Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Salary is like a period, once a month, and it will be gone in a week or so.
Salary is like a period, once a month, and it will be gone in a week or so.
Second, things in the world are often trapped and defeated by extravagance.
Third, once frustrated, my understanding of work and life has deepened.
Fourth, the meaning of life lies in giving, not in receiving, nor in fighting for it.
I wake up every morning thinking that my grandfather quit, and my grandson went to work twenty minutes later.
Sixth, there is great competitive pressure at work. Go home and take a cold bath, eat well and go to bed early. If you have nothing to do, just go out for a walk. If you are bored, you can chat, and your wife and children will go into battle together to relieve stress.
7. Work and life need enthusiasm and action, hard work and initiative, which requires us to treat work, others and life with a positive attitude. Only with a positive attitude can we take responsibility, unite and innovate, and handle all kinds of complicated problems well.
Eight, don't work hard for the time being, and try to find a job in the future.
Nine, attitude leads to different likes and dislikes, different choices, so it naturally determines success or failure. Work and life need enthusiasm and action, and a proactive and spontaneous spirit. Imagine if each of us had less complaints, more enthusiasm, less negativity, more efforts, less comparison and more indifference in our daily work and life. What will be the result? In other words, since we are together today, let's join hands to correct, show and be firm.
Dear wife, I feel sorry for your fatigue, and work is inevitably important! Because we have to pave the way for a happy future! What is fatigue? Let's run towards happiness hand in hand! Although we are not in the same city, our hearts will always be together! You are the only wife in my life, and I love you!
Eleven, I am exhausted, physically and mentally exhausted!
Twelve, a machine can do the work of fifty ordinary people, but no machine can complete the work of a great man.
Thirteen, if a person is determined to be what kind of person, or have the confidence to achieve what kind of things, then, driven by will or thought will make him get what he wants, get what he wants.
Fourteen, catch more, don't compete with others for money, don't strive for merit, laugh often, be kind to others, help others, and have less troubles. Life is a song, and contentment is always a joy. Not much money, but happy enough.
Fifteen, harmony, honesty, good at thinking about the accountability system, pioneering and enterprising, Qi Xin cooperation, care, * * * and progress.
Sixteen, put down your shelf, correct your attitude, often even a small matter, can also achieve your brilliant life!
Seventeen, in the work, conflicts and contradictions are always inevitable. Sometimes there will be quarrels, disputes, struggles and even struggles, which are actually inevitable. But no matter what happened before, as long as it is my colleague, he shows a willingness to reconcile or reconcile, and I am willing to reconcile.
Eighteen, you really have no idea how tired we are! I have become a little girl and a woman: when I raise my arm, I have muscles. Do coolies every day!
Nineteen, work, take a step back; Love, take a step back and broaden the horizon.
Twenty, we are all poor and busy people. In order to live, we are busy, exhausted and stressed every day. We are willing to endure hardships in pursuit of happiness, struggle for entrepreneurship, and pursue harmony without feeling wronged. We have pain in our hearts and who to talk to. Only the internet can vent our emotions.
Twenty-one, people are tired, their hearts are tired, and their bodies are tired; Never shout tired; Bear hardships, stand hard and live a hard life; Never shout bitterness; High pressure, low pressure, life pressure; Never shout. Men's Health Day, decompress yourself and be happy every day!
Twenty-two, no matter how hard you work, your salary will not go up, and you will go up if you don't struggle.
Twenty-three, there is pressure to have motivation, motivation to have potential, potential to have charm, charm to have action, action to have ability, and ability to decompress. Pressure is everywhere, burning a new era! Did you decompress today?
Twenty-four, in the work, we should learn to be firm in our goals. Otherwise, when encountering difficulties, as long as there is an opportunity and a retreat, we will instinctively try to avoid or retreat. Only by aiming at the target will we try our best or cross those obstacles. I chat with some people who have succeeded or achieved something in a certain field. No matter how different their temperament and temper are, they are all similar in this respect.
