In those years, when I was making an "inverted door"

My name is Chen Dadan. I have no parents since I was a child. I can be said to be an orphan.

However, I am not unhappy. On the contrary, I have a good time every day. Usually in the village, I either eat and drink in this room or in that room.

Because, young and super thick-skinned, it is estimated to be comparable to the Great Wall of Wan Li. Even if they kicked me out, kicked me out or even hit me, I always smiled and never got angry with them.

As the saying goes, "I can't see my fingers." I am like a pug. When it's time to eat, I will go door to door on time and always get food.

Of course, I didn't eat for free. Sometimes, the widow of the Zhang family will have backache and leg pain. I will spare no effort to exert Lei Feng's "nail" spirit and rub her waist and legs.

Take advantage of her, waist and glistening thighs make my mouth water. You said that if I didn't touch it, I was really sorry for my hard work.

Sometimes I will focus on helping Xiangling in Liu Jia, the village flower in our village. She looks like the star in the New Year pictures, and her long black and soft hair hangs over her shoulders like a waterfall. Under the slender arch eyebrows, there are a pair of attractive peach eyes, and the small mouth is as red as a freshly ripe cherry, which makes people can't help but take a bite.

Every night before I go to bed, I will trample her in my mind. Really worried, more worried than my dead parents.

"That girl doesn't love spring, and that boy is not affectionate!" This is the most reasonable thing I have ever heard. Women and men are the same, very coquettish. Women are dark coquettish, with a wicked heart and no thief's guts. Men are bright coquettish, with a wicked heart and thief's guts, but they just don't understand women and can't fathom them.

I heard all this from Mei Zheng, a poor scholar in the village. That boy is full of something. He is not afraid of hooligans, but he is afraid of hooligans. I've seen it.

At the age of eighteen, my beard grew, my Adam's apple grew, and even the things under me grew beautiful Mao Mao. I thought there was something wrong with my health, so I went to Mei Zheng Zheng immediately.

He smiled back and forth, covering his mouth. I didn't stop him in time and almost died. After laughing, he said that I had grown up and should find a woman.

I was stunned by what he said, but when I think about it, what he said is also reasonable. Because, I can't sleep these days, and I miss women more and more, not just Xiangling. Besides, when I woke up the next day, there was always a big piece of white underwear.

At first I thought I was in a hurry to drink white rice porridge during the day and spilled it on it. However, what I ate that day was sweet potato noodles, red, and I didn't drink porridge. Where did I get the white? This can only further prove that what Wu said is correct.

I never worried. I started to worry. I lay on the kang, my eyes numb and I had nothing. How can I get a wife? What worries me is that I can't sleep, I can't eat, and the number of eating and drinking from door to door has also decreased.

The folks who don't know think I've turned over a new leaf, and I know what to do and have plenty of food and clothing. In fact, my heart is bitter. I am not a monkey. He can eat or drink, but I can't I just want a wife.

When I knelt on the ground in a thatched cottage surrounded by my family and sincerely prayed for Bodhisattva, Guanyin and ancestors, when the short Wu family recruited a son-in-law, a "tornado" blew in the village.

This gust of wind made a lot of noise in the whole village. Door-to-door son-in-law, that is, we often say "down the door." In the feudal traditional concept of "there are three unfilial sons, and no heirs are great", this is looked down upon by the whole village and is detrimental to the face of our ancestors.

Therefore, everyone is holding the mentality of watching the fun and watching the jokes, and they are crowded together with Wu Jiawei to see if that shameless creature is also coming to this muddy water.

I'm barefoot and I'm not afraid to wear shoes. As soon as I heard that there was such a good thing, I dressed up and started to be a door-to-door uncle.

I carefully took the patched faded military green coat and khaki trousers stolen from Grandpa Li's house out of the old rotten wooden box and put them on myself. From the bottom of the bowl stained with lard, I touched it with my hand and rubbed it on my hair at will, which was shiny and watery. Radiant, I strutted towards the short Wu family.

