14. 13 Zi asked his uncle in Jia: "Believe it or not, don't tell me, laugh it off or accept it?"

14. 13 Zi asked his uncle in Jia: "Believe it or not, don't tell me, laugh it off or accept it?" Jia said to him, "Take the plaintiff as an excuse. When the master talks, people never tire of it; Laugh and laugh again, and people never tire of laughing; Righteousness is taken, and people are not tired of taking it. " Confucius said, "What is it?"

Confucius asked Gong about his uncle: "Really? I heard that his old man doesn't talk, laugh or make a profit? " Gong Mingjia replied, "The messenger talked too much. His old man's house is not silent, but only speaks when it is time to speak, so people don't hate his words; It's not that I don't laugh, I just laugh when I'm happy, so people don't hate his smile; It's not that you don't take profits, you want to take profits, so people don't hate him for taking profits. "

Uncle Wen Zi is a famous defense minister. Confucius once said: "A gentleman is more self-controlled, and there is no suffering."

Confucius said, "What is it?" As it is, it is beautiful; Whether it is true or not, I doubt it is true. It's great that he can do this! Can he really do it? Confucius still didn't quite believe it.

Good Morning, everyone! Give a speech at night and realize your dream! Writing plus sign

Words grow seven times faster! The more you give, the more you get.

It's half past six again, so we should continue to study the Analects of Confucius. As usual, let's review what we learned yesterday, chapter 12 of the constitutional title of the Analects of Confucius.

Luz asked an adult. Confucius said, "If Zang Wuzhong knows what people don't want, he can be an adult with the courage of frontier village and the skills of Ran Qiu." Yue: "What is the necessity of being an adult today? When you see what you want, you can fight with your life. If you don't forget the words for a long time, you can become an adult. "

What do you mean? That is to say, adults are virtuous people, equivalent to perfect people, or comprehensive, comprehensive and perfect people.

Lutz asked the teacher, what is the perfect standard? Confucius replied.

He was unreasonable and gave an example directly, saying that if a person can have Zang Wuzhong's wisdom, we talked about Zang Wuzhong's wisdom earlier. There is also Meng Gong's unwillingness to be honest and greedy, which is Bian Zhuangzi's courage and courage. Yesterday we also talked about Bian Zhuangzi's bravery. Bian Zhuangzi stabbed a tiger, and he had run away many times before. Later, after his mother died, he fought bravely many times, captured the enemy leader, and finally died in battle.

There must be Ran Qiu's versatility. We already know a lot about Ran Qiu, that is, You Ran. That's not enough. You have to add ceremony and music, practice ceremony and music, and you can barely be a perfect person.

It can be seen that Confucius has very high requirements and definitions for whether a person is perfect or not. After that, he also found it too difficult. At the same time, he has so many virtues as a gentleman, and he has manners and music, so he settled for the second best, adding that today we don't have to demand so much from perfect people and adults.

If you can do the following three things, you can do it. What three things? They are:

1 Obviously. That is, when you see the benefits, you can think about whether it is reasonable, reasonable and legal, that is, whether I should not take ill-gotten gains, whether I will take them if there are benefits, whether I should take them or not. There are principles.

If you are in danger, you can give your life if you see danger. People will say, why give your life? In the case of right and wrong, it is not simple to dare to sacrifice one's life to defend justice.

The third is to remember the words of your life for a long time. If you say yes, it means that no matter how long it has passed, you can remember your oath and carry it out.

This is equivalent to our determination and long-term ambition, not to say that we are finished. It's no use saying today and forgetting tomorrow.

If you can do these three things, you can be said to be a perfect person.

We also compare, how far are we from adults?

Well, after a brief review, we will focus on the new content we are going to learn today. It can be said that the entire Analects of Confucius was asked by others, and few Confucius inquired about others like others.

Today this chapter breaks the precedent, so what's going on? Let's look at the original text first.

The son asked his uncle in Jia: "Do you believe it or not, the master didn't say anything and laughed it off?" Jia said to him, "Take the plaintiff as an excuse. When the master talks, people never tire of it; Laugh and laugh again, and people never tire of laughing; Righteousness is taken, and people are not tired of taking it. " Confucius said, "What is it?"