Twenty-five, smile more every day and be happier every day; When you encounter a difficult thing, it will be much easier to face it with a smile, which can also play an effective decompression effect! Dear, let's smile for ourselves together!
Friends, don't think too much about some things. People always have a childlike innocence, so that they won't feel very tired. Learn to take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, learn to decompress and relax when you have time. Don't back down. I wish you happiness every day.
Twenty-seven, work every year, worry every year, work overtime every day like a monkey, work overtime without pay, and be scolded for no reason every day.
Twenty-eight, sometimes idle to death, sometimes busy to death.
Twenty-nine, heavy responsibility, great intensity, pressure may come at any time; Invisible, intangible, and truly felt; Tension, anxiety, depression, insomnia, irritability; Make up a short message to greet you today, and you will be relaxed and not tired; Talk, smile, no pressure, no worries.
Bathing in the morning sunshine, increasing hormone secretion, humming childhood songs, let you get rid of complexity, imagine the little things around you, the roadside is full of flowers, a short silence, occasionally listening to a joke, and exercising, swimming and yoga can all help you decompress.
Thirty-one, salary is like a period, once a month, and it will be gone in a week or so.
Life is a lamp and work is oil. Come on when the light is on!
Thirty-three, later, later, I don't want to live like this.
Only by working hard for the perfection of his contemporaries and their happiness can a person achieve his own perfection.
Thirty-five, take the first-class style and do dirty work.
I am aware of the importance of attitude. Whether studying or working, a positive attitude is the guarantee of success. In learning, if you don't have a good attitude, you will shrink back when you encounter difficulties. It is impossible to achieve excellent results if you are discouraged because of a little setback. Work has to be different. Maybe you have a high degree and outstanding qualifications, but if you don't work hard, you can only accomplish nothing in the end.
No.37, if I let you down, the devil takes the hindmost. If you betray me, you will be killed.
Sorry, I'm an artist. Staring at beautiful women is my job.
I want you to be the happiest man and let you know that it is not wrong to choose me.
Forty, if you want to kick the ball too much, your feet will tremble; If you want to write well, your hands will tremble. Not aiming at the target, but often missing; Let's put down our goals and relax. I wish you no pressure, full of energy, no distractions and all the best.
There are a group of Smurfs on this side of the mountain and on the other side of the sea! They are diligent and clever. They worked overtime until dawn. ...
Forty-two, there are coup for decompression at work: work hard, don't worry, always smile, be close to people, help colleagues, strengthen relationships, send more blessings and build relationships. In the face of competition, be fair and reasonable, in the face of scandal, just ignore it. The workplace is changing and calm.
43. What is attitude? In my opinion, attitude is a state of mind, an opinion, an opinion, a pursuit of a spirit and a belief. Every day, we are constantly making one decision or another. Sometimes we choose and insist, and sometimes we refuse and give up. It is our views and attitudes towards things that influence these decisions. For everyone, whether dealing with people or working life, attitude is very important, which determines too much in our life.
Forty-four, get up every morning to watch the Forbes rich list. If my name is not on it, I will go to work …
45. Smile is the yearning for happiness; Smile is an optimistic interpretation; Smile is the decompression of the mind; Smile is the release of spirit; Smile is the yearning for life; Keep smiling, maybe you can embrace happiness.
Forty-six, relax and let go of your troubles, try to relax and smile, work smart and happy, and indulge in entertainment. Think of friends' blessings, recall past laughter, let go of confusion and confusion, live a relaxed and happy life without worries and complaints.
Forty-seven, only women and English are sad, only wives and jobs are hard to find!
Forty-eight, live honestly and don't dream! Only by working honestly can you have a bright future.
I left in a hurry, just as I came in a hurry Wave and say goodbye to you!
No matter what I do, I always think that as long as my energy allows, I will serve my country first.
5 1. Who wants to go to school but doesn't want to work like me?
Fifty-two, every day when the alarm clock rings, there are 500 reasons for asking for leave in my mind, and I don't want to go to work, but none of them are reliable.
Fifty-three, watching the computer every day, tired eyes, radiation or something.
