Who can tell jokes? Thank god, help me.

An ant saw an elephant coming towards him. He buried himself in the soil, but only one faded. The rabbit asked him why, and he said, shh, don't make any noise, I'll kill that son of a bitch! The next day, the rabbit saw an elephant bury itself in the soil, leaving only one leg exposed. Curiously, he asked why the elephant's eyes suddenly filled with tears and curled his mouth in injustice: "Yesterday, that damn ant smashed my brother into a plant elephant, and I want to avenge my brother!" At least mix him with schizophrenia! "The rabbit met an ant who came in a hurry on the road, and kindly asked it to avoid the elephant. The ant scoffed: "Damn elephant, it's really unappreciative! Let him pat his ass and walk like an elephant! Be careful that I'm not polite to him! Run wild in my territory! "As a result, the ant walked over angrily and tripped the elephant's exposed feet as soon as he lifted his feet! It turned out that this ant was imported, and the elephant said, "I am convinced!" After all, even the moon in the United States is rounder than that in China, and so are ants! "Ants make elephants miserable. At night, the rabbit saw ants passing by his door in droves. The rabbit quickly asked one of the ants, "What are you doing with so many ants?" "The ant replied," The elephant is injured and needs blood transfusion in the hospital. Let's donate blood for the elephant! " "Rabbit:! ? ￥.-**"。 The next morning, the rabbit saw the ants striding back. He asked one of the ants, "why are you all back?" "Ant:" tmd, there are so many brothers whose blood types are different from those of elephants. Only one ant has the right blood type, so we left him to donate blood, and we came back ~! " The rabbit fainted after hearing this .. Before long, the elephant was discharged from the hospital. It gathered all its brothers and sisters and peed in all the ant holes it could see. After seeing it, the rabbit was puzzled: "The ant kindly donated blood to you. Why did you bite and feed your hand?" The elephant said angrily, "this is the most poisonous trick of ants." The ants who donate blood have AIDS ... "The next day, the rabbit found that a large number of ants died and ran over to ask. Ant cloud: "The elephant that urinates is from Beijing. It has SARS!" " "In retaliation, a 5-year-old child went to a five-star hotel, and his manager said," Find me a lady. " The manager said, "We are a five-star hotel with no ladies." So the child threw out 5000 yuan and said, "Is there a lady?" The manager said, "Yes." The child said, "I want to be sick." The manager said, "Our five-star is not sick." The child threw out 5000 yuan and said, "Find me a sick one." The manager said, "Some of them are sick." The child asked the manager, "I slept with a sick lady." Am I sick, too? " The manager is afraid to speak. The child threw out 5000 and said, "am I sick, too?" The manager said, "that didn't run." I definitely did it. " The child said, "Then I did it with our nanny. Is our nanny also sick? " The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. " The child said, "Then our nanny had sex with my father. Is my father sick too? " The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. " The child said, "Then my father and mother did it, so is my mother sick?" The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. " The child said, "Then my mother fucked our driver. Is the driver sick? " The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. " The child thought about it, patted the table and said, "Hum! Smelly driver, I let you crush my little frog. " Rogue son's school leave! ! Miss Wang: Hello. I want to ask for leave. I didn't want to, but my father was cut off yesterday for collecting protection money. I can't find any staff today, so he asked me to make up the number. Miss Wang, please rest assured that I won't be cut with a knife. Although I was only in Grade Two, I had a fight with Xiao Qiang in the next class last year. He was in the fifth grade at that time. Finally, I dragged him into the hospital and got eight stitches. Hospitalization 1 week. I went easy on him at that time. My father said that if you find fault with others, you must work hard, so I took Xiao Qiang to the hospital according to my father's persuasive instructions. So please rest assured that I won't let you lose face. By the way, Mr. Wang, if someone bullies you, please tell me my name. My name is in this area. Who listened? Give me three points. If they don't give you face, you can give my dad's name and see who dares to touch you. Miss Wang, I will come back to school as soon as I help my father. If the headmaster comes and finds me out, don't tell him. Because my dad was cut by that son of a bitch principal yesterday. Miss Wang, please rest assured that I will remember your words. I won't go easy on you. If I don't come back within two hours, please ask Mr. Wang to call the hospital and get some notes. Miss Wang, please believe me, I will return home in triumph. I must help my father out of this tone. I'm sure you will also speak for my father. A family of six lives entirely on his protection money. Now that someone is making trouble, it's time for me to show my face Besides, if I don't cut down that son of a bitch, the principal thinks my family is easy to bully and will cut off my family's financial resources. I went ... brother ... no ... we were ... she still remembers that day ... there was a test today, so I went home early. When I got home, I had already come back. I seem to be thinking. I was in a daze (maybe hungry). Brother, are you hungry? I'll get the rice and eat it later ... (My brother didn't reply to her) She went to the kitchen to prepare cooking. After a while, there seems to be someone behind her. Looking back, I suddenly appeared behind her. Whoo! Brother, will you make a sound next time? You scared me to death (strange! At this moment, I suddenly grabbed her hand and she got a fright. He slowly took that out at this moment, and when she saw it, she knew what had happened. She's been struggling ... no! We are brother and sister ... if mom knew ... but I kept begging her not to listen. She is dizzy and seems to have lost her judgment. She regretted making a serious mistake in such a daze ... but she was afraid to tell her mother ... so she said to me ... brother! Next time you force me to sign your failed test paper, I'll tell my mother ... (I want to hit the wall for five minutes ...)