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How should a husband handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
How should the husband handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? Is it possible to ease the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law if they often quarrel? The role of husband is very important, so how should husband deal with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? How should a husband handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?
How should the husband handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? 1 If the husband doesn't ask about the war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the family relationship will be full of gunpowder. For a husband, on the one hand, he is a mother who has raised children for thousands of days, and on the other hand, he is a wife who is ready to grow old together. The origin of the mother-in-law war is because of you. In order to deal with the relationship between these two women, we men have the responsibility to use our brains to find ways to make these two women who love you stand on the same front and make ourselves "enemies" in the eyes of their wives and mothers.
First, after all, I am the root of the war, and of course I am responsible for reconciliation.
As a man, you shoulder not only family responsibilities, but also family harmony. Only in this way can home become a warm harbor.
The two major sources of love in the family are all due to common interests, and the spoils really want to give you unique love. This behavior is all because of you, so of course you have the responsibility to let two women live in harmony.
Tell your wife as much as possible that your mother likes her. For example, a mother always praises her daughter-in-law for her ability and ability to talk. She is one in a thousand outside. By the way, buy something to bribe my wife, saying that her mother bought it for her.
At your mother's place, you should coax the old man to be happy as you did in front of your wife. You should learn the spirit of two sides.
Second, because the root of the war lies in you, you should confuse the eyes of two people.
The ability you have to learn is to transfer the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to yourself.
First of all, they all love you. You don't have to be afraid that they will fight you to the end.
Moreover, only in this way, their goals have shifted, and the quiet days in your life have come.
Contradictions between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are mostly trivial matters at home, such as who washes clothes and who cooks. It's really a strength for a man, but if your wife and your mother are at odds, you'd better do these things.
How should the husband handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? 2. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is tense, and men should be more biased towards their wives.
First of all, as a married adult male, you should clearly understand that you are a person who can get married without a mother. You and your wife are a new family. You should establish a position called "we" with your wife, that is, no matter what happens, you will always be on her side. I know many men find it incredible, and even think that my suggestion is a bad idea, so that my wife and I can stand aside against my mother? Isn't this unfilial? In fact, not only will you not offend your mother, on the contrary, you will let your extended family members live in harmony. Let's analyze it together.
When your lover and your mother are in conflict, if you don't take sides, then your relationship is a triangle, which is the most difficult to deal with. If you choose to stand with your wife, then your relationship will become a set of opposing contradictions, the complexity will be greatly reduced, and it will be easier to deal with. At this time, you need to show a gesture in front of your mother: we (you and your wife) are a family, so what's the point? This will separate your mother, and the contradiction will be solved easily. Of course, maybe you think it will make her sad. Don't worry, it won't. At least your mother won't love you for it. I believe that mothers in the world have a broader mind than you think.
Many men fail in this matter mainly because of misunderstanding of filial piety. What is filial piety? Many men think that standing with their mother is filial piety, which is all wet. You should know what your mother's greatest expectation is. All motherly love wants her son to live a happy life and a happy family. You can only pass on your happiness to your mother and make her happy. This is true filial piety, not taking the mother's side to deal with your wife when the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have contradictions. Many men will speak ill of their wives in their mothers' ears in order to appease them. The consequence of this is to make your mother feel that her son has been bullied, so she hates your wife even more, and there will be more and more contradictions between the two sides in the future. On the contrary, when you are happy in front of your mother and often talk about your wife's advantages, your mother will thank your wife from the heart, because your wife takes good care of you, so that your whole family atmosphere can become harmonious. Many men just can't turn this corner, which leads to escalating family conflicts and their own pain.
Tell an old joke, that is, a brain teaser that has puzzled my husband for hundreds of years: My wife asked: Your mother and I fell into the water at the same time, who will you save first? After reading what I said above, do you have an answer in your heart? The standard answer is: save the wife first, what about the mother? Don't worry, your father is on shore, too. He knows what to do. It can be seen from this story that only if you stand firmly in your wife's position will the result of this matter be a win-win situation. I hope that the majority of male compatriots will seriously consider this issue and not be confused.