I hope someone will accompany me from ear-length short hair to waist-length long hair, from school uniform to wedding dress.
Fifty-five, time flies, like water, you grow in the meaning of divination.
56. Life is nothing more than birth and death. Life is like swimming. It's normal to have ups and downs. When the pressure is high, the center of gravity is unstable and it is difficult to make progress. So, I advise you to decompress, and you can be happy all your life.
Fifty-seven, maybe after today, the sun is shining and happy, maybe after today, life is colorful, maybe after today, troubles are far from happiness. Don't worry about small entanglements, and go on with an optimistic smile. Live a song and be happy for tomorrow.
Fifty-eight, the mood at work is heavier than going to the grave.
Fifty-nine, busy work is very tired, troubles are embarrassing, and pressure is really exhausting; Happiness is so simple that life is always tasteless; Simple greetings accompany you, may your mood be the most beautiful; Happiness is precious after all, and health and safety will accompany you all your life.
60. Laughter is always difficult to grow, it is depressing and distant, fighting spirit is high and confused, heroic and free and tangled, life is open once, life is easy once, and life is stress-free with an indulgent mind.
6 1. And through this work, we will be very happy and come at once.
Sixty-two, my heart is no longer comfortable. When someone asks, the sentence "nothing" blurts out.
Maybe I should quit. I can't adapt to that job at all. . . .
Do what you want to do, and you will have no job in your life.
At any time, we should give generously and educate ourselves. Many people are not stingy with their parents' self-education since childhood. After having children, they never forget to be stingy with their self-education. In fact, from the beginning of self-rebellion, we can think independently, or leave our parents and live alone, we have already started the process of self-education. If the individual is unwilling to make painstaking efforts and invest money in self-education in this process, then the development is not good, and the key time is only lack of knowledge, so there should be no complaints.
Sixty-six, stress leads to human dysfunction, and adjusting diet can relieve stress; Eating more coarse grains is a good way to relieve stress, and banana yogurt is a sword to stabilize mood; Minerals promote metabolism, and the best decompressor is fresh fruits and vegetables.
Sixty-seven, men suffer, men are tired, and men earn money to support their families; Work hard, struggle hard, and make a living.
I am not color blind, but my sky is always gray.
Sixty-nine, work in a hurry, a cup of soybean milk, nervous after work, the road is like a parking lot, workplace, cold heart, not in a hurry to get the year-end bonus, all honor their mother-in-law, hard to find a target, tight resources, when can they be comfortable!
Being in love is like having a period, and it hurts once.
1, you have to believe that I said this for you.
It is more reliable for an enemy to become a friend than a friend, and it is more dangerous for a friend to become an enemy.
3. The past is a medicine, and we are used to healing with memories. The past is a kind of fetter and a kind of strength.
I miss you very much, but I didn't show any signs.
5, back and forth thoughts fly with you, without you, the world is barren.
6. I like that he doesn't love him as much as written in the novel, but I like him for many years and have loved him for so many years.
7. If a person is not free, it is because he doesn't want to be free.
8. You can save yourself when my heart of stone falls into a cliff.
9. You are like the starlight at the fingertips, which I can see but can't touch.
10, to be strong, you must have a heart that is not easy to break.
1 1. Compared with cursing/speaking/silence, it is the most complete disappointment.
12. What can I do to make love happy?
13, love is not here, but I haven't left yet. When can a person's life be free and easy?
14, love is like a painful period.
15. If you are still single, enjoy it. You are single not because you are not good enough, but because no one deserves you at present.
16, I only know that I am possessive and want to cover your whole heart.
17, since I blacklisted you, my heart has stopped hurting, my eyes have stopped hurting, and the whole person is full of energy. I am so happy squatting in the corner.
18, I am fooling around alone.
19. Without you, tomorrow is not worth looking forward to, and yesterday is not worth remembering.
No one needs to sacrifice his life to prove how much he loves someone.
2 1, suppress yourself again and again but indulge yourself again and again.
