If his ex-wife comes back after divorce, will a man choose to forgive?

Love is a kind of "encounter", and marriage can be regarded as a period of "being together". If you don’t know how to cherish it when you have it, you will definitely understand what it means to regret it when you lose it.

There are profound truths hidden everywhere in relationships, and once you understand them, you will feel sad. Without painful experience, it is difficult to understand the meaning of the word "love". In the eyes of many people who have experienced it, the love that once seemed innocent and innocent turned into a sad story unknowingly over time.

It is said that friends are easy to make but confidants are hard to find. Just as it is easy to say "I love you", but it is always difficult to truly love each other for a lifetime. Regarding marriage and love, there is always one feeling per person. For those who are heartless, love may be just a game of clicks and stops. For those who are infatuated, it may be their lifelong obsession.

Although some people say they understand the truth of love all day long, although they think they can stay married for a lifetime. But when "love is deep", there are still many people who are willing to make emotional mistakes that shouldn't happen.

All around us, there are many married people who accidentally ruined their marriages of many years in order to pursue love outside of marriage. In the end, love was not obtained, and the originally happy family was lost.

They are like many people who have no choice but to regret it when they look back again. That encounter, that falling in love, turned out not to be the beginning of romantic love, but just the beginning of a sad story.

1. The divorce process of a middle-aged woman reflects an uncontrollable emotional pattern

I remember a divorced middle-aged woman had a heart-to-heart talk with me and frankly said the following: The words from my heart are worth pondering for many people.

Before the age of 45, I only dated one man. He was my husband, and now he is just my ex-husband. After many years of marriage, my body belongs only to my husband, and he is the only person I have ever loved. At that time, I should have been proud. After all, I had protected myself and rejected the crazy pursuits of many men.

But when I think about those years of marriage, I feel quite aggrieved. Everyone can only be young once. I am almost old and have not experienced other feelings of love, nor do I know what it feels like to be with someone else.

This is the truth. I was really curious at the time. When people reach middle age, they take things for granted and don’t have much to do, so they start to get curious about this matter.

I believe that there are many middle-aged women like me who think this way, but they don’t dare to admit it. I dare to admit that if possible, if it does not affect my marriage and family, and if it can be concealed well, I would also like to try other feelings of love. This is human nature, I can’t lie to myself.

That year was the 25th year of marriage. I thought that the marriage was already very stable and ignored the external emotional crisis. On that business trip night, a friend and I had dinner alone. We both drank too much and accidentally fell asleep together. It was really an accident, but since it has become a fact, there is nothing to be embarrassed about.

From that day on, we started dating for 2 years without affecting our family. If I hadn't drank that day, if I hadn't accidentally taken that step, my marriage would still be there.

Of course I know that marriage and family are important, and I also thought about staying away from him, but at that time I just couldn't forget his tenderness. To say that I love him, I don’t mean that I love him too much. I just want a sense of freshness. That is a sense of freshness that my husband cannot give me. To say that I don't love him, I feel very lonely when I can't see him, as if I'm obsessed with him.

He knows my husband and I know his wife. We are usually good friends, but we are lovers when we are alone together. In the irregular dates, everyone gets what they want, and everyone feels that they are getting an advantage. They always think that this relationship is a win-win situation. If you can keep hiding it, you can keep it that way forever.

He is a good husband at home, and I am a good wife at home. We both thought it would not affect our marriage and family. Unexpectedly, I was so wrong. After the incident was discovered, the marriage came to an end.

I don’t have the shame to face my husband again. Although he has forgiven me, I know the pain in his heart. After struggling for three months, I cruelly divorced my husband.

It's not that I don't love him anymore, it's that I can't face him and don't want to hurt him anymore.

2. Many relationship mistakes stem from being too confident in love and marriage

The experience of the woman above is very "classic". The reasons for divorce of many middle-aged couples are similar to hers. . It’s not that we can’t live anymore, it’s because there is additional emotional sustenance in the marriage! It's not that both of them want a divorce, but they have to divorce for the sake of face.