"Come, come, get out of the way, get out of the way!" I pretended to push people away with dirty hands and said politely.

"hmm? This is not, who is this not? " An old man with gray hair pointed at me, wondering.

"Who else, Chen Dadan! The boy is dressed like a dog. Look at his hair. It's as oily as a dog licking it. I think he probably wants to be a son-in-law! " A stout aunt, with a mouth like firecrackers, said in a crackling voice.

"Also, only this shameless guy with no ancestors will be the son-in-law of the dwarf buke. Bah! " Lao wang next door, a face of abandon disdain.

My dead mice don't feel cold, they say theirs, and I still walk quietly towards short Wu Jiali.

"Hey, there are so many people! It seems that I am not the only one who is shameless. Damn, this is really a hot cake. Everyone wants to be a son-in-law! " I said to myself happily.

I probably glanced at it, and there were five or six young people standing in the yard of the short Wu family. At this point, he is standing in the middle of the yard, facing them. His daughter Wu Xiuxiu, wearing a big red hijab, quietly hid behind him.

"Since everyone is here, I won't talk nonsense! This time, it was really a last resort to openly recruit a son-in-law in the village. " He shouted at the top of his voice

"Old father-in-law, hurry up, everyone can't wait!" A stout man like a melon, rubbing his hands and laughing lewdly.

"Yes, hurry up, wait to enter the bridal chamber!" Several other people followed.

I tried to restrain myself and try to be a man, which left a good impression on my father-in-law and short Wu.

"Don't worry, everyone, listen to the old man." I stopped pretending.

Shorty Wu gave me a look and continued, "Now that everyone is here, I have made it very clear. My daughter Xiu Xiu got a serious illness a few days ago and suddenly became dumb! " He began to cry as he spoke.

"What, dumb? Isn't this a joke for everyone? I don't want to face a mute all day, I will go crazy! " A tall and thin man shouted like a drake.

Subsequently, several other people also expressed their dissatisfaction, unwilling to face a mute and left one after another. Just me and the short, fat man with the melon.

Don't say dumb, even if it is deaf, blind and lame, Lao Tzu also recognizes it. I am very helpless. I finally got such a good thing and gave my wife away for nothing. Maybe I can inherit his fortune in the future. I am happy to think about it myself.

"Now you two are left. If you have anything to say, just ask? " He asked with tears in his eyes.

"Father-in-law, I just want to eat better, dress better, and don't be too tired!" The stout man, with his arms in his hands, said pulling like a 2580 thousand.

I looked down and stared at him contemptuously. Although I am recognized as a glutton in the village, I am also a good-looking person. Compared with the fat pig in front of me, it's just a heaven and an underground.

I held my head high, straightened my chest, and pretended to be respectful. I said, "Old father-in-law, my little husband is incompetent, and he has caused a lot of trouble to the villagers before. When I come to your house as a son-in-law in the future, I will definitely repent and turn over a new leaf, and take good care of Xiu Xiu and your old man, as long as you don't dislike me. "

"Well, good, good!" He wiped his tears and nodded.

Later, with his fairly satisfactory appearance, he even said a good word and made him happy in his father-in-law's heart, only to get his approval and become the Wu's son-in-law.

Single for twenty years, the wedding night tortured Xiu Xiu to death. Although this kannika nimtragol is mute, it looks delicate and tender, very attractive, like a peach, which makes people unforgettable.

Not long after the marriage, Xiu Xiu became pregnant. Later, I gave birth to a big fat man. I, Lao Tzu and Chen Dadan, finally have offspring, which are worthy of ourselves and Chen's ancestors.

Now, my son Wu Xiaodan is growing up, and my daughter-in-law Xiu Xiu is sensible. It's up to me. Family life is good.

Who said that the life of "inserting the door backwards" is not easy? I, Chen Dandan, didn't lead an interesting life as usual.