What jokes make you laugh until your stomach hurts?

There are twenty jokes that make me laugh until my stomach hurts;

1 As soon as we met, my classmates complained to me that he sweated at night and when he fell asleep. He spent hundreds of hospital examinations. Later, he found an old Chinese doctor and prescribed more than ten pairs of Chinese medicines. It's no use drinking it. It gets worse every day. I asked:? What happened afterwards? How was it cured? ? When I asked this question, I obviously saw my classmate's mouth twitch and said angrily, I changed a thin quilt. ?

My second-class friend came to my house to play, and I gave him a sprite. He took the coffee table and knocked it down by accident. Sprite spilled out. Both things look green. One turned over my desk, grabbed my collar and said, is the fucking water poisonous? ?

Three. I met a big brother in the lake the other day. There is a red carp and a herring on each side of his leg. The fish head on the left is facing up and the fish head on the right is facing down. His face is fierce. This is terrible. At dinner, someone finally asked about the meaning of tattoos. My brother lit a cigarette and said, I was born in March. 1976. /kloc-in March of 0/5, we all pricked up our ears, waiting for the doomed bloody story. Eldest brother picked up a cigarette and said, I am Pisces. ?

4 go to the hospital to consult an expert, is there anything to lose weight without dieting or exercising? Experts say there is. I asked what it was. He said garlic. At first I thought it was wrong. Then I thought that garlic can burn fat and promote metabolism. Experts say garlic can keep people away from you. The farther away, the smaller it looks.

The weak are often bullied at school. He was bullied by his classmates this morning. Being bullied by other classes after school. So one day, he secretly took a rope, ran into the wilderness, hung the rope on a tree, and then

It feels much better to sit on it and swing.

A friend of mine told a fortune teller last year that he was going to have good luck this year and would be deeply hurt by a woman who suddenly appeared. Yesterday he was knocked down by an aunt riding an electric bicycle on the street corner, and now he is still lying in the hospital.

Today, I went to get a haircut. I saw the barber next to me keep saying to a girl, let's get a perm! We have 5800 new packages here. If you heat it, you will look beautiful. I didn't like it then. Isn't this fraud? I stood up when I wiped it. Girl, don't listen to him. Ugly and spicy like you. Not pretty. Then I went out quietly, and the girl kept chasing me, probably to thank me. Ah! You're welcome.

A girl was punished for running laps in the playground for being late for class. Unexpectedly, it rained, so the girl had to run in the rain. This is a boy running with her with an umbrella and moving it to the girl's head. The girl realized that the boy had been staring at her for a long time and her face turned red at once. She whispered:? Sorry, I have a boyfriend. The boy looked down for a while and said to the girl affectionately. Do you want it? This umbrella is ten yuan.

I once went to the hospital because of acute gastroenteritis. My father came to see me and told me anxiously why the hospital couldn't connect to WiFi.

10 is dedicated to the goddess today! She shyly asked me to wait for her at the school gate after school. I can't believe that happiness comes so suddenly! The long wait passed, and the moment I saw her figure, I slipped away quietly. I hate my cowardice. I hate that little man with a knife and a big gold chain in his hand.

1 1 It's raining outside the window. She looked at me with her eyes. ? Go and see your parents. ? I can't help but feel shocked. For the first time in such a long time, she said such a thing to me. Tears welled up in my eyes and I choked. I asked tentatively:? A little early? ? She was even a little excited: How dare you bargain! You haven't handed in your homework for two days! Call your parents.

12 After school, I went to the Internet cafe with some classmates. As a result, my father caught me playing. When I got home, my father whispered, I'm sweating. Let's take a bath first. Suddenly I felt that spring was coming, so I went to take a shower. As soon as he undressed, his father kicked bathroom door with a whip: Son of a bitch! I usually tell you to take off your clothes. I broke your memory this time!

13 My friend came to see me from the northeast. A group of 6 people can't fit in one car! So I stopped another taxi to show them the way! Tell them repeatedly to stay close so as not to get lost! After getting on the bus, I said to master. Master, someone is following me.