rich joke

1. The boat of friendship will turn over when it is said, and the boat of love will sink when it is said. Only canoes in single dog can stand.

When Valentine's Day arrived, I asked my wife what I should give you. My wife says you can give me anything, as long as it's from you, I like it. I thought it over carefully and said to her, "I'll take you back to your parents!" " "

3. Those who spend the night are called hotels, and those who drink are called nightclubs. Is the name taken backwards?

Sometimes, if you don't have a serious relationship, you have no idea how cool a person is.

When I was a child, I played football on the playground. When I kicked it, the ball flew over the headmaster's head and took him to the hospital. After examination, the doctor found that the headmaster had a malignant tumor in his head and decided to die a month late. The end of the matter was that the headmaster praised me for playing well and I joined the school football team.

At present, the only thing that can be put down is chopsticks, and the only thing that can't be put down is the bed.

7. "Say something heavy, such as your weight!" After a moment's silence, my sister replied, "This is too heavy. Say something superficial, such as your IQ!" " "

8. When people say that they are going to bed, they actually want to lie in bed and play with their mobile phones. If they get up, they will also sit on the toilet and play with their mobile phones.

9. My dream is to save one million, but now I have finished half of it and saved one hundred.

10. I chased my girlfriend and went to her house at night, but she didn't want to. Her finger was caught in the door and it was badly caught. She just didn't hold hands and squeeze in, and her eyes were quite firm; Now she won't let me go out to play at night. After going out, her front foot was caught by the door and her mouth was full of mud. She just climbed out, her eyes full of longing for freedom.

1 1. There are many ways to destroy friendship, and the most thorough way is to borrow money.

12. I was taught from an early age not to spend money indiscriminately. When I grew up, I found that there was no money for me to spend.

13. I have seen cigarette butts in public toilets, and these are weak! I went into the public toilet today, and there was a pile of melon seeds in front of the pit. Damn it, the realm is too high!

14. If you can't get something, you can either fight for it or accept it. If you can't eat grapes, you are hiding your incompetence.

15. Now you scold me because you don't know me yet. When you get to know me better, I promise you will hit me.

16. ancient robbery: I opened this mountain and planted this tree. If you want to pass by, stay and buy the toll. After hundreds of years of civilization baptism, in today's society, robbery is like this: 500 meters in front of the toll booth, please slow down.

17. Go after the person you like bravely, so that you will know that there is more than one person who refuses you.

18. Remember, dear, the good-looking ones are called coquetry, and the ugly ones are called running wild.

There is nothing to be happy about/kloc-birthdays after 0/9.25. At the age of 35, those who can't cry on their birthday are the strong ones in life.

20. If the speed of the teacher's lecture is compared to a 4G signal, then Xueba is connected to wifi, others receive it with a 3G network, and others receive it with a 2G network, and I will be disconnected!

2 1. If you suffer, your heart will be blocked even more.

22. I used to have eight abdominal muscles, but I was possessed when I was practicing the ninth one.

23. Nothing is difficult in the world, if you put your mind to it; Birds of a feather flock together.

24. I heard that these four kinds of girls are hard to find a partner. First, they won't be spoiled and cute. Second, they are people with backbone. Third, they are more homely. Fourth, they don't like makeup. When I learned the truth, I petrified in an instant.

25. Fat voice: Enjoy your mouth, but want to be thin in your heart.

26. Some people say you are like a monkey, others say you are like a pig, and they are still arguing. They really went too far! You look like a monkey, but your brain is like a pig!

27. I am different from others. I don't need money to solve anything that can be solved with money, because I have no money.

At the end of TV, the hero and heroine got married, which shows a profound truth. As long as they get married, there is no future.

I'm getting married, but I haven't bought any furniture yet. My mother secretly told me: you can't buy a bed one meter eight, buy one meter five. In case of quarrel in the future, the bed is too big and everyone sleeps separately. A smaller bed is better. I just want to say, mom, you are so naive. Do you think I can sleep after the quarrel?

30. Who says I can't keep doing things? I have been single for 30 years and never wavered.