22. The biggest sorrow in life is that I am dead and you are still alive!
After you really love someone, you will find that you can't love others anymore.
24. If there is nothing you can do, just let it go. To you who are struggling at the moment.
25, some things, maybe you haven't thought about it, but it has happened.
26. I am no longer jealous or paranoid. I'm tired, so you can go with whoever you like.
27. [Love never has the best of both worlds, only both lose]
28. The most painful love triangle in the world is that I love to eat fat and love me.
29. There are two kinds of men. One put you on the bed, and the other put you in your heart.
30. Some things are only worth remembering, and some people can only be passers-by; If you don't look back, why don't you forget? Since there is no chance, why curse?
3 1, I am demagogic, I am evil, I am vulgar, I am invulnerable, I am invulnerable. Is it strong?
32. We are busy all day, as noisy as swarms of soulless flies, and we can't hear the voice in the depths of our souls.
When we were young, we learned to be strong when we were injured.
If I have money, I want to buy all your lies.
35. For a moment, I hoped that time would stop forever, just for a word I didn't want to hear anyway.
I admit that what I say sometimes hurts you, but I didn't mean to. I know I feel bad after hurting you.
37. We always love those who hurt us and hurt those who love us.
38. The more people laugh at dreams, the more valuable it is to realize them.
Don't hate me. Don't remember me because you hate me. Sorry, I can't stand it.
I wish I could write such a poem. I wish I were a star.
4 1. The only pain I feel about death is that I failed to die for love.
42. When I love you, I feel cute when you eat shit. When I don't love you, I think you are eating shit when I eat.
I believe in energy conservation. Everyone's love is limited, and it's over when it's used up.
Let's talk about the sentence about your period.
1, my aunt came in the middle of the night with a terrible headache and wanted to cry. She felt very uncomfortable and wronged. She didn't want to wake her family, so she stood up and found that no one could accompany her at this time.
It is as hot as a dog these days. It was even hotter when I entered the village yesterday, and I ate countless popsicles. It's really a sin to come to my period today.
I've had a really bad time recently, and I was very depressed before my period. There is also a lot of work. Very sad.
4. My menstruation in summer is simply a chronic suicide. I dare not try tampons. I cried.
I finally took a bite of Qiao Lezi when I came to my period, and I really wanted to eat ice cream.
6. Try again on the brink of death. The world news will come soon, so don't come to my aunt for cold milk again. It is enough to wake up in pain.
7. Don't be too fragile when you have your period. I always want to cry, and the time before I came was particularly sad.
8. I am exhausted at the thought that I will have my period one day.
9. I think I'm going to die. Fainting for the first time is like menstruating for the first time.
10, once you eat ice cream and drink iced coke, you can't break the spell of menstruation. I have a hunch that I will die tomorrow.
1 1. You can ask for leave aboveboard when you come to your period, and then you plan to stay in bed for one day.
12, I want to be a man in my next life, with no holidays and no children.
13, don't try to be brave and go to the water park during your holiday! It will be fatal! Don't say that your period is late and your stomach still hurts! The kind that hurts when walking!
14, it's been so long in summer, and it's the first time the company sends out ice cream and meets my aunt.
15, really, in these four years, I really got the curse of menstruation as soon as I got out of Xi' an. It's accurate every time
16. On the first day of my period, I felt I couldn't move. It is uncomfortable to store water and sodium. I went to the toilet four times last night and arrived on time with the pain of hope. My heart is at ease.
17, I forgot to have my period, and then I drank a large glass of bingguozhen, and now my stomach still hurts. I think I will definitely get Alzheimer's disease when I am old.
18, every time I come to my period, I have to make trouble. The old man is completely used to my 1 month 1 day, and I will come back after crying.
19, I catch a cold every time I come to my period. I have diarrhea every time I catch a cold. Why am I so weak?
I haven't menstruated for a long time. I've been in the toilet for n times by two o'clock. Now, I just want to have a sitting toilet.
2 1, I didn't want to do sanitation when I was idle some time ago. I had my period last night, and I suddenly feel full of energy today, probably because I have no pain.
