Marginal joke

B: "Yes."

Why do Haier brothers only wear underpants? Because they don't have Q coins!

The son asked his father, "Am I a stupid child?" . Dad said, "silly boy, you are so stupid!" " " .

The customer was surprised and said, "Your thumb is soaked in my soup."

The waiter said, "Nothing, I'm used to it. Not hot. "

On the 34l bus, it is very crowded.

I saw a man and a woman near the door. The man was wearing a pair of glasses and carrying a leather bag. He looked embarrassed, and she was a standard OL. Two people chatting unscrupulously:

Man: Your husband is not at home tonight, is he? It's much quieter here ...

W: Well, he's out of town all week.

Man: So we can play tonight? (Uncle next door turns to look ..)

W: What do you want to play? (Aunt next door also turned her head ..)

M: As usual, I'll get a room (the middle school students next door also turn around ...)

Woman: Hey, I won't come if you check in, or I will (everyone is surprised ...)

Man: OK, you drive, I'll come in and kill you (people around you take a breath ...)

Woman: I think I am a bully, saying that I don't know which one to take, and I can't stand it and don't want to beg for mercy (BS shines in the eyes of the masses).

Man: No matter how fierce I am, I can only accompany you 1 hour, and I have to accompany my girlfriend at night (there is a murder in the carriage ...)

Woman: Ask her to play with me (dizzy ...)

Man: She can only fight landlords, but can't play bubble hall. ....

There was a traffic accident, and many people were watching it, but a reporter couldn't squeeze in. He had a brainwave and shouted, "I am the son of the injured, please make way!" " "As expected, all the onlookers got out of the way. The reporter looked over and saw that it was a dog that was crushed to death.

Eight most disgusting jokes in history

First, when I was a child, I ate dishonestly. In order to educate me, an old farmer said to me, "60 years of hard work, no food to eat, never throwing out snot and feces." .

Second, there is a rich man looking for a servant. The topic of the interview is going to the toilet. After several times, he came out without washing his hands.

The rich man sent them away, but only one washed his hands and the rich man left him behind. But one day,

The rich man found himself out without washing his hands.

The rich man asked him why the servant replied, "I brought toilet paper today ..."

A man saw a big sale in a shop and went in. "What do you want?" "I want to buy dog food."

"We have a rule that you must prove that you have a dog."

"Where is such a rule?" "This is the case with goods on sale." The man spent a long time bargaining with the salesman.

The salesman still refused to sell it to him. No way, the man had to go home and bring the dog before buying dog food. A few days later,

The man went to this shop to buy cat food again. "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have regulations, you must prove that you have a cat.

"It's the same salesman, the man mixed up with her for a long time. As a result, he still has to go home and take the cat to buy cat food.

A few days later, the man came to the shop with a big cardboard box with a hole and found the salesman. "What do you want?"

"Just put your hand in and you'll know." The salesman put his hand in: "What is it? Very sticky. " "I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

A man and a friend went to visit his grandmother. While he was talking to his grandmother, his friends began to eat peanuts on the coffee table.

Eat all the peanuts. When they left, his friend said to his grandmother, "Thank you for the peanuts."

Grandma responded, "Oh! Hmm! Alas! Because all my teeth have fallen out, I can only suck out the chocolate. Old, cough. . .

Some people like the dish "spicy vermicelli pot" very much. Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again. But the waiter told him,

This dish has been sold out. "Is it really sold out?" He asked in disappointment. "Sir, really sold out. You see,

The last copy was sold to the gentleman at that table. "The waiter replied. According to the waiter's instructions, the man saw a very decent gentleman sitting next to him.

The gentleman's food has been eaten almost, but the "spicy vermicelli pot" is still full. This man thinks that gentlemen waste delicious food,

So he walked up to the gentleman, pointed to the "spicy vermicelli pot" and asked politely, "Do you want more, sir?"

The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, I swallowed half of it.

Suddenly, he found a little mouse lying at the bottom of the casserole, but its hair had grown completely. A fit of nausea,

The man vomited all the fans he had eaten back into the casserole. When he turned his stomach there,

The gentleman looked at him sympathetically and said, "Isn't it disgusting?" I'm like this ... "

6. On this day, the hotel owner is patrolling the lobby. A beggar came forward and said, "Can the boss give me a toothpick?"

The boss gave him one and sent it away. After a while, another beggar came and asked for a toothpick.

The boss thought, why do beggars want toothpicks instead of rice now? I also gave him one to send away, not too old, and another beggar came.

The boss said to him, "Are you here to get a toothpick, too?" The beggar said, "Someone threw up and I came late."

The first two beggars ate everything they could, and now there is only soup left. Can you give me a straw?

Seven, boss, the second flight, the second airsickness, vomiting. A bag is full, so the boss has to get it.

When he came back, he found that the whole plane was vomiting. The boss asked why, and the second said, "I see this bag is full, too."

I had to drink half a bag again, and I threw up. "

If you haven't spit it out, I have to admit that you are a master, so I will try my best.

Eight, one day the boss and the second went to the theater to see the play, and saw them arguing about the plot development halfway.

Take a gamble. The boss pointed to a row of spittoons in front of him and said, "The loser needs a taste of what's there.

"Unfortunately, the boss lost, so the boss took a sip with a frown. The two went on to bet on the next plot. This time, the second child lost.

I saw the second child pick up the spittoon and swallow fifteen mouthfuls in one gulp. Eldest brother frightened to disgrace, admire passionate admiration, said to the second child.

"You are amazing, you can drink fifteen mouthfuls in a row!"

The second one shook his head. "I don't want to drink. The sputum in that spittoon is so thick that I really can't stop biting.