Empty talk without content? Reading in this way can help you accumulate speaking resources!

When we chat with others, the topic is indispensable material.

And many people can't chat with others well, not because of his poor expression ability, but because there are not enough topics in his stomach to deal with the current conversation.

So when you have to face some chat scenes, because of the lack of relevant content reserves, you finally have to choose a silent posture to show people.

Of course, there are specialties in the industry. One can't know everything and talk about everything.

But if we know how to actively accumulate topics that may be used according to the needs of life or work, so as to open other people's chatterboxes and establish relationships, it will be very helpful to us.

Reading is one of the means to accumulate topics.

As we all know, reading can increase our conversation.

However, most people's problem is not that they haven't read it, but that they have read it, but they don't have or don't know how to turn what they see into their own talk.

Why is this happening?

Because of our reading mode, we have been stuck in a shallow consciousness.

Have you found that your "difficulty in remembering" is getting worse? For a certain information, you know what it is, and you almost talk about it, but you just can't remember it.

For example, the name of a star, TV series or movie, or some knowledge you have learned, or even what your family told you to buy yesterday, is easy to forget.

This is what psychology calls "the tip of the tongue phenomenon".

The reason why this phenomenon occurs is that when our brain encodes memory, it needs a combination of multiple channels to convert it into information of brain memory.

Once these combinations are incomplete in the process of memory coding, or some signals are lost when extracting coding, it is difficult for the memory object to be awakened by the brain.

In today's era when information is so developed, all kinds of information are everywhere. We spent a lot of energy sifting out useful information. If we have to make extra efforts to keep everything we see in mind, it will almost kill us.

Therefore, we can only use fragmented coding to remember a lot of things we see. And this is an incomplete memory coding method.

As a result, no matter how much information we receive, it only stays in the shallow consciousness of memory, and it is difficult for us to turn it into talk.

Investigation on reading style

Our reading behavior can generally be divided into two motives:

1, leisure reading;

2. purposeful reading;

For most people, leisure reading is often the main content in daily life. For example, brush Weibo, watch the news, or read a few pages of novels when you are free.

This kind of reading is how much we see and how much we can remember, and everything goes with the flow. Because of the incomplete coding method, we are prone to "tongue tip phenomenon".

But this way is far from enough to increase our talk. We need to consciously read in an output-oriented way, so as to cultivate our ability to talk with others.

I wrote nearly two million words online, which lasted two or three years. I did it alone, and there was no team to help me collect information. If I don't read in an output way and can't translate what I have learned into what I want to express, it will be difficult for me to write so many articles.

Therefore, when reading, you must consciously adjust your reading style and output what you see to a topic that can be used for chatting.

Therefore, our reading behavior should be linked to "dialogue ability".

In other words, we can't read like the general way of learning, but we should read in a more appropriate way according to the purpose of "turning content into talking capital".

This method cannot be too simple, or too difficult as fragmented reading, or a deep learning method. Obviously, this is unnecessary.

How?

If you want to get talk capital, you must know what kind of content can be called "talk capital".

Talking about resources is of course composed of content. But not all the content is suitable for saying.

For example, there is a joke:

A girl opened a web page, but I didn't expect there were many animated effects of butterflies flying on the page. The girl exclaimed, "These butterflies are so beautiful!"

Her programmer boyfriend said flatly, "In fact, this is just a scripting language written by JavaScript."

This boyfriend just "smartly" told his girlfriend what was not suitable for the topic as a chat topic, which ruined the atmosphere.

In order to find the right chat content, we must first know how to identify the "essence of content".

We read a passage, no matter what kind of ideas it wants to express, it has its own logical system. Generally speaking, this logic system consists of three parts:

1, point of view;

2. explanation;

3. Case display;

Give a simple example.

The following is an excerpt from Richard E.Nisbett's book Logical Thinking with Intelligent Thinking Tools:

"The subconscious has been helping us to do something useful and even indispensable.

The subconscious thought is "what happened before we realized it" for us. Think about it, our perceptual system is unconsciously controlling this series of stimuli. What we can realize in our minds is only a small part of these stimuli. Those unconscious thoughts before conscious thoughts are the stimuli you are interested in, or the stimuli you need to deal with.

If you question this statement, please imagine a scene where you are in a room with a floor clock. Whether you realize it or not, you have been listening to the clock tick. How can we confirm this? Because if the clock stops moving, then you will notice it immediately.

Alternatively, you can also think about the "cocktail party phenomenon". You are standing in a room with 30 other people, trying to hear what the person who is talking to you said in the noise of the room. She has been talking, but you can't hear her. No, actually, you do. It's just that what you hear is what people around you say.

However, if someone about 0/.5 meters away from you mentions your name, you will hear it immediately and then turn to him. "

Think about it, how can we divide the "logical system" that makes up these contents into three different parts?

In the first sentence of this paragraph, the author has made clear his views to be discussed next.

The second paragraph is the author's further explanation

As for the rest, it is obviously a case show that explains this view.

After this division, if you think this view is good and reasonable, have you absorbed a new knowledge point-view, and you also know the logical deduction behind this knowledge point-explanation and examples?

Even if you don't agree with this view, you will have your own reasons. When you talk about this topic with others, you can also give a reason.

When we talk to others, to some extent, it is around the activities of "exporting opinions" and "telling examples".

