9 meaningful jokes

The professor and the farmer sat face to face on the train, which was boring.

The professor said, I have a question. If you don't know, give 5 yuan. If you have a problem, if I don't know, how about giving it to 500 yuan?

Farmers agree.

The professor asked: How far is the moon from the earth? Without saying anything, the farmer handed the money to Professor 5 yuan.

The farmer asked: what animal is going up the mountain with three legs and down the mountain with four legs?

The professor had no choice but to give it to the farmer 500 yuan. The farmer took the money and prepared to go to bed.

The professor asked: what animal is it that goes up the mountain with three legs and down the mountain with four legs? Without saying a word, the farmer handed the money to Professor 5 yuan and went to bed.

Only by respecting others can you gain their respect.

02

Grandpa retired and enrolled in the university for the aged.

The grandson of the first grade asked curiously, "Grandpa, are you still studying?" Grandpa said, "What happened to my reading?"

Sun Tzu said, "Good is good, that is, what would you do if your school informed you to hold a parent-teacher conference?" ......

Never mind what didn't happen, just live in the present!

03

Crabs went on the market and had a meal. There are three tables at the banquet, one for the leaders and two for the employees.

The hairy crabs on the leadership desk are wild and very small, while the hairy crabs on the staff desk are artificially raised and very large.

The leader didn't know the inside story and was very angry: "How is the office arranged? Why do we eat crabs smaller than employees? "

The director of the office is an honest man, so he quickly came out and explained, "They were carried by people, but yours was not."

Understanding the essence of things through their appearances is the practice of high emotional intelligence.

04

An old man went to see a doctor. The doctor prescribed him a medicine and said to him, "This medicine will last for twelve hours."

The old man nodded and left with a smile. The old man laughed as he walked, and kept laughing when he got home.

The family was surprised and asked, "What's wrong with you?" The old man said, "What medicine did the doctor prescribe? I'm going to laugh for twelve hours. I'm exhausted! " "

Ask in time if you don't understand, otherwise you will suffer yourself and miss others.

05

Xiao Wang works in the personnel department on 10 floor. A month ago, he was transferred to the administrative department on the ninth floor.

Today, Xiao Wang called the personnel department to find him: "Is Xiao Wang there?"

The colleague who answered the phone said, "Xiao Wang is no longer in the personnel."

Xiao Wang: "Ah? ! When did this happen? Why don't I know? I haven't had time to see him off yet? "

"It doesn't matter, you can go to the following to find him ..."

Words cannot convey their meaning, which often leads to misleading results. Look before you leap.

06

Two women quarreled in the office, and the manager couldn't bear it: "What's the quarrel? Say the reason! "

Hearing this, the two women struggled to keep their words.

"That's enough!" The manager roared, "The ugly comes first!"

Suddenly the world is quiet!

It takes wisdom to persuade a fight, and it takes less than ten years to smile ~

07

At noon, a beautiful woman went to withdraw money. After inserting the card, she found the man behind her staring at her, and her heart tightened. She entered the password several times and didn't even take out the money.

He shouted angrily to the man behind him, "What are you looking at? what are you reading? Do you want to grab it? "

The man behind me did not show weakness: "I just want to see how much money you can take out by inserting your ID card.

A lot of things need to be seen with your heart, but what your eyes see is not the truth.

08

Husband: Honey, I just bought 15 yuan fruit.

Wife: Then what?

Husband: I gave it to the boss 100, and the idiot gave me 95, haha.

You said he was second to none? I am running.

Wife: What about the fruit?

Husband: I forgot to take it

Sometimes I feel smart, but I didn't expect to be cheated by cleverness ~

09

3-year-old girl is disobedient

Her mother said, if you don't listen, throw you out and pick up another one.

After a short silence, the little girl whispered, the child you picked up won't listen, because nobody fucking wants it!

Thinking from another angle may have unexpected results.