It is said that life is full of tests, and couples in a marriage must face unexpected emotional tests all the time. Anyone who has experienced it knows that most emotional tests are not in marriage, but outside marriage.

Even in some marriages and families with stable relationships, many couples often make emotional mistakes accidentally. Even though she knows she loves her partner very much, she still sneaks into the arms of others. Although I know that I can only belong to the lover in marriage, I still can't help but do some things I shouldn't do.

This kind of marriage phenomenon is very common, especially among middle-aged couples.

The reason why I wrote this woman’s dictation is because I received a voice message from a man. I want to talk about his experience, maybe it will bring some ideas to some couples who encounter similar relationship problems, so that they can experience it for themselves.

Mr. Lin, 48 years old, has been divorced for 2 years and has never married. The reason for divorce is also very "classic". The wife fell in love with a single man, thought she had found true love, and did not want to live with Mr. Lin anymore.

The couple had been arguing for a month, and Mr. Lin agreed to divorce. The 24-year relationship between husband and wife came to an end.

In the two years since his divorce, Mr. Lin has figured out a truth: You cannot be naive when it comes to love. Anyone who is naive will suffer. He was too naive at the time and asked his wife to work in the factory. I thought that my wife would protect herself, I thought that my wife would not be emotional towards others, but I didn’t expect that her heart would be stolen by a single young man the same month she started working.

Mr. Lin once said: My marriage failed because I was too self-righteous and thought she would only love me in this life.

My child got married that year. In the same year, my wife decided to divorce me, and the marriage failed. She said she would be happier living with him, and she no longer had me in her eyes, and begged me to make it happen.

I loved her before the divorce, and I still love her after the divorce. I have been waiting for her for the past two years, hoping that she can change her mind...

3. The once gentle and kind wife cried and said that she fell in love with another man

The story of Mr. Lin Worth thinking for many people.

Mr. Lin said: I still remember that night when she came back from get off work smelling of alcohol. It was already 11 o'clock in the evening. I couldn't sleep and couldn't get through the phone. I was worried about her and kept waiting for her to come back. I was just worried that she would be in danger. I never considered that she would betray me.

I asked her what she was doing and came back so late, and she yelled at me on the spot. She said she was looking for a man and even slept there, and would sleep outside every day from now on.

I thought she might have been drunk, so I just thought she was talking nonsense without taking it seriously. I even find it funny in my heart. You are a 45-year-old woman and you are not beautiful. Who else can you look for? Besides, besides me, which man would have such bad taste in sleeping with you?

But I never expected that in the middle of the night, she would go out and vomit wine, and then keep talking on the phone outside. I heard her having a heated argument with someone on the phone. I pretended to be asleep and didn't care about her, but she cried again after entering the room.

My wife called me "wake up" and cried, saying she was sorry. She said that she had been working in the factory for almost half a year, and in the first month she met a man who loved her. She really liked him and had been liking him for 5 months. We only get together once every three or four days, and we never dare to tell the truth.

The wife confessed to Mr. Lin: My boyfriend wanted to break up with me today, and I drank with him. He asked me to choose whether to marry him or continue to live with you. I want to marry him. We are a couple and our daughter is also married. Please help us. I don’t want to lose him. I have fallen in love with him. He is 5 years younger than you and treats me better than you.

Mr. Lin was confused at the time. His wife had never said the word "love" to him after so many years of marriage. Now, she gave it to another man.

Mr. Lin never imagined that that good, hard-working and sensible woman would do something that was unworthy of him. I always thought my wife was very good, but I didn’t expect that she had been with someone else for 5 months, and I had no idea!

4. In many divorces, one person wants to divorce, but the other person has no choice but to fulfill the divorce.

Mr. Lin said: I was almost angry to death. The child got married and life began to stabilize. What the hell is she doing? I was so angry that I took action directly. It was that attack that completely destroyed our relationship.

She went out before dawn, ignoring me and not letting me follow her. In the afternoon she came back to pack her things and said she was going back to her hometown. I didn't let her go, so she bit my hand open and walked away alone.

