The coldest joke in history,

1. Once upon a time, there was a great warrior. His sword is cold, his hands are cold and his heart is cold. . . He was frozen stiff.

2. Once upon a time, there was a lamb. One day, he went out to play and met a wolf. The wolf said, "I will eat you!" " ! ! "Guess what? As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

Xiaoying asked Xiaoming to borrow a pencil. Xiaoming said, "Will you die if you borrow it?" Later Xiao Ming lent it to her. Later, Xiaoming died. ...

The customer was surprised and said, "Your thumb is soaked in my soup." The waiter said, "Nothing, I'm used to it. Not hot. "

5. Look at the fill-in-the-blank questions in a group of Chinese test papers-1. When * * * is cutting candles at the west window, _ _ _ Classmate A: Husband and wife sit in the morning (the Chinese teacher laughs when marking papers. After class, I fainted again! The correct solution is "late rain time") 2. Mayflies shake trees, and _ _ students answer: don't move (the correct answer is "ridiculous". Quietly, wonderful, very in line with the facts. ) 3. The beauty of a gentleman's adult, _ _ _ Student A: The villain is favored (directly fainting). 4. The poor are alone, _ _ _ Student A: The rich have wives and concubines (positive solution: reaching the top to help the world). 5. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ Student A: Iron bars can also be ground into needles ~ ~ (I guess it's not as simple as grinding into needles) (the correct solution is "but his love for 3,000 is concentrated on one person") 7. Although my body doesn't have bright phoenix wings, Student A: It's better to pull a chicken than a phoenix, and another student A: Both husband and wife go home (the correct saying is "However, I feel the harmonious heartbeat of the sacred unicorn") 8. Sunrise in the east and rain in the west. _ _ _ Classmate A: There is another classmate fighting at the end of the bed. Answer: I got on the wrong sedan chair and married the right person. 9. Egrets fly in front of Mount Cisse. _ _ Classmate A: Climbing turtle by the river in Dongcun (right) 10. I suggest that god stand up again. _ _ _ Classmate A: God yelled at me three times. (The positive solution is "If the moon is long and round, I don't hate it", and Li He's "Ode to the Golden Copper Immortal Han") (There is also a saying that "the right way on earth is vicissitudes") 1 1. If relatives and friends in Luoyang ask, please don't tell him (the correct solution is "a piece of ice heart in a jade pot"). The first part is the hero of the work. Part two of junior high school students is: The old lady is full of charm, especially 13. No one has died since ancient times. _ _ Student A: Only those who are dead have priority (ending: the teacher stays to talk to the birds after the parent-teacher meeting ...) 14. So the foot of my bed is bright. _ _ Student A: The smell of Li Bai sleeping is 15. Look into the pipe. Positive solution "visible") 16. _ _ _ _ _, representative work of pedestrians trying to kill junior high school students: ghost knocking at the door in the middle of the night 17. Another time I took an examination of Tao Yuanming's "Five Doors of Rice Can't Bend", and my classmates filled in "Just give me six Doors" …17. I hate using this book. _ _ _ _ Classmate A: If people fall in love, they will die young (the positive solution is "if they don't hate, they will grow longer") 19. No one has died in life since ancient times. _ _ Classmate A: Who has a stool without paper (speechless ...) 20. I once tested Li Qingzhao's dream sequence "Do you know? Do you know that?/You know what? _ _ _ "The student replied: Sorry, I DONT't know ... (The correct answer is" green manure, red skinny ") 2 1. I once tested a sentence of Lu Xun: "_ _, I spilled my blood on Xuanyuan." The classmate replied: He stabbed me with his knife. 22. In the Chinese exam, there is a revolutionary poem in the blank: "People go in and out. 23. There is always love in Qian Shan. _ _ Student A: Can I have one more? The teacher approved a sentence: love is love, points are points, and giving more than one is not enough. 24. Ask yourself how worried you can be. _ _ Student A: Like a pot of Erguotou (the teacher criticized "You drank too much again ...")