First, let me tell you something about Confucius. Now when we talk about Confucius, we often mention Kong Old Master Q, which is our honorific title for Confucius and can basically be regarded as his special title.

In fact, in the era of Confucius, Confucius was a respectful name, and the language used when he was very respectful to others was equivalent to what we now call a gentleman. This gentleman is not the gentleman we greeted, Mr. Zhang and Mr. Li, no! But a respected man is a gentleman. For example, we call Mr Soong Ching Ling and Mr Jiang Yang, and transcending gender is our greatest respect for him.

Confucius also had people he respected at that time. Uncle Wen Zi is one of them. He is called a master, which is a respect for him.

Secondly, let's introduce Uncle Wen Zi again, otherwise we don't know what's going on.

Uncle Wen Zi, the word Gongsun Ba, posthumous title's practice, uncle Wen Zi of posthumous title. He was a great doctor of Wei in the Spring and Autumn Period, a grandson, and pursued nobility.

In 3 1 year, that is, in 504 BC, Lu attacked Zheng and occupied Kuang Shi. Instead of borrowing soldiers from Wei Guo, when he returned home, Yang Hucheng let Lu, Ji and Meng enter directly from the south gate of Wei Guo's capital and leave from the east gate. Wei Linggong was furious and sent Zixia Mi after him. At that time, Uncle Wen Zi was old, so he was kicked out? To exhort, don't destroy the intimate relationship between Lu and Wei because of a little anger, and predict that Yanghu will be doomed to self-destruction.

Wei Linggong accepted his suggestion and stopped pursuing. This man, rich but not proud, was good at recommending talents and enjoyed a high reputation among the vassal States at that time.

There is a special story about his recommendation of talents later, so I won't say it here.

When Confucius traveled around the world, he lived in Weiguo for the longest time. He spoke highly of his uncle Wen Zi.

After that, let's talk about Jia. He is also a patriotic man and a patriotic doctor.

It is Uncle Wen Zi who has great prestige in society and influence in politics. Everyone says that he is excellent. Uncle Wen Zi doesn't speak casually at ordinary times, but a word is quite weighty, and he doesn't talk about other people's right and wrong, and he doesn't laugh easily or be greedy. Is it true?/You don't say. To test the rumor.

Everyone here should remember that Confucius did not mean that Uncle Wen Zi was dumb, unable to laugh or have emotional intelligence. Absolutely not. It's just that he's not easy to talk or laugh.

Gong Mingjia replied to Confucius: The rumor is a bit excessive, but it is not like what everyone said. He was described so well by others. What can he do? It is that his speech can grasp the time, not nonsense, just right. So, people don't hate his words, this is the first one.

The second is that he is happy, happy and smiling, that is, he should laugh when he should, but not when he shouldn't. If he smiles properly, others will not hate his smile.

The third is about taking. If you give him a gift reasonably, he can accept it appropriately instead of taking nothing. He doesn't flaunt his lofty.

I believe that after listening to Gong Mingjia's explanation, all the comrades felt that Uncle Wen Zi was really not simple. What he can do is just right, and he has principles and won't go too far. In fact, it is equivalent to the golden mean that Confucius said, and it is just right to do things.

Confucius listened to this explanation and said, "Is it true?"

Is it true?/You don't say. /You don't say. There is a little doubt! Then why doubt it? This may be because Uncle Wen Zi has a little problem in history, so what's the problem? It's not clear yet. In a word, Confucius basically believed, but he didn't completely believe. He approached the problem with doubts.

In fact, it also tells us that people should have independent thinking, not what others say, so he still needs verification, that is, he still has his own independent judgment after verification.

An example of this is Bai Juyi, who once wrote a poem called:

In the days of the Duke of Zhou, he was afraid of gossip, and he was respectful to the throne before Wang Mang usurped the throne.

When Shi Xiang died physically, who knew the truth of his life?

The story I told you is that when the Duke of Zhou was in power, many people thought that the Duke of Zhou wanted to kill his nephew and become king himself. Did he do that? Don't!

Duke Zhou just tried his best to help. Zhou Chengwang, assisted as an adult, was able to handle things independently, still took power as a king, and did nothing out of line.