I had no choice. After a few days, I resigned from the foreman and returned to my hometown alone. What I didn't expect was that she didn't come back to my house at all, but moved into that man's hometown! That man must have coaxed her away and wanted to take her away from me.

Our hometown is in the same county but not the same town. I quickly found the man’s home. My wife was cooking for him at the time.

In my imagination, that man should have a wealthy family, otherwise his wife would not be able to "love" him. Unexpectedly, his home turned out to be bare-walled. He lived in an old bungalow with cracked walls, making his home look desolate. I can't understand why my wife is so stupid!

The man pretended not to recognize me, kept calling me brother, and even handed me cigarettes. I was embarrassed to make a big deal out of it, so I ignored him. I took my wife and went home with me. She didn't want to go back with me, so she knelt down to me again and begged me to let her go.

I had a fight with that man that day, and I was injured and had stitches. Finally, with the mediation of the neighbors around his house, my wife returned home with me. But a few days later, my wife went to see him again, and the door was closed, refusing to let me in. I couldn't bear it anymore and I really didn't want to be embarrassed. After a month of trouble, I had no choice but to divorce.

I want to watch her regret and see what kind of life they can live. But only three days after our divorce, she went out to work with that man and was never found again...

From that day on, I have been waiting. I may be useless, and grown men also like to cry. I know my daughter has her phone number, but she doesn't want to tell me because she's afraid I won't be able to think about it.

Mr. Lin said: I have always loved my wife, but my wife had a change of heart and fell in love with someone else. For me, love is about torturing yourself and letting others see your own jokes.

5. Regret after the divorce, she wanted to remarry

Mr. Lin finally asked me: I don’t know many words. In the past two years since my divorce, I have been miserable every day and lost more than ten kilograms. . I can't figure out the big reason, but I know the responsibility of marriage. No one has comforted me in the past 2 years. Let me ask you a question. If she comes back, can I still want her?

Mr. Lin added: How should I put it? She really came back last month, and she came to beg me and kept saying she was sorry. He said that the man had a bad temper and always beat her. She didn't want to be with him, so she sneaked back alone. What my daughter means is that when she is older, she should remarry if she can and live a good life in the future.

Can you please answer me? She wants to continue living with me, so she should not dare to make mistakes. She came again in the past two days and we stayed one night, but I still didn't agree to her. She wants to remarry, do you think I can trust her and remarry her?

I answered him: Thank you for your trust. I have seen many cases of your kind of experience. Whether you can have her or not, you already have the answer in your heart. Your daughter is right, if you want to live your life, forgive her. Forgive even if you don't want to. This is a kind of courage. Don't feel weak.

Although I don't recommend that you get together, if she can get rid of that man, if she is not lying to you, you can also continue your relationship. But in life, one always learns from mistakes, and naive thoughts cannot appear again.

No matter what choice you make, you must be responsible for the future. There will always be some pain in relationships. As long as you can forget that pain, you can slowly fade away from each other's distrust.

6. There may be no reason in relationships. Marriage is responsible for the future.

I answered him in a long way, but it was not suitable to send out. What I want to say is that there are many men like Mr. Lin around us, and they are the "gentle" type of divorced men. Even if she is hurt, as long as she is willing to come back, she is still willing to accept it.

Divorce caused by emotional betrayal like this is very common, and regrets in the future are also expected. If the person who made the mistake is willing to look back, and if the injured person can cross the hurdle in his heart, of course we can be together. There are many things in a relationship that you need to make your own decisions, as long as you feel clear about it.

If you can't cross that hurdle, then you would rather stay single for the rest of your life than remarry. You can continue to date, don't remarry easily. Before remarriage, a promise must be made. Only by clarifying responsibilities and forgetting past grievances can the two people continue to be calm.

Marriage is a rough emotional experience for many people, and many divorces are caused by accidental encounters outside marriage. It seems accidental, but it is inevitable for some people.

Good couples are generally like this. On the surface, there may be no love. But in the end, when one person turns around, the other person is still willing to accept it.

Although relationships do not need reason, marriage is responsible for the future. Cherish your family and the person who is with you. Only in this way can we finally be worthy of our marriage and avoid being homeless.