.

B: Yeah.

A: You!

B: Ah.

A: You sit in the house in heaven every day.

B: Ah, "the house is full of gold and jade", haha, the house is full of gold and jade?

A: Aren’t you sitting in the room?

B: Sitting in the main room, "the hall is full of gold and jade"? No.

A: You are in the yard, you stay in the yard!

B: "The courtyard is full of brilliance"? This won't work.

A: Aren’t you staying in the yard?

B: I’m not in the yard!

A: In the house?

B: "The spring breeze fills the courtyard"?

A: Then you go out? !

B: Shall I go out? "Going out to meet someone happy"? There is no such thing, don’t go out!

A: We must be together. Where do you think you will stay?

B: Hey, where can I stay? !

A: You have to have a place!

B: Of course there is a place!

A: Hmm.

B: Me?

A: Hmm.

B: I’m squatting behind the door at the crack of the door!

A: Are you squatting at the crack of the door?

B: Alas. hey-hey!

A: There is a horizontal batch!

B: What?

A: "Fat Pig Arch"!

B: Me? !

(End)