22. I think of showing off while eating ice cream during my period in junior high school. "Who said that my aunt can't eat ice cream, so I won't hurt?" Look at this. I accidentally drank a cold drink and got dysmenorrhea. I really want to take a picture of myself who is so young and not sensible.
23. I want to die in the toilet every time I have my period, and I want to be a man in my next life.
24. Eternal Theorem: On the first day of exercise, my aunt ate two popsicles, watermelon and ice pudding, and drank two bottles of ice cream. I guess I'll die tomorrow.
25. I was really in class when I came to my period. I'm sleepy and have a stomachache.
26. Every time I come to my period, my temper is so bad that I am afraid. I fought for no reason, and I tortured Xiao Hu to death. My real name is distressed.
27. Oral ulcer hurts when drinking water. My aunt spent a whole day in bed yesterday, and now I just want to lie in bed.
28, my mother said, do you know why you don't have your period? You stay up late every day, I said, I just have a different schedule from you. According to you, it's really awesome that American women don't have their period.
Yesterday, I lost my temper and was in a bad mood. I scolded everyone. I thought I had my period. I hope I don't have a stomachache today. I doubt my life every time I come to my period recently.
The feeling of being unemployed after just working for a month. Talk about article 58.
I lost my job just after working for a month. When I met the sun, the sunflower taught me to try to smile at the sun.
2. I am so tired that I dance mechanically when I walk and twitch when I eat noodles.
3. Every unsatisfied present has a past that didn't work hard.
4. Life is awkward now. Half the time I study hard, half the time I feel depressed, and I cry when I see the computer screen.
Two years ago today, I lost my first job. Today, I smiled more brightly.
6. Family relationship breaks down, love fails and unemployment occurs.
7. Husband is a woman's occupation. No husband means unemployment, so you should hold on to this job!
8. My sister told me today that she was unemployed. I asked, why were you fired? My sister replied, "They think I'm fat. I feel wronged for my sister. This is discrimination. You can sue them. Where do you work and what do you do? Sister, I'm the last step in the massage parlor! ! !
9. Break through the shackles of habits: Different things should be treated in different ways. Once behavior becomes a habit, thinking tends to become rigid.
10. Unemployed investment failed, my friend cheated me of my money, and I didn't return to my physical examination. Life is so tired, let me lie down for a while.
1 1. Be yourself, others have already done it.
12. You said you could get unemployment benefits, and then you talked about the essence of receiving benefits, haha. I asked you if you missed me, and you said yes. You asked me if I was busy at home recently? I said that time flies, so we should cherish it. You said that you always cherish it, but you don't want me to know. You also said that you can't be too selfish to delay me. Then when it comes to finally having time, you said to play together. Although you said to let me pay, you said to wait until my company was finished before hanging up.
13. One day I will make a wish, hoping that when I wake up, I will be in a place without troubles.
14. But it's really hard, tears can't stop, it's too hard, it's too hard.
15. If you want to live a plain life, you only need one person in your life.
16. When I travel through the four seasons of time and look back on my past mood, sometimes I laugh and sometimes I feel sad. Obsessed with the meaning of life, the tenderness of affection, and the wailing of sadness in my heart are just gratitude after all. Life is so thin and bitter, how rare it is to make your hands warm.
17. Each of us is eager to be beautiful, excellent and rich, and you strive to be beautiful and excellent, not just to deserve someone. You want a wonderful and rich life in live high. If you are in full bloom, you won't care when the breeze comes.
18. Not every effort will be rewarded, but every harvest requires effort, which is irreversible.
19. The hardships of life are directly in front of you at this moment.
I just worked for a month and lost my job. Tell me about the second part. 20. Be a man like water, pursue wholeheartedly, go all the way well, don't care about the irritability around, don't be busy with the right and wrong outside, have no distractions, and success is just around the corner.
2 1. The weather is fine. I quit my job and felt like the sun. After more than two months, I was free again.
22. The difference between people is that they accumulate less every day, and one day you will find that I am so much less than him.
