People with high emotional intelligence are unreasonable.

There is such a story in Zhihu:

A friend opened a restaurant. One day, he accidentally opened the door of a private room and found that the guest had checked out, but a young waiter was eating leftovers.

At the moment when the door was pushed open, the waiter also found the boss.

Friends can immediately reprimand employees for rectifying discipline, on the grounds that it wastes time and affects the image of the restaurant.

But my friend said: Give me a pair of chopsticks, too, and others didn't eat them. Cleaning them up is a waste.

Now the waiter is still working in a friend's shop, working hard, and has been promoted to the company foreman.

The same is to make employees work hard, but the boss in the story chose an unreasonable method to take care of the employees' greatest feelings and achieved an unreasonable effect.

The boss's high emotional intelligence has been praised by netizens. It turns out that bosses with high emotional intelligence don't reason with employees.

In the early days of Huawei's establishment, Ren suffered from the inability to turn over funds and operating income, so he put all his net worth into the last fight.

He said to the staff: If this project fails, you can start from another place and I will jump off the building!

Another year later, Ren visited a foreign supplier as promised, but people around him advised him not to go because that country was fighting a temporary war.

My employees are in a war zone, Ren said. As a boss, I can't be with them, which is my biggest dereliction of duty.

As we all know, Huawei has distributed all its shares to its employees. Ren Zheng Fei himself is only about 1%. Huawei pays high salaries to overseas employees, and domestic employees are not jealous at all. Although the salary is low, I am my own boss, and the dividends at the end of the year add up to nothing.

Facts have proved that the best way to mobilize the enthusiasm of employees and retain their hearts is to take the lead in doing everything for the cause and share joys and sorrows with employees.

So bosses with high emotional intelligence don't reason with employees.

02

Lovers with high emotional intelligence are also unreasonable.

A friend said that after giving birth to a baby that year, she was lying in bed exhausted and depressed because of pregnancy and childbirth.

Her husband said happily, "Wife, breast-feeding the baby is good for our physical and mental health."

"Not good! Breastfeeding is not good for my health. "

Her husband added, "Then we will give the children milk powder."

"no! That's not good for children's physical and mental health. You want to alienate me and my children's feelings ... "

"I don't understand, women are so troublesome." Her husband whispered.

"Listen, I know you've changed your mind and don't like me." The friend said with tears.

My queen, goddess, no, fairy. The husband apologized and wiped his tears with paper.

"I know the goddess is not feeling well today. I am using the topic to divert your attention and relieve the pain. "

"Then you should have stopped talking."

"Haha, I'm going to wash diapers."

My friend told me that in fact, she really wanted to tell that stupid man why she had to talk to her so much and why she used such innocent eyes.

All she wanted at that time was a hug, just like when she was in love. She's just afraid of being a mother.

It turns out that lovers with high emotional intelligence are unreasonable and are all talking about love.

Jiang Yang mentioned in The Three of Us that Qian Zhongshu was a clumsy fool who did many "bad things" during the birth of Jiang Yang.

Knocked over the ink bottle and dyed the landlord's tablecloth red; Broke the desk lamp; The door shaft is broken, and one of the goal kick at both ends of the door shaft has fallen off, so the door can't be closed. ...

At this time, Jiang Yang never complained about "how can you be so stupid" or reasoned that "men should undertake these housework ..."?

She just said, "Never mind, I'll fix it."

The phrase "I can repair" contains a person's tender feelings all his life, which can make her ignore his carelessness, ignore his carelessness, or not emphasize with him the truth that the world attaches great importance to.

Some people say that this is the power of love, but it is not. This is the performance of high emotional intelligence.

In the world of mutual concern, people with high emotional intelligence think that reason is the most useless moan.

They don't make sense at all, and they don't discuss what is good or bad, because they don't intend to be debaters all their lives, they just want to be together all their lives.

Therefore, lovers with high emotional intelligence do not reason with each other, but only talk about love.

03

Parents with high emotional intelligence also believe in irrationality.

There is a joke on Weibo:

A mother and son are on the subway. The little boy felt a little bored and took out snacks to enjoy. His mother looked at him and did not stop him. She said she had to answer a question before having dinner with him and asked:

"There are three sheep on the subway, and a wolf came halfway. How many sheep are there?"

"There are no sheep, because the sheep were eaten by wolves, and everyone knows it!"

"no! There are three sheep, because you can't eat on the subway! "

The little boy looked at his snacks and put them back in his schoolbag.

Parents with high emotional intelligence often don't say "no" directly when criticizing their children's misconduct.

But through the guidance of language or behavior, let children think positively and make changes.

In fact, guiding children's consciousness has always been a great way of education. Only in this way can he think positively about why he can't do something and why he should do it.

A few days ago, the college entrance examination was released, and Yang Chenyu of Guangxi set the highest score in Guangxi Province since the resumption of the college entrance examination, and achieved double full marks in English and mathematics.

Ms. Yang said in an interview that it is necessary to supervise children to form a habit when they have no independent thinking ability. More importantly, parents should also be self-disciplined and guide their children's behavior with actions.

I believe that parents want their children to be self-disciplined and think independently, so that they can become what others call "other people's children". However, some people only make sense and stay in their mouths, while others not only say so, but also do so.

Dayu's flood control tells the world a truth: "guiding" can solve floods better than "blocking"

In fact, educating children is the same. Every truth we say is like a stone that stops water. Only when parents guide their children in time with actions can the stone of truth become a dam.

Otherwise, the "reasonable" stone wall will be mercilessly submerged by the flood without direction.

Parents with high emotional intelligence are not "unreasonable", but put the truth into action, guide their children with words and deeds, and put an end to empty talk about truth.

04

In life, in many situations, people with high emotional intelligence are unreasonable, because they know what the solution to the problem is and what the result they want.

Bosses want their employees to be practical and willing to work, so bosses with high emotional intelligence will not preach to employees, but lead by example and share joys and sorrows.

Lovers want love to last forever, so lovers with high emotional intelligence will not talk about fairness and justice with each other. They only talk about love.

Parents want their children to grow up healthily, so parents with high emotional intelligence will not talk nonsense with their children, but give priority to guidance.

Someone once asked, why can't I live this life after learning so much?

It's actually wrong. Most people don't know too much, but talk too much and do too little.

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About the author: Wenshan, a book reviewer who loves to write stories, sometimes talks about life in Kan Kan news, without poison or spit.