A stranger.

A soldier is practicing climbing a tree. Suddenly, he fell from the tree. The officer asked him why he fell. He said two squirrels ran into his crotch. I put up with it, and they went in and said, let's share the fruit …

The doctor asked the patient how he broke his bone. The patient said, I felt sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes with a telephone pole. A fucking asshole passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he picked up a stick and gave me two!

When it was still buzzing in the morning, the mobile phone vibrated. I took it and pressed the answer key: hello! Hello! Hello? Hello? ! Who are you? Can I help you? Talk to me! Kao! Press the hang-up button, I was very angry and said, look who the caller is. When I saw it, it was a text message ... er ~

When I was in junior high school, a boy I liked at the front desk suddenly turned to me and said, "10 years later, I will definitely come back and marry you." As soon as I heard this, my face turned red and I played better with him, but I didn't expect him to say so. .

Then, he went on to say, "Come back and kill you." . Ha ha "for so many years, think about all speechless.

After working in $ TERM company, several computers got together to fight the landlord, and the water dispenser also played. He loses every time, but he still insists on taking part every day. The sofa didn't understand, so she asked the chair, "The water dispenser is lost every day. Why are you still playing so hard? " ? The chairman said, "Are you out of your mind to ask such a question?

There are five eggs in the refrigerator. The first said to the second: Hey ~ Look ~ The fifth egg has Mao Mao ~ ~ It's terrible ~!

The second said to the third: Hey ~ Look ~ The fifth egg has Mao Mao ~ ~ It's terrible, it's terrible ~!

The third said to the fourth: Hey ~ Look ~ The fifth egg has Mao Mao. ...

The fifth egg heard it: get out ~! Lao zi is kiwi fruit ~! ! !

A man was starving in the desert when he found the magic lamp. Magic lamp: "I can only realize your one wish." Hurry up, I'm in a hurry. " Man: "I want a wife ..." The magic lamp immediately conjured up a beautiful woman, and then disdained to say: "I am starving and covet beauty! Pathetic! " Then he disappeared. Man: "... cake."

The happiest thing: sleep until you wake up naturally, and count the money until your hand cramps. The saddest thing: sleep until your hand cramps, and count the money until you wake up naturally.

A group of foreigners were shopping in China and found a sign at the door that said "Be careful skating". The international students laughed. People in China are really interesting. They regard this place as a roller skating rink. Let's skate carefully!

Bin Laden sent a letter to Bush: qs-IHSIN. Bush couldn't understand it, and the FBI couldn't help it, so he sent it to the sixth place in Britain. The answer is: President, you read it backwards in Chinese Pinyin!

Put the notebook on the table first, and then put your chin on the notebook. Well, this is my gift to you-a notebook to pad your brain!

One day, Xiaoming's mother gave him thirty yuan and said, Go and study art.

Xiaoming went to a construction factory to visit a worker's uncle. The worker's uncle said, "As soon as something bad happens, the house will fall down." . Xiao Ming said: Uncle, say it again and I will give it to you 10 yuan. If something bad happens, the house will fall down. '

She saw another aunt, who said; Where to go streaking? He gave his aunt another ten yuan.

After a while, he saw an old man coaxing a child. The old man said, if you hit grandpa again, grandpa won't buy you a pineapple to eat.

When he got home, he shouted: no good. The house will collapse. Mom who is taking a bath says, ah, the house is falling down?

He said again: streaking where. Mother stretched out her hand to hit him. He also said that you were beating grandpa, and grandpa wouldn't buy you a pineapple to eat.

When I went to the toilet, I saw that only the abbreviation of NC was marked on the toilet door. The English expert who went with me said: NC is a men's room. Then suddenly enlightened, enter, take off, squat, in one go, suddenly flashed, what is the abbreviation of the ladies' room? ...

One day, the teacher asked Xiaoming to answer a question in class. Small can't talk. The teacher was anxious: "you won't, you ... you ... you scream!" " "So Xiao Ming said," cheep. "

A person always farts at work, and colleagues can't help but say, can you be quiet? Then I saw him sitting there trembling. Colleagues asked him what he was doing, and he replied, I am tuned to vibration now!

Someone was riding a bicycle and heard a passerby shout: Go, Go, Go … I thought, Damn it, I can sing: Ole Ole…… I plunged into the ditch without saying anything. Passers-by scolded: Shit! Let me tell you something, Gou Gou, do you still ride horses? ! You deserve to fall to death!

The spider loves the ant deeply, but when she expresses her love, she is rejected. The spider roared, "Why? Why is this? " The ant said timidly, "My mother said that people who surf the Internet all day are not good people!" " "

A bird keeper teaches a parrot to speak. Every morning, he must be taught to say, Good morning! After several months, the parrot still didn't speak. One day, the man was in a bad mood and didn't say hello. He just heard the parrot shout, your boy is awesome today, and he didn't even ask if he was good or not!

A diner deliberately made things difficult for the store and ordered a scrambled egg with duck eggs. I just heard Xiao er yelling in the kitchen: the guest officer who is reading SMS is an asshole.