Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - A model essay on graduation message with a smile.
A model essay on graduation message with a smile.
Xiao Pang: I hope you will always remember me in your future life! P.S. Forget the 300 you owe me. I am not a stingy person. )
Banhua: Actually, I have always liked you for four years!
Girlfriend: Actually, I haven't liked you for four years!
Brother who sleeps in my upper bunk: Remember to wash your feet after strenuous exercise!
Honest king: I wish you a lot of wives and concubines in the future and enjoy happiness forever!
Hua: I wish you and (note: my girlfriend) a long life together today. Be kind and love! P.S. The honest king upstairs despises you! I saw your true colors today!
Everybody: I wish you a room full of children in the future! * * * Enjoy your family! Have you thought of your grandson's name? I'm already up.
Zhu Xiao: Use it small, there will be no troubles in my life! Brother, have a good trip. I'm working in Xiaoxiancao sanitary towel factory now. Come and see me sometime!
Learning Committee member: I hope that when we meet again, it will be at the doctoral graduation ceremony of Harvard University in the United States. You and I are very excited, shake hands with each other. You said: Congratulations on your doctorate! I also said: look at other places, all the cans here have been picked up.
Monitor: Brother, take care all the way and be safe. This is my last command to you, although you have never heard my command in the four years under my command.
Liu Hai (President of the Student Union of our school): Four years have passed quickly. You and I both miss these wonderful four years very much. As time goes by, people don't get old. On such a day, I really want to live for another 500 years!
Xiao Qiao: I wish you a double harvest in your love career! Besides giving us a lot of girls in our later life, we should also leave some love for ourselves!
Graduation message with laughter 2
Idiot: ooxx, ooxx and ooxx, don't say anything!
Old tramp: Four years have passed quietly, and the sadness of parting has spread to our hearts. What a warm time we had! How unforgettable it is to go to an Internet cafe, go to a disco, skip classes, make-up exams, smoke, drink and play cards! May you be happier than this in the future!
Boss: I wish you become a big boss with billions of assets in the future, and make the gold content of your diploma higher with your own hands!
Little Sage: I wish you smart life, smart enjoyment and smart life! Ps: I won't see you off tonight. I have to take a make-up exam in advanced mathematics tonight.
Minister: On this sad parting moment, I would like to extend my sincere greetings and highest love to you and Xiaobai behind you on my own behalf. Wish your family happiness and happiness! Over 100.
Chen: I'm going out for a stroll. Sooner or later, separation is not terrible. The terrible thing is that I haven't heard from you since we separated! Remember to call me.
First place: I wish you a high life in the future! You asked me that question in P.S. graduation exam, and I finally figured it out. Now I'll write the answer for you:
# $ @%% (Note: sixteen formulas and some words are omitted here)
Lao Liang: The depth of love is the cutting of responsibility. This is the root cause of my quarrel with you last time.
Xiaoli: I remember you were a cute big boy who didn't talk much. I hope you will be happy in the future!
Huahua: Over the past four years, your lively humor and age have brought endless joy to everyone. I sincerely hope you will be happy in the future!
Cookie: I hope you won't call a girl a cookie casually in the future, she will hate you for life!
Master Liu: Outside the pavilion, beside the ancient road, fork fork, don't laugh. Although I can't remember this ancient poem, I will always remember you! I wish you happiness forever!
Chang Jun: Come and play with us when you are free! We have your best one here! That's it! Hey hey hey.
Head teacher: You are a clever student. People don't think so because they don't know you.
It's funny to laugh my head off.
1, vulgarity is a breakthrough, especially when elegance and nobility do not work.
2. Dwelling in a humble abode, being timid and angry.
Don't always call me an animal. Get to know me better and you will know that I am worse than an animal.
4, eyebrows are cold and ashamed of adulterers, and loose soil is sweeter than skirts.
Recently, I have been under great pressure, and eating Wangwang ice cream is worse than others.
6, cow dung is cow dung, even if you are fragrant, flowers will generally not be inserted in you, because that will insult the aesthetic feeling.
7. Niu B is an ordinary person and Niu Organ is a scholar.
8. Why do we all give darkness to the devil? Because they are brave and not afraid of the dark.
Lying is a man's privilege and being cheated is a woman's patent.
10, I don't like her, I like my script, but my script is that I love her deeply.
1 1. When you chase the prince charming in your heart, the frog waiting for you is actually a prince and will be caught.
12, if something happens, don't let your feelings sow at will, or they will take root and sprout. If you want to pull, you have to toss and turn. I can't pull if I want to.
13, the feelings of two people, if only one person tries to mix honey, then in the end, it will only turn another bee into a fly.
14, drunken friends are fools, and loved ones know fools.
15, the reason why you can't hold sand is because you choose a sieve for flour, which is too thin. I can stand you because I used a net to catch big fish and let all the small fish slip by.
