A joke that you can't speak Mandarin well.

A joke that you can't speak Mandarin well.

1, a rural primary school is in class, and the teacher walks into the classroom: "Stand (sit in) for class." The students said with one voice: "It's good to be old and dead!" The teacher said, "Students, it's good to die early!" "

2. A country girl came to the supermarket, and the waiter greeted her warmly: "What do you want, miss?" The girl said, "I want your life (noodles), pig grandson (bamboo shoots)."

Chunhua met a friend who went shopping with her son. She rushed forward to say hello and boasted, "This little wolf boy (boy) is really cute."

Two country girls came back from the city. It's getting late. When they saw a truck coming, they waved to it. The driver stuck his head out. A girl said, "Comrade, can we be your wife (car)?" The driver said angrily, "Who wants you to be my wife?" Another girl quickly said, "It doesn't matter, we are very close." The driver was so angry that he drove away and thought, "Who will go with you?"

The village head said at the villagers' meeting, "Rabbits, shrimps and pickles are too expensive, not pickles, but pig's feet." Translate his dialect into Mandarin: Comrades and villagers, let's have a meeting now. Don't talk, but pay attention.

6. Xiao Xie is a shop assistant in a savings office, and her Mandarin is not standard.

One day, a group of aunts lined up at the window. She saw an aunt with money and a passbook in her hand. She said, Aunt, are you in love?

Aunt said:? Little sister, I am innocent. I have never had the idea of cheating in my life. ?

Aunt next door has money, she asked? Aunt, what are you going to do?

Aunt said:? I want to send money to someone. ?

She said:? If you want to meet a lover, what is his card number?

Aunt said:? I have no lover, sister. ?

She said:? I didn't mean that. I know you want to stimulate (send) love (money). ?

Aunt said:? I see. You let it go? Money? Send? Love? Yes ?

7. The village head said at the villagers' meeting, "Rabbits, shrimps and pickles are too expensive, not pickles, but pig's feet." Translate his dialect into Mandarin: Comrades and villagers, let's have a meeting now. Don't talk, but pay attention.

8. A young teacher who just graduated went to the office to consult an old teacher. As soon as he entered the office, he found the old teacher drawing lines on the paper. When he had some questions, he asked, Teacher, what are you doing? Hearing this, the old teacher thought he was speaking Mandarin. I'd better answer him in mandarin, too, and say,? I'm making a watch (bitch) .

9. A student violated discipline and was called to the office by the class teacher. After some education (educating students in Putonghua), the student not only refused to repent, but also confidently contradicted the teacher, which made the class teacher very angry. If you zhe zhe again, I will give you two big mouths. ?

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