Jokes about gratitude

John in San Francisco called his son David, who was working in New York.

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable, but I have to tell you the news---your mother and I have agreed to divorce. We have had enough of 45 years of suffering." John's voice said Some sense of loss.

"Oh my God! What are you talking about? Dad?" David was shocked.

"There's nothing we can do about it. We don't even want to look at each other now," John sighed, and then said: "We hate each other, and I hate mentioning it again, Su It's up to you to tell Shan." After saying that, John hung up the phone.

David immediately called his sister in Chicago: "Susan, you must calm down. Listen, my parents want a divorce. What should I do?"

"What? ! God! We have to go back and stop them!" Susan screamed on the phone.

After hanging up the phone from her brother, Susan immediately dialed the phone at home, and it was John who answered the phone.

"You are not allowed to talk about divorce! You are not allowed to mess around! Everything has to wait until David and I come back before making plans. We will arrive tomorrow and we will make plans then. Don't be impulsive! Do you hear me?" Susan finished yelling and hung up the phone.

John put down the phone, turned to his wife and said, "Okay, they can come back for Thanksgiving, but what shall we say about Christmas?" During Thanksgiving, a gentleman came to the church dejected and lifeless. , sitting in front of the pastor, he complained to the pastor: "They say you should express your gratitude to God during Thanksgiving. Now I have nothing. I have been unemployed for more than half a year. I have looked for a job more than 10 times, but no one is using me. I There is nothing to be thankful for!” The pastor asked him: “Do you really have nothing? God is merciful and God still loves you. Don’t you think so? Let me give you a piece of paper and a pen. Please record your answers, okay?"

1: The pastor asked him: "Do you have a wife?"

He replied: "I have a wife, but she doesn't care about me. Even though she still loved me, I felt even more guilty."

2: The pastor asked him: "Do you have children?"

< p>He replied: "I have children, five lovely children. Although I cannot let them eat the best food and receive the best education, the children are very competitive."

3: Pastor Asked him: "Do you have a good appetite?"

He replied: "Oh, I have a great appetite. Since I don't have much money, I can't satisfy my appetite to the maximum extent. I often only eat 70% full. ."

4: The pastor asked him: "How do you sleep?"

He replied: "Hehe, I sleep well when I touch the pillow. ”

5: The pastor asked him: “Do you have any friends?”

He replied: “I have friends, because I am unemployed, and they help me from time to time. ! And I can't repay them."

6: The priest asked him: "How is your eyesight?"

He replied: "My eyesight is very good, I can see clearly. Objects far away"

So he recorded these 6 items on the paper: 1 I have a good wife 2 I have 5 good children 3 I have a good appetite 4 I have a good sleep 5 I I have good friends 6 I have good eyesight

The pastor listened to him read the above 6 items once and said: "Congratulations! Thank you to our God, how He has blessed you and blessed you! You Go back and remember to be grateful!"

He returned home, meditating on the conversation and looking in the long-lost mirror: "Ah, how messy and depressed I am! It looked like a scrub brush, and the clothes were a little dirty..."

Later, with a heart full of thanks to God and a lot of energy, he found a good job