Crow and fox in humorous jokes

Humor is like a bridge, which narrows the distance between people and bridges the gap between people. Humor is essential for those who work hard and want to establish good relations with others, and it is also necessary for everyone who wants to reduce the recurrence of their lives? A crutch? . The following is a complete collection of humorous jokes I have compiled for you.

? The crow and the fox

The fox was foraging in the forest and saw a crow standing in a tree with a piece of meat in its mouth. He wants to eat meat and says to the crow. Dear crow, I think you must sing very well! ? The crow sang happily when he heard this, and the meat in his mouth fell to the ground. The fox bent down happily to pick it up, and a tiger appeared from the grass behind him and untied his belt. You are a snack, and you can't be cured without a backer. ?

? Kissed the goddess.

Today, the chicken was frozen. I secretly kissed the goddess Gao Yuanyuan when she wasn't looking. The only drawback is that the TV screen is too fucking dirty. Full of dust. .

? Pay attention to cooking

? Cooking pays attention to the ratio of rice to water. ? He wrote this sentence in his diary and his mother saw it. Her mother sighed and said, look at you. You wrote the wrong word again. ? And then added all the last three words? Bodies? With the prefix, dung beetles Jr. smiled happily.

? Come on!

Take a road test when learning to drive, and the co-pilot has an examiner.

When I got on the bus, I started in the first gear, and the examiner suddenly said, Come on! ?

When you are happy, you will have an opportunity to take the exam. I reached out two fingers obsequiously and smiled at the examiner. Yeah! ?

The examiner's face is black: I told you to speed up! ?

? Pay attention to the way you speak.

? Bring my cup up. I think you should use the word "please" Can you bring my cup up?

? Play cards out of the ordinary

Today, I teased a girl that if there are only two people in the world, one is that I love you, and the other is that I don't love you, and I don't love you. What's the name of the other person?

I only heard the girl say a word lightly: survivor.

This is not a routine card!

? Trying to cheat me!

Just now, on the bus, an old man suddenly came over. I didn't even think about giving up my seat decisively. The old man was very moved. As a result, the old man said you were a good man. Why don't we become sworn brothers? I said that the old man's life is high this year, and the old man said 93. I really can't find a reason to refuse. The old man knelt on the ground and said, I don't want to be born on the same day in the same year, but I do? When I heard this, my legs went soft.

? The school was rejected.

Rooster's application for school was rejected because he couldn't hand in an inch of bareheaded photos.

? Square dance aunt surprised the county government

At the entrance of yamen, an old woman waved a hammer and beat the drums. Bao Zheng asked. What grievances do you have? The old woman said:? If there is no injustice, I will make a rhythm and the sisters will dance here. ?

? Mysterious man

It is said that the fat man's Tintin is small and the big nose's Tintin is big. Think about Bajie, it's a mystery. Dude.

? The shortest sentence

Teacher:? Please make sentences with "you" and "you". The shorter the sentence, the better! ?

Xiaoming:? Double! ?

Teacher:? That makes perfect sense. I can't find a reason to let you go out! ?

? Lengthened tofu

In a restaurant, a man pointed to a tofu more than two meters long in the dish and shouted, What ears do you have? I ordered homemade tofu! ? When the chef heard this, he wondered: Isn't it long enough?

? A drunk meets a drunk.

A drunk stumbled out of the bar and walked to a newly dug grave. He lost his balance and fell. There was a pool of water in the grave, and he cried all night. Help! Am I cold? When the bar was closing, another drunk passed by and heard something. He went to the open grave, looked down and said, fool, you have pushed all the dirt away. Can it not be cold?

? Have no money to get a driver's license

Before practicing driving, the master let me see how much oil there is. I unscrewed the fuel tank cap and didn't see it clearly for a long time. The light is too dim. I took out my lighter and approached the fuel tank. Just as I was about to press the lighter, Master kicked me away. Master Nima has a bad temper. I tried not to get angry. When I was practicing, it happened to be downhill. When I stepped on the accelerator nervously, the coach shouted: Brake! ! Brake with your feet! ? I quickly opened the car door and stepped on the ground, rubbing like the devil's pace! After dragging for more than twenty meters, it finally stopped! The coach was so scared that he took ten yuan and asked me to buy him a box of Chinese pressure! At that time, I wondered how I could calm my nerves with toothpaste! When I handed him the Chinese toothpaste, he silently refunded all the tuition fees and said that there was another one next door. I said I was the one next door. ......

? The most helpless thing

The most helpless thing is that you sincerely praise someone's beautiful beard, but she immediately turns her back on him.

? suggestion

Once upon a time, a buddy borrowed money from me, saying that he was going to propose marriage and asked me to borrow money to buy a ring. He told me that my mother forced me!

I was confused at that time. Your mother forced me? Don't swear!

? Why do you play basketball?

Reporter: Yao Ming, why did you play basketball? Yao Ming: You can't buy shoes of size 55 on the street. I heard that the basketball team can be customized ~

? Why are there no eunuchs from Fujian in history?

Why are there no Fujian eunuchs in history?

Emperor: I am hungry!

Fujian little eunuch brought a bowl of rice: Emperor, it just collapsed!

Little eunuch pawn

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