If you don't know where to go, come to my heart, but it's not spacious enough for you.
Life is hard, but I didn't really realize it until I was 30.
25. People have a heart, money is powerful, people are unintentional, and money is gone. The good of others is not their own success, but their own bad is the danger of others.
26. A man gives everything for a home, but what he wants in his heart is actually very simple, that is, a warm home. It is a man's greatest comfort to take care of everything at home, hold up half the sky and relieve worries.
27. Why do people have so many troubles and unhappiness in their life? Even I can't tell why. Really, sometimes I feel tired and confused living in this world.
28. Every time you cry, you wake up.
29. This time last year, I was training in a bank. Seven months later, I resigned. Two months later, I worked as an editor in a small company. Later, I found out that I was cheated, so I resigned again! Now I'm unemployed again! I feel that I will never love again.
30. People let us rely on our own strength!
3 1. Even if the dream is out of reach, it will come true one day as long as you persist.
The most difficult time is the day when we are not far from success.
The more difficult it is, the more you should cultivate yourself and have a strong heart to face the unknown tomorrow.
34. The secret of success is not the secret at all, that is, keep doing it.
Sometimes I feel sad, but I'm too proud to say it.
36. Sometimes, when you ask a question, the other person keeps dodging, which is to tell you euphemistically that the real answer is cruel.
37. People are defeated by themselves, first by emotions. People who can't control their emotions can lose sleep all night with a word from others.
The last thing a person can't forget is the person who helped you when you were in trouble.
The feeling of being unemployed after just working for a month. 39. Everything will be replaced by making money. You are lovelorn, unemployed and betrayed by your best friend, and you will be suppressed by making money, because you give yourself a sense of security. Only by working hard can you give yourself an explanation. Details and personality determine a person's future, so give me my hand and work with me.
40. Most of the things you have been waiting for too long are not what you originally wanted.
4 1. Part I: doctoral students, graduate students, undergraduates, endless! Downstream: 05, 06, 07, unemployed! Horizontal batch: willing to study and admit defeat. It's another year of college entrance examination. I hope this year's candidates can have a bright future!
42. It's hard to be a man. People get bored when they talk cold, and they have fewer friends. If you don't pay, you will be annoyed and have fewer opportunities.
43. I lost myself in confusion. I have no hobbies, enthusiasm and curiosity, and no ideal direction. I really feel that I can't find a reason to struggle, and my heart is so tired.
44. Being unemployed for half a year, I feel haggard and want to work, only to find that I don't know what I can do. The salary of my job is not enough for my family's expenses. It's really incompetent.
45. Don't forget why you started just because you have gone too far.
46. In the geometry of life, there are always some bumps to be crossed and some responsibilities to be taken. Constantly falling, there will be constant tenacity and harvest; Constant wind and rain, only constant experience and understanding.
47. Forget the sour taste of love, you just need to remember the smell of money.
48. Dress gracefully and calmly every day, and bring yourself a different smile.
49. I am special. I'm officially unemployed.
50. My job is to love you, but dear, you cost me my job! Now living on the street
5 1. My life is a series of tragic works, but none of them are really staged.
52. Deprived of all the healthy elegance in life, suppressed the innocent fun of young people, destroyed the pleasant decorations in prime of life and old age, and turned life into a narrow road leading to the grave. This is the worst, but also hateful, hateful.
53. Brush the circle of friends, brush the friend dynamics, and now brush Weibo. That's the job. I am really speechless to myself. If this continues, I will lose my job sooner or later and suddenly want to change my working environment!
54. Every failure is the beginning of success.
55. Because I don't have any reserves, I encounter irresistible factors and my ability to resist risks is too poor. I really envy those who have houses and money. With more food reserves, they will live longer.
56. There are old people at the top and young people at the bottom. I still have a mortgage, and I can't find a job after I get laid off.
57. I don't know if I can continue. I hope this is a dream. When I wake up, everyone will continue to work.
58. I hope death is just a button on my body. If I press it, there will be no pain.
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