6 humorous jokes

6 humorous jokes We will find some funny things and words in our life. Jokes are short and typeset, and jokes come from life, which are often unexpected, ironic and entertaining. Here are six humorous jokes. Let's have a look!

6 humorous jokes 1 1. A rich woman walked her dog and met a beggar on the way. She laughed at the beggar: "You call me a dog barking, Dad, I'll give you a hundred dollars!" " The beggar said, "What if I scream ten times?" "The rich woman said happily," I'll give you a thousand dollars! ""The beggar immediately shouted "Dad" to the dog, which attracted the audience like a cloud. In full view, the rich woman had to pay him. The beggar took the money and shouted, "thank you, mom!" Thank you mom ... "

Every time you think you are smart, you have to pay the price. If you are arrogant and treacherous, you will be shattered sooner or later.

I have a crush on a girl. My friend gave me an idea and helped me light a candle downstairs to make a heart shape, making me shout, "Quiet, I love you!" " "But I am shy by nature, and I don't know how to speak for a long time after lighting a candle. More and more people are found upstairs. Several windows are full of people waiting to watch the excitement, and some even cheer me up. As a result, I held it for a long time and looked up and shouted "sell-wax-candles!" " "

Dare not pursue, dare not face, will make you lose happiness all your life. Learn to be brave and strive for what you want, at least because of your cowardice.

A couple quarreled in the street, and the girl slapped her boyfriend severely. In order to save face, the man shouted to the woman, "You can slap me again if you have the ability!" " "His girlfriend slapped him again without hesitation. The man paused and said, "Since you are so obedient, I will spare you. "

Bring disgrace to oneself, self-defeating, will never directly fight back. Don't say things you are not sure about easily, and you will hurt yourself in the end.

4. Once, I jokingly asked my six-year-old daughter, "We are going to raise a pig, but we need to arrange work. We need to choose one person to feed the pigs delicious food every day, one person to clean the room every day, one person to bathe the pigs every day, and one person to play with the pigs every day. What are you going to do? " The daughter replied without hesitation: "Be a pig!"

Life is not fixed. The answer is that the choice you give others is often exactly what you want others to choose, but it doesn't mean that others will choose according to your wishes.

5. A village head became a vegetable after being dismissed and was sent to the hospital. The doctor said, "It may be good to read him a notice of reinstatement." His wife thinks that since she wants to study, she might as well be a mayor to make him happy. But after reading it, the village chief stood up and laughed. The doctor sighed and said, "Don't follow the doctor's advice and increase the dose without authorization!" " "

There is a fine line between life and death. Some people commit suicide with desire, some with hope, and some with ignorance.

When I entered the room, I found a hundred-dollar bill on the table. Mom usually doesn't give pocket money. Oh, my God! Have mercy this time? I can't help feeling happy. When I picked up the bill, I found a note under it. I picked it up and looked at it. It says, "Today is your grandmother's birthday. Wait for me at home. Let's celebrate her birthday. Attention-that hundred dollars is not for you, it is to attract your attention! "

Six humorous jokes. Classmate: Teacher, you teach useless things in class. Teacher: classmate, don't sell yourself short.

Secondly, one day, the teacher told the students that only by doing good things can people go to heaven, where everything is available! Student: Wow! Teacher: Raise your hand if you want to go to heaven ~ Only the paragraph didn't raise your hand. Teacher: joke, you silly child, heaven is great. Why don't you want to go? Joke: Teacher, it's not that I don't want to go, but that I can't! Father said that I didn't do my homework well, so I studied at home and couldn't go anywhere.

Third, there is a teacher who is very narcissistic. One day, the teacher said in class that the word "give up" was not in my dictionary. Then Xiaoming picked up his dictionary and said, Teacher, I'll lend you my dictionary.

Fourth, there are keyboard men everywhere on the Internet, and there are also some circle of friends. That day, the joke was particularly disappointing and gave our peers a long face. Duan Zi took a new photo of Volkswagen in a circle of friends, and soon a keyboard man replied, "Did you buy a car yourself and a bike for your father?" The joke was angry at that time. "I didn't buy a bike for my dad, I bought a BMW for my dad." Netizens praised it.

One day, the word "author" was mentioned in Chinese class, and the teacher said with emotion, "Now everyone types with keyboards, so don't call yourself" author "when you talk online. Few people write with pens! " The student asked, "Ask the teacher, what should you call yourself?" The teacher replied, "You can call yourself a key person." The student asked again, "What do you call a person who is used to using a mouse instead of a keyboard?" The teacher said, "You can call it a mouse." The student asked again, "Smartphones are very popular now. Everyone uses a touch screen, no keyboard or mouse. What should we call it? " The teacher smiled and said, "It's easier. Let's call it "touching life"! "

The teacher asked to practice making sentences in class. The teacher asked Duan Zi: "Please make sentences with beauty", Duan Zi said: "I don't know what beauty means", the teacher asked Duan Zi: "Please make sentences with happiness", and Duan Zi said: "I don't know what happiness means". The teacher still asked Duan Zi: "Please make a sentence with treasure", and Duan Zi still said: "I don't know. Duan Zi said in surprise: "Why not? Didn't I make a sentence? "

6 humorous jokes 3 1. One day, when I was on the bus with some buddies, I saw a young man who looked like a student sitting in a parking space by the window. A middle-aged woman with a lot of makeup came over and told the buddy to give up. He wanted to sit in that seat, but the buddy didn't move. The middle-aged woman was so angry that she scolded the whole station. After the bus arrived at the next stop, she got on. ...

2. I bought Kongming lanterns when I visited the temple fair today, and I went to the park with my cousin Loli to put them in the evening. When I put it on, my cousin made a vow to be very religious. After that, she told me that her last wish to wear it came true. I thought, is Kongming Lantern so smart? Ask her what she wished for. She replied happily, "My last wish is to be 6 years old this year, and I am 6 years old this year!" " ".Well, sister, you win. . . . .

3. A friend gained 30 Jin in one semester in college. . When he came home from vacation, his father met him at the railway station. He didn't recognize it when he passed by. He chased him for a long time to explain. His father was still dubious and insisted on seeing his ID card. . . .

4. Go to the hospital for physical examination today. The doctor took my report and said, "It's a good thing you came early ..." When I broke out in a cold sweat, the doctor said unhurriedly, "If it's any later, I'll get off work."

When she was in high school, there were twin sisters in the school. Both of them have their own merits, but their comprehensive level is average. When the two sisters were in the third year of high school, their parents made an amazing and wise decision: let the younger sister repeat the grade until the second year of high school. . . . . . So, when my sister took the college entrance examination, my sister went to teach her weak subjects. Finally, my sister made the list with high scores. After a year, my sister passed the college entrance examination, and my sister came back from college to test subjects that my sister was not good at. The whole process, the teacher knows, but there is nothing he can do. Because they look exactly alike. The famous university where both sisters attended was passed down as a much-told story.

6. My boyfriend works in ICBC and listens to him. A person in charge of monitoring alarm equipment in their ICBC, referred to as A for short, came home from work one night and the leader called to say that the alarm was not turned on and asked him to check it. A ran downstairs in slippers and took a taxi to ICBC. When he arrived, he told the taxi driver to wait for him and come back soon. A ran out of the car, rushed in and slapped the ATM machine, and the alarm went off. A turned around with satisfaction and found that the taxi driver had run away. He didn't want money. ...