Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Wild vegetables in the distance

Wild vegetables in the distance

Recently, when I was idle, I accidentally saw Zhou Zuoren's Hometown Wild Vegetables, which reminded me of the story of myself and wild vegetables.

Vegetable greenhouses were not as common as they are now when I was a child. After winter, vegetables can no longer be seen on the table. The food is cabbage, sauerkraut, potatoes and pickles-even now, my parents who are still in the countryside are still eating these things, because they will not be willing to spend money to buy food all their lives-until spring, cabbage and potatoes have changed their taste, some are sweet and there is not much oil. I don't know how long it will take for the Chinese cabbage and lettuce in the garden to grow tender leaves. In this case, the benefits of wild vegetables are revealed.

At that time, we had a children's song called "On February 2nd, the bitter pockmarked arch covers, and on March 3rd, green hemp plants drilled into the sky", which caused me to bow my head in the hay when I came out in the first month, but I always got nothing. When wild vegetables are first released, why not wait until the first rain in March of the lunar calendar, when the wicker turns green and the grass turns green? A group of children agreed to take a wicker basket out to dig vegetables after school. On the barren slopes facing the sun, you can often turn over the old hay carefully and find their lovely buds. But at this time, most of the wild vegetables are bitter pockmarked seeds, bitter vegetables, horns, sheep beards and women's wives, which are rare. After running for a long time, the harvest is often only one basket. But for us, it is a great pleasure. Everyone laughed and played a game to show off who gouged out more, and didn't go home until dark.

Picking wild vegetables clean and soaking them in clear water can also remove bitterness while cleaning. Before long, the withered wild vegetables stood up again and revived. On this night, a small bowl of homemade sauce and a small pot of green and lovely wild vegetables will be placed on the food table, and the house that has been boring for a winter will be filled with the breath of spring immediately. We children dare not touch the most bitter pitted seeds and the most bitter vegetables. Even my mother seldom touches them, so they are all my father's. My father, who has been pulling a long face, will become lively at this time. When eating, he will wrinkle his whole face and make a bitter expression, which will make the whole family laugh. We children like to eat horns, beards and old ladies, and the best one is the old lady, horns. The slender leaves of the sheep beard have white fluff, which tastes a bit strange. In any case, it is slightly bitter, but it is full of fragrance, which greatly increases people's appetite and unconsciously eats several bowls of rice.

Gradually, there are wild vegetables not only on the sunny slopes, but also in the fields, which are bigger, greener and less bitter. Wait until near April, but at this time, wild vegetables often produce small flowers in Huang Cancan, and they can't be eaten, so they can only be dug out to feed chickens, ducks or pigs.

But at this time, vegetables also came out. In my impression, green hemp can be regarded as the king of wild vegetables. It not only came out late, but also was born in fertile fields, like a meadow where the soil is harder than stones. Its roots are not ugly and hard to chew like other wild vegetables, but white and tender, so it is usually not necessary to pick green hemp vegetables; It is particularly worth mentioning that its taste is very good, not so bitter, almost like small lettuce, and there is lively and splashing game that lettuce does not have.

There is also a joke about green hemp vegetables in China, which tells that a wise man gouged out a small basket and gave it to the county grandfather when green hemp vegetables first appeared in spring. The county magistrate was very happy and gave him twelve taels of silver. A fool saw it, thought that smart people's money was easy to get and wanted to learn. It happened that Xia Tianqing's hemp vegetables grew quite tall and blossomed, so he cut two pickaxes and gave them to the county grandfather, thinking that I shouldn't be rewarded with several hundred taels this time. Who knows that the county grandfather flew into a rage: "Are you feeding the donkey?" Hit him 20 times and kicked him out. My father jokingly said to me, "If you give this small pot of green hemp to the county grandfather, you will definitely get twelve taels of silver." At this time, my brother, who went to middle school, said, "Now someone is going to the city to sell green vegetables. There are so many, you can definitely sell one or two dollars. " I'm glad to hear that, but I'm a little confused: two dollars can buy a lot of lettuce and shallots. Why do city people still eat green vegetables?

I remember one year, my mother wanted to go back to her mother's house, saying that my grandmother told her that she really wanted to eat vegetables when she came home last time. However, because their family is well-off and there is no shortage of food, my cousin asked me if I could get some. I got up early that morning and ran in the fields all morning. Before going to school, I gouged out half a basket and asked my mother to take it back. It has been more than ten years since my grandmother died. She was very kind to me when she was alive, but I never got a chance to repay her. It's just that I did a little filial piety to her, so I remember.

When the vegetables bloom and are given to the county grandfather, the vegetables in the garden will come down, and the bleakest spring will pass.

Later, when I went to middle school, I felt that only children or women dig wild vegetables, so I was embarrassed to dig wild vegetables again. When I entered the county town in high school, I found that there were not only green hemp vegetables but also old ladies in the city, and the price was more expensive than my brother said. Of course, at this time, I already know that the old woman is also called dandelion and can be used as medicine. When I came home from vacation, I asked my teenage cousin, "Did you cut the vegetables?" She curled her lips and said, "Who eats green hemp now? They feed it to ducks. " Although I can't say anything, I feel very sorry in my heart.

Later, I went to college and settled in a big city after graduation. With such a rich vegetable basket, I am getting farther and farther away from wild vegetables. Although people are not old, the more they live, the more melodramatic they are, and they miss wild vegetables. It happens that the house I bought is located in the suburbs, and there is a field behind the building. It pains me to think of wild vegetables. Last spring, I had the cheek to encourage my wife to dig wild vegetables together. But after a long walk, not to mention the green sesame seeds, even the old woman and the bitter hemp seeds can't be found. There is something that looks like the old woman and is everywhere, which makes his wife like a treasure: "You won't shepherd's purse, will you?" Herbicide is used now, and there is no green hemp. It is good to have shepherd's purse. Dig quickly. "This shepherd's purse is a famous wild vegetable. Jason's "Digging shepherd's purse" made its name known to all middle school students. Even Zhou Zuoren repeatedly mentioned it in "Wild Vegetables in Hometown". Unfortunately, it is difficult to match it under a famous name. When I arrived at the door, I found that I was not only behind the green sesame, but even inferior to the old woman, and I was on the same level as the sheep beard. I haven't even eaten green vegetables, but I made a book for shepherd's purse. Think about it. Really feel wronged for such great writers as Jason and Zhou Zuoren.

Of course, I am not qualified to pity these literary masters-the wild vegetables in my hometown are naturally older, but I have not eaten them for more than 20 years; Now, the place where I live is under construction. In the place where we used to vomit shepherd's purse, there will soon be many tall buildings. I won't talk about eating wild vegetables in my hometown in the future, even shepherd's purse is not easy to eat again.

The seemingly insignificant wild vegetables are really getting farther and farther away from me.

Postscript:

The names of wild vegetables vary from place to place. When writing, I just found a word with similar pronunciation according to my hometown dialect. Today, I went online to find my favorite green hemp vegetables, some of which are similar or consistent with our pronunciation, such as sleeping vegetables and mushrooms, which are estimated to be from the north or even the northeast; Some bitter vegetables, or bitter vegetables, are probably northwest; Some of them are called relatively elegant, such as Qucai and even mimosa. It's really the most cultural name I've ever heard about Qingma cuisine, probably from Jiangnan.