Funny joke: Drinking wine from a bottle is not a skill, but drinking wine from an empty bottle is a skill.

1.

? Seeing my father getting thinner and thinner, I said, you can start quitting smoking. Quitting smoking is good for your health. You are in good health and we, our sons, are working outside. Worry less.

? Son of a turtle, you don’t care about my father’s hobby. You asked me to quit smoking and I can’t even lift an ax (my father is a carpenter). How can I maintain this family? You scream every day. I quit. I have been working outside for so many years without sending back a dime, Dad said. Every time I think of my dad saying that I can no longer lift the ax to quit smoking, I want to laugh.

2.

I was riding a bicycle at a corner when I was suddenly stopped by a girl. I thought she was asking for directions, so I stopped and asked her what happened. She said that she came from out of town, and all her money was stolen by thieves. Now she is starving to death. Can you give her five yuan to buy a bowl of hot and sour noodles? I said there is a steamed bun shop in front of you, and I will take you to eat steamed buns (the steamed buns cost one yuan each). I thought to myself, if I want to eat hot and sour noodles, I am usually reluctant to buy them, so it would be nice to treat you to a steamed bun. But she said that the steamed buns were not delicious and I just wanted to eat a bowl of hot and sour noodles. snort! You still think it's ugly, so I said, I'm too lazy for you, so I got on the car and left!

3.

The rich man asked the long-term worker to take the empty bottle to get some wine. The long-term worker said, how can you get the wine if you don’t give me money? The rich man said that using money to buy drinks is nothing. The long-term worker took the empty bottle angrily and came back after a long time. The rich man looked at the bottle and said loudly, "Where is the wine I asked you to drink?" The long-term worker said calmly that drinking wine from a bottle is not a skill, but drinking wine from an empty bottle is a skill.

4.

My friend said to me, Xiao Lu, let me tell you, I have successfully given up drinking. I said I've been quitting drinking for a few days. Why haven't I heard you mention it before? My friend said that I had only given up drinking for one day. I said, what’s the point of being proud of after only one day? My friend said, "You don't drink, so how do you know the pain I feel when I drink? You know, I usually drink wine three times a day, including every meal." It’s not that your sister-in-law is clamoring for me to quit drinking every day, even if you beat me to death, you don’t know how uncomfortable it is to quit drinking. I said, do you want to have a couple of drinks to celebrate that you successfully stopped drinking this time. My friend said, Shhh! Keep your voice down, don't let your sister-in-law know.