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is tense. As a husband, you should be clear about your position.
In marriage, couples should always establish an atmosphere of unity. All men should be clear that you are the husband of one woman first, and then the son of another woman. In many families, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is tense. The husband has largely reversed the order of this relationship, making both the wife and the mother very painful, and it is even more painful to be caught in the middle.
I know many men find it hard to accept putting their wives in front of their mothers. I feel that doing so is alienating their mother, and there is an old saying in China: if you marry a daughter-in-law, you don't want your mother. It is even harder for husbands to accept it, because this concept is deeply rooted. However, as the backbone of a family, your choice directly determines the relationship between all members of the family, so the husband should bravely make the right decision: that is, stand with his wife and tell everyone that you are a complete family and you are a whole.
The biggest obstacle for many husbands to accept this kind of thinking is that they are afraid that their mothers will be sad and think it is unfilial. After all, their mother raised herself for more than 20 years. Then I have to ask: Do you want your mother to be happy? You must want to make her happy, so how can you make her happy? I'm not with my mother all day, and I'm not on her side when I quarrel. The correct answer is: if you are happy, she is happy. Because your mother and son are related by blood, your mother and son are interrelated.
When the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have conflicts, the husband chooses to stand firmly on his wife's side. At this time, my mother may feel very uncomfortable, but believe me, my mother will soon adapt to the change of this relationship, and in the following days, there will be fewer and fewer contradictions between you and your mother. Building a clear family boundary is a very important job in the process of running a marriage, which directly determines the quality of your marriage.
There is also a common situation in China families, that is, after the husband and wife have children, the contradiction between the wife and mother-in-law will also increase. Most of the flashpoints of contradictions are about the upbringing and education of children. The two sides often have contradictions in educational concepts and methods. Both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law think it is for the good of their children, so both feel that they are right and it is almost impossible to give in. At this time, the husband's attitude is very important. At this time, the husband needs to use my method to stand on his wife's side, so that you, your wife and your children can become a whole, and clearly show your mother that you are a family of three, and the education of your children is handled by you and your wife. You can handle it. Your mother doesn't interfere.
There are two reasons for this choice. First of all, in the concept of education, the concept of wife is undoubtedly more advanced than that of mother, so it is correct to listen to her in most cases. Secondly, it will be of great benefit to your marriage and family, and you will be more United. Harmonious marriage is very beneficial to children's growth.
A good relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is actually quite simple.
How to improve the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law That's eight words: life is like a play, it all depends on acting. No matter how unhappy you are with your mother-in-law, don't quarrel with her mother-in-law in a positive way, let alone insult her mother-in-law in front of her husband. On the contrary, you will show your respect and filial piety in front of your husband, and you will praise her. For example, when I give money to my mother-in-law, I will definitely give it in front of my husband to let him know my filial piety to her. I am really happy to see my husband's expression. In this way, how can a husband not appreciate that his wife likes his wife? Once the mother-in-law conflicts with her daughter-in-law, her husband will think that her wife is quite good, not that kind of bad person. I will also protect you in my heart.
I think the first thing that mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can get along well is that two people should realize one thing in common: that is, our starting point is good. Also, don't flatter others too much to their face, but in others, it can be said that it is better to know that it is better to hear your mother-in-law praise yourself through one person than to praise yourself face to face. Usually I don't talk much. When chatting with others, I always say that my mother-in-law is very nice. But to tell the truth, she is really good, and she has some speaking skills. When I was pregnant, I went to open a shop, and my mother-in-law said that I would be fine if I closed the shop for a few days. I said, it's easy for me to open a shop after all. It is also the income from eating. It is better than my husband's anyway. My husband works too hard, but now our family has just bought a house, and there is nothing we can do. Let's work together. My mother-in-law is probably overjoyed and thinks you are too good.
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