Grind an ear joke

Grandfather punished Sun Sun for disobedience and suffering in the sun. It's so hot that Sun Sun's face is sweaty, pitiful. My father came back from outside and got angry when he saw this. Without saying anything, Deng Deng also stood in the sun to "bask in the sun" and kept shouting: "If you bask in my son, I will bask in your son."

Phoebe sells baby pigs in the collection, and there is a young man standing next to her. She is too bad to baby pigs and ruins the business. Phoebe hates him very much.

After a while, there were fewer people bargaining, and the young man came over and said, "Say a serious price, I want this baby pig."

Phoebe said, "Here's ten dollars and eight cents."

The young man asked, "Is ten dollars enough? Why is it still eight points? "

"You haven't seen a play?" Phoebe said seriously, "Wang Xiaoer spent 1208 cents on michel platini.

Gui Long went to Fancun to sell walnuts. Next to him is a jujube seller. The voice of selling dates was crisp and loud, and he shouted, "Hey, the jujube seller came to sell dates. Good jujube: small jujube stone, seedless jujube! " "After a while, dates were robbed.

Gui Long, a look, very inspired. He also stretched his voice and shouted loudly: "Hey, walnut seller, walnut seller. The big walnut is small, and the small walnut has no kernel! "

Although I cried myself hoarse, I couldn't find a buyer anyway.

One winter, there was no snow, and the wheat seedlings were in great drought. The masses went to the Yellow River with buckets to break the ice and get water to water the wheat seedlings. Only Wang Dagan went down the river with two big baskets. People laughed at him: "How can a big basket carry water?" Dagan said: "Not only can you pick it, but it is much more than a bucket. One bear and two bears. "

Soon, everyone was carrying two buckets of water, and Wang Dagan was carrying two baskets of ice into the wheat field. As soon as the sun shines at noon, the ice cubes turn into water, which is really more than two barrels of water.

A man picked a cart of pumpkins to go to the market. After selling the pumpkin, he saw that the baby pig was quite suitable and bought a baby pig. When he got home, he put the baby pig in the front basket, and the back basket was tilted, so he couldn't pick it. Put the baby pig in the back basket, and the front basket is tilted again, but I still can't pick it. He is afraid that he can't go home today.

At this moment, a child named Xiao Xiang in the village came over. He thought, if you put Xiao Xiang in a basket, you can choose. He said to Xiaoxiang, "Come, sit in my uncle's basket, and I'll take you home!" " "Xiaoxiang said," I don't want to walk back. "He said," Good boy, do a good deed like Lei Feng! Xiaoxiang said, "No, I don't learn from Lei Feng." . I want to eat sugar. "No way, he had to buy twenty cents of fruit candy and put it in Xiao Xiang's pocket, and the little guy sat in the basket for him. When he tried, his two ends were almost the same weight, so he shouldered the burden and said as he walked, "Xiao Xiang, it's a good thing I met you today, otherwise, my uncle really couldn't go home today." "

When their calf died, both fools were secretly happy: "We are short of money these two days. Isn't it a sum of money to peel this skin and sell this meat? "

He borrowed a butcher knife and went to the cattle farm to peel it. After peeling for a while, the knife won't be fast. He looked for a millstone everywhere and finally found it under the table upstairs. He went upstairs to sharpen his knife and went downstairs to peel it. Going upstairs and downstairs to sharpen the knife several times like this bored him to death. He tied the calf with a rope and dragged it upstairs. After some efforts, he finally dragged it upstairs. He wiped the sweat from his head and said with a smile, "Now you don't have to run up and down to sharpen your knife. This method is absolutely unique, and this brain is the spirit. "

It rained lightly, and Lao Zhang found that his roof was leaking, so he invited a teacher and an apprentice to repair it. They repaired it in the rain for three days, and when the house was repaired, the rain stopped. The master picked up the guy and sneaked home with his apprentice.

On the way, the apprentice asked, "Master, we have been working for three days, why didn't you even pay, and sneaked back like a thief?" The master said, "Be my stupid apprentice. You don't care about the status quo. As soon as the rain stopped, people's houses were repaired for nothing. Do you think people will still pay you? " Disciple also began to understand: "Then let's hurry, lest he catch up and ask us for food for these three days."

Every time there is a meeting in town, Zhang San, who sells tofu, buys a ticket for tomorrow. But as soon as he got home, he regretted it: watching a play delayed making tofu. If you don't go, the cost of buying a ticket will be high. After careful consideration, I finally came up with a good idea. He handed the ticket to Li Si across the hall: "Brother Li, please show us a play tomorrow." Li Si said, "Well, we'll help you watch the play, and you have to watch the door for us."

"ok!" Zhang San said, "You show me the play and I'll watch the door for you."

Li Si came to the theater and saw the audience watching the play carefully. He thought, "Zhang San, Zhang San, you are really a traitor!" You're afraid of delaying making tofu to make money, so I'll help you watch a drama. I'm a fool, aren't you? I won't give you a good look! " He went to the back, leaned against the corner, covered his ears, closed his eyes and snored and pretended to sleep. After the play, he went home and found something stolen by thieves. He asked Zhang San angrily, "How did you take me out?" Zhang San said angrily, "To tell you the truth, I guessed that you didn't show us the good play, and we didn't really watch the door for you."

Li Si grinned: "Hum, I knew you didn't really watch the door for us. Of course I didn't watch your watch!" " "

A thief got into Gua Tian and just ate a melon. The owner of the orchard found out, "Hey, how did you steal a melon?" "I'm here to buy melons. What do you mean by stealing? Don't pollute people's innocence. " The thief turned into a smiling face. "Boss, you choose a good one for me."

The host picked a melon, weighed it, cut it and handed it to him. The thief tasted it and couldn't help saying, "Fortunately, you are still a melon farmer, and the melons you picked are not as delicious as those I just stole."