Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Why didn't anyone help Chongzhen eight days before he committed suicide?

Why didn't anyone help Chongzhen eight days before he committed suicide?

In times of national disaster, all people should unite, get rich and make contributions.

But for Emperor Chongzhen of the Ming Dynasty, these slogans were just a joke. China is only its own country, and money is the life of those people.

After Yuan Chonghuan's death, the last straw of the Ming Dynasty was destroyed, but Emperor Chongzhen still hoped to make a final effort for Zhu Jiaguo.

He put down his respect for the emperor and went to the ministers and relatives one by one to ask for donations and pay the soldiers who defended Beijing.

But he never expected the final result: everyone was penniless, pretending to be crazy and crying.

At that time, Chongzhen decided to donate 30,000 yuan, which is roughly, you see, I know you have money, but I don't want much, just 30,000 yuan. I'll give you the first prize if each of you pays 30 thousand.

Unfortunately, no one donated enough. Most people donate dozens or hundreds just for Chongzhen. What's more, some people took their own pots and pans to the streets to practice stalls, and some people posted "This house is in urgent need" on the door of the mansion. ...

Of course, not everyone is so greedy for money, regardless of righteousness. At that time, a 60-year-old man came to Hubu, shed tears and donated 400 taels of silver accumulated in his life.

Maybe, as we said, rich people don't necessarily have feelings. In times of crisis, what touches you the most is always the people you looked down upon before.

Although Chongzhen's heart is bleeding, there is nothing he can do. He can only continue to seek help, and Dont Ask For Help and China will cease to exist.

Finally, he targeted his father-in-law Zhou Kui. Zhou Kui is a state official, so he can't be without money. Chongzhen thought, after all, he is the father-in-law, and he is also a member of the family. How could he have a problem with * * *?

At that time, Chongzhen asked Zhou Kui to donate100000! When Zhou Kui heard this number, his heart almost collapsed. Damn, all this money is my coffin book. How can you donate it if you say it?

He took the little eunuch who came to the door and cried with a runny nose and tears: Emperor, how can I have so much money? Look at the clothes I'm wearing, how rotten they are!

Then show the little eunuch his rice. You can only eat moldy rice.

But after all, it is the abbot of the country, and it is difficult not to donate. He said to Chongzhen, I only have 12 thousand. Do you want it or not?

At this time, there are still eight days before Beijing was broken and Chongzhen committed suicide.

After all, 10 thousand is too little. He bargained with his father-in-law: father-in-law, donate 20 thousand. How about giving me a lot of money after I spent this crisis in the Ming Dynasty?

Zhou Kui is not stupid either. What he thinks is that if the money is given up, it will be dead.

He had to find his daughter, Queen Zhou. She was a good person. She also hopes that her father can understand the righteousness and set an example. At that time, she gave her father the 5000 taels that Emperor Chongzhen usually gave her, but, ah, Zhou Kui did another wonderful thing: he donated 3000 taels, and another 2000 taels fell into his pocket. In the end, he donated a total of 1.32 million yuan.

The money is only nine Niu Yi cents for Chongzhen. Too little, too little indeed. Because no one donated money. Why didn't anyone donate? In our words today, I got the money on my own. Why should I take it out?

At that time, Chongzhen only hoped to raise the salary of two hundred thousand. Maybe with this 200 thousand contribution, the ending will be different. Who would have thought?

Until the death of Chongzhen, this 200,000 was not raised. For Chongzhen, this is the sorrow of being an emperor. There is probably no emperor in history who asked his subordinates for money.

But Chongzhen is really poor, and he has no choice! By the time Chongzhen took over the Ming Dynasty, this superpower had been eaten away by some moths of the dynasty. According to historical records, at that time, the national treasury of the Ming Dynasty only added up to more than 2,300 yuan. It is precisely because of poverty that there are not enough maids who dare not expand their enrollment. He even paid for the gold and silver utensils in the palace and the copper pots in the hall. Later, Chongzhen also sold the ginseng and other items stored in the palace.

The Ming dynasty seems to be a mess, and the monarch and his subjects are just playing a game of crying for poverty. Everyone has a steelyard in his heart.

However, this world belongs to Zhujiajian! And the money is private.

Three days before the city was broken, Chongzhen sat feebly in the dragon chair. He called Wei Zaode, the last record of the Ming Dynasty at that time, and asked: Are there any other countermeasures? As long as you have it, I will try my best to do it for you.

Wei Zaode word, chongzhen kicked the dragon chair.

Three days later, Chongzhen hanged himself in Jingshan Park, and Wei Zaode surrendered.

What is even more chilling is that when Li Zicheng asked him why he didn't follow Chongzhen, the man brazenly said that the new dynasty had just been established and talents were definitely needed. I can't just die.

But can these poor people gain a foothold in the new dynasty and continue to enjoy prosperity?

The demise of the Ming Dynasty brought about a brutal war for more than ten years. After Li Zicheng finished the Ming Dynasty, Wu Sangui brought the Qing army into the customs and needed more money. Where did the money come from, or these misers?

But Li Zicheng is not Chongzhen, and he won't beg them. He has only one order: kill if you don't give money!

Wei Dezao wanted to surrender, but Li Zicheng wouldn't let him. He put him in prison and tortured him. Finally, under the threat of a stick being cut off, he handed over tens of thousands of pieces of silver. After five days and nights of torture, Wei Zaode died in prison because of a split brain.

Wei Dezao's death was a blow to these relics of the Ming Dynasty. Chongzhen treated them like human beings, but Li Zicheng didn't. So when torture was about to befall him, he obediently presented his family money with both hands.

Chen Yan, a poor Daming etiquette, offered to hand over 42,000 pieces of silver to help pay.

Zhou Kui, the abbot of the country, cried and shouted at the beginning, a miser who only offered 65438+2000 taels of silver. He couldn't help being tortured. He was copied by the army and pulled dozens of cars. Cash alone is as much as 532,000 yuan.

This time, King Li Zicheng got more than 70 million yuan of silver from the elders of the Ming Dynasty and finally shipped it to Xi 'an.

Will there be good days? Where is the country broken? Li Zicheng decided to kill all the officials in order to prevent the Ming army from insurrection when it attacked Wu Sangui. In those few days, between the capitals, sticks flew, were branded with tendons, gouged out their eyes and cut their intestines, and the miserable cries of Ming officials rang out everywhere.

Only these people, finally have the face to see the emperor chongzhen?