If your mind doesn't construct some ideas, then you are just a follower of others; And if you only have one view, but there is no relevant explanation, then you may have missed the logical deduction that produced this view.

For example, if you tell others that Cristiano Ronaldo is better than Messi, this is your opinion. Then do you want to tell others what is the basis of logical deduction? Such as the number of goals scored, the performance on the field, the number of awards, etc. Can you give some relevant examples to illustrate?

People who often speak by feeling tend to talk dry.

You keep telling people "I think this society is not good" and "this movie is simply insulting the audience", but you can't say anything else, so it's hard for others to pay attention to your words.

So the reasons and examples that make up your point of view are also one of the materials you should accumulate.

Now you know how to split the content of the article, at least what you see won't be "clear at a glance"

This practice won't take us much time; When reading, as long as we think consciously, we can quickly find out these three parts.

But we can't memorize everything we see. It is still the main way to increase the amount of speech and accumulation through understanding.

How to gain understanding?

It is through structured thinking that the meaning of these three components is summarized with a key word.

In view of the above paragraphs, we can summarize the author's views, explanations and cases as follows:

Viewpoint: The function of subconscious helps us to do things;

Explanation: the subconscious mind works before the consciousness captures the stimulus;

Examples: Bell test and cocktail party effect;

Because this is a structured inductive summary, the brain will accept it more easily. So when we recall the content through these keywords, with the help of these "anchor points", it is easy to wake up what we see.

When you happen to talk to a friend about this topic and say that the subconscious will respond to external stimuli before the conscious, you can associate relevant examples with your friends according to the two key words "Bell Experiment" or "cocktail party effect".

Of course, not all content will have three elements: opinions, explanations and examples. For example, news events, announcements, etc. Only tell stories, there won't be any expression of opinions and feelings.

At this time, we don't need to find out all the "three elements", just use one or two keywords to summarize the core meaning of the content.

For example, some news events or story cases can be framed according to the six elements of the composition, and the key words can be summarized:

1, time;

2. location;

3. Characters;

4. The cause of the incident;

5. After that;

6. Results;

Why do you need to summarize what you see?

This is a process of thinking. Because if we don't have enough understanding of what we see, it is difficult for us to generalize; If you use one or two keywords to summarize the meaning of the paragraph, it means that you have memorized and coded the content.

This kind of structured multidimensional memory conforms to the characteristics that the brain likes to be systematic and regular, which will make you play a more solid role in accumulating and extracting conversation resources.

When you want to recall the relevant content according to the chat topic, you can at least "trace back".

Of course, if you don't let what you see come out through your mouth, then you can't easily use these "conversations".

Therefore, adding a memory coding channel to retell what you have seen and heard in your own language can not only deepen your memory, but also improve the fluency of using the topic in the process of retelling.

But how to repeat it effectively? Of course, not word for word, the original text is said intact.

You should know how to filter out the appropriate content according to the central meaning of the original text and then according to the expression framework of ideas, explanations and examples.

This expression framework is actually a simplified framework summarized by keywords in the previous step. We organize language to express it, and we can also use it as a framework to tell it.

For example, for example, I will repeat it like this:

"The subconscious sometimes helps us to do things. (viewpoint)

Because the subconscious will receive information from the outside world before the consciousness, it has already responded to the stimulus before it really realizes what happened. For example, the "cocktail party effect" in psychology says so. (explanation)

It seems that when we are in a noisy environment, we can't hear anything clearly. But in fact, our unconscious has been controlling these external stimuli. If someone calls our name not far away at this moment, the subconscious will respond to this stimulus before the consciousness. (example)

After receiving this message, we will consciously look up for the person who calls our name. This is the function of the subconscious mind, which helps us invisibly. "(emphasize this point again)

In daily life, there is no need to repeat it so accurately. It is no problem to fill in the "nonsense" of memory silence with one or two sentences. As long as the general direction of expression is similar to your original text.

It is worth noting that in our usual conversation, we will not follow the steps of viewpoints, reasons and examples; These elements are often scattered and mixed in our chat.

When the other person says "opinions", you can directly say "examples"; When the other person tells some "examples", you can help him sum up his "opinions"; If the other person doesn't know how to explain his point of view, you give your "reason".

If you chat with others like this, you won't be afraid of having nothing to say.

For many people, they have a misunderstanding about chatting, that is, they must use the most knowledgeable and in-depth content as a topic before they are qualified to chat with others.

Based on this idea, it seems that everyone will let others know that they have no culture without adding a few seemingly knowledgeable words in the chat.

Therefore, most people who are not good at talking prefer to remain silent because there is no such "profound" topic.

It is true that if you can properly show your knowledge and tell some "cold knowledge" that others don't understand or have never heard of, you will definitely give people a strong feeling.

But in daily life, our chat is more about chatting than academic discussion. In this case, almost any topic can be used as a chat topic.

You can talk about football, basketball and other sports.

You can talk about food, catering or weather changes.

We can talk about life, work and ideals.

We can talk about love, responsibility and human feelings.

You can even have a simple and relaxed discussion with others around books, movies, TV programs, current affairs news or social issues.

You can exchange your views on something, or on a person, and talk about your own feelings.

In short, as long as the topic you talk about will not cause any harm to others and can meet the needs of current chat, then any content can be your conversation material.

Be a conscientious person in life and embrace every minute of your experience, and you will naturally accumulate a lot of topics you want to share with others.