Before Wang Mang usurped the throne, everyone said he was good. He really looked like a modest gentleman. At that time, everyone had a reputation as a little saint, but the usurped throne finally exposed his true colors and realized that this was not the case.

Therefore, we can't judge a person by his performance at that time, but by his coffin, and then we can know what kind of person he is. Some people even say that it will take three to five decades and a hundred years to truly make a comprehensive evaluation of him.

At this point, let's specifically discuss the importance of Jia's interpretation of Gongshu.

The first one is talking.

I think everyone knows the importance of speaking. Saying things you shouldn't say will be annoying. Talk big, don't know what to say, don't know what the other person is thinking, just talk, that is definitely not enough. No matter how eloquent you are, others will not listen to you, so the importance of speaking is highlighted.

However, if you don't say what you should say and others don't know what you think, you can't reach you. If communication is not in place, it will be difficult to reach an agreement, and problems will easily occur in work and life. It's easy to blame each other afterwards. You know, why don't you say so? You didn't say it until afterwards, you are not authentic! He will be disgusted, so it is really important to speak, and it is not easy to grasp the discretion of speaking.

Regarding the importance of speaking, I will be the first person to speak after a while, so I won't say much here.

The second is to laugh and then laugh, and people can't get tired of laughing.

Laugh when you should, and don't laugh when you shouldn't, so his smile is just right and everyone else likes it.

Here is an example for everyone. For example, if you see a person slipping in the street on a rainy day, what will others think if you laugh! It is not authentic to say that you are making fun of people, gloating and hitting people when they are down.

Therefore, this smile also has a scene. When it's your turn to laugh, for example, in our group, I shared a story that was praised and won a prize at the calligraphy training camp yesterday. If everyone laughs, I will feel very happy.

For example, if I share the achievements of Yan Ai, Xia Xia and Qiu Yan, everyone will smile and express their happiness. This is very appropriate. Congratulate others on their happiness. This is when you smile and others will be very happy. This is called timeliness.

Don't make a fool of yourself when others are in trouble. What will others think if you laugh again? So we should laugh, but we should also talk about occasions.

Let me talk about Japan again. They were the same before. Basically, the whole people have one characteristic. If you see others laughing easily, you will wonder what you mean. Are you laughing at me?

Once the Japanese dealt with foreigners. In the early days, because of westerners, people would laugh at each other and be polite. But the Japanese are different. They always suspect that they are laughing at themselves.

Later, through in-depth communication, it was found that this was not the case. This is someone else's habit. These big companies only organized training later to tell everyone that westerners are like this, and we have to adapt before we can change. This shows that this national culture is also very important.

The third is to take justice before taking it, and people never tire of it.

This is the same as what we just said about not taking ill-gotten gains. What is the point here? He doesn't flaunt lofty, but insists on being so principled. I don't take it at all, and I don't want it.

No, but it can be just right. For example, when colleagues get along, subordinates give cigarettes to leaders. Because it is said that the Chinese New Year is coming, they will give some native products of their hometown, such as loquat, sweet potato, bayberry and fruit. Fresh and delicious just picked, let the leaders taste and express their affection.

At this time, I just don't want it. He said you took bribes? Don't! Just show it and I have you in my heart.

Do we have to refuse at this time? There's no need! Accepting this small gift will neither make others misunderstand, nor make people feel that you are heartless and do not understand accidents.

In short, through reading, it should be clear to everyone that Uncle Wen Zi is really not simple. He is a bit like the golden mean advocated by Confucius and can grasp everything.

Whether you talk, laugh or take, you have principles and discretion, but you are not as good as it. So Confucius gave his own sigh. Is this really the case? If so, it would be amazing! Give him praise.

Well, that's all for this chapter. Tomorrow we will continue to learn the next chapter.

Confucius said, "Zang Wuzong, if he is not as good as Lu, I don't believe him even though he doesn't want a gentleman."

I mentioned Zang Wuzhong again. What happened to him? Let's meet here at 6: 30 tomorrow to study and discuss together. Thank you for listening. See you at 6: 30 tomorrow morning.