16, the lost happiness is the chrysanthemum on your ass. It is often only when you have diarrhea that you feel that it is blooming brilliantly.
17, ugliness is not your fault, nor is stupidity your fault, but showing ugliness and stupidity incisively and vividly cannot be used to show off your great achievements, so be modest.
18, you are very kind, especially when you are sad.
19. Feelings are like buying stocks and choosing junk stocks. If you lose money, it doesn't matter. The key is to learn to stop loss, but what you are most afraid of is not admitting the failure of your eyes, just holding it, waiting for the rebound, waiting and waiting until the flowers have thanked you several times.
20, with a brilliant facade, reveals the essence of dress B.
2 1, women wear makeup masks and men wear moral masks.
22. Those conceited people will crow among the cranes forever.
23. What is irony? Ironically, even if you are willing to be someone else's toilet paper, people still think your paper is soft, dirty your fingers, and hard, hurting your ass.
24. Don't always say that the mud on the wall can't be turned over, because even if you are concrete and no one turns it over with you, you still have to be on the ground and someone turns it over. No matter how bad the mud is, it will still stick to the wall
Think of your boss as a baby and then think of yourself as a breast. Give yourself a little more pressure and squeeze out a little milk, because the baby doesn't know how to appreciate the breasts that can't produce milk yet.
26. Clothes make the man, and gold depends on Buddha. But the essence is still the essence, just like you, whether it is Li Ning or Adidas, it is impossible or not.
27. One must fall in love at first sight at least once in one's life. It seems that I have made many people live this life.
28. It is said that beauty matches the beast, so I will be a beast for a while.
29, people who want to bubble can't bubble, then at most one plan is ruined; The person who wants to be soaked is soaked in formalin, which is called bleeding.
30. As the saying goes, brothers are like brothers and women are like clothes, which is quite valuable for reference, but reality has added some elements of the times to it. Now, brothers are like artificial limbs, and women are like underwear. People can be one-armed men, but they can't see people naked.
3 1, the film can be a story without a director; The story has no screenwriter, but it's nothing. Therefore, you should at least be a screenwriter in your life, and strive to develop a director if you want to be wonderful.
32. I think you are a professional weaver, specializing in catching penguins.
33. Are you a frog in the well, or did you not even run to the well?
Life always likes to throw me as a tug-of-war between angels and demons. To get back at them, I decided to make a straw rope, break it, and then they all rolled away.
35. Most people won't say I'm handsome, but generally just say I'm domineering.
36. I believe that it is a pity that Raytheon can't touch you when you go out in the rain.
37. There was once a woman who wanted to change me. As a result, she only dismantled my parts and never put them on me again.
38. Romance can never be valued, otherwise I would have been worth millions.
39. Going out for a walk doesn't suit me. My biggest wish is to sit in front of the computer and meditate on Sunday.
40, people do not YY waste teenagers! No, the cat is not feeling well!
4 1, alive, just to leap forward.
Even though I am very young, I am still great when I try to live for myself, but I don't know the size of greatness.
43. It's not that my happiness must be based on your pain, but that you should let your pain make me happy.
A hilarious joke.
1. If I were a tear in your eyes, I would slide down your cheek and disappear between your lips. If you were a tear in my eye, I wouldn't cry, because I am afraid of losing you!
2. Four sweet lips, two pure souls and an immortal love. This is the beautiful element of kissing.
3. The flowers in the wall are red outside the wall, so there is no way to pick flowers. If you want to spend, you have to thank, and a joy is empty.
4. The most beautiful thing in life is the process, the most difficult thing is getting to know each other, and the most desired thing is the result! The hardest thing is waiting! The happiest thing is true love, the most fearful thing is ruthlessness, the most regrettable thing is to miss it, and the most important thing is to be with you.
5. You are the wind, I am the sand, you are the leather shoes, I am the brush, you ignore me and I commit suicide!
6. Love experts sincerely serve you, please enjoy my free professional service! Passionate kissing type, warm hug type, light touch type, or affectionate hand-holding type, sweet talk type. Please make your choice.
7. I love you! If you love me, then take these three words. If you don't love me, please give it back to me!
8. Insist on the absolute leadership of your wife. Wife always comes first, children second, dogs third and I fourth.
9. My family has a sow and a group of piglets. If you are willing to come and live in my house, I will sell the sow and live with you wholeheartedly.
10. Every time I miss you, the picture is mosaic.
1 1. I just like to watch inspirational stories of social girls, from junior high school and high school to being a waiter washing dishes and handing out leaflets when I grow up.
12. The weather is fine today. I stayed in my room for a long time. I'm going to play in the living room.
13. Mathematics is the most romantic. It is more perfect than anything in the world. It never lies, betrays or fails.
14. If you are not nice to your wife, don't blame me for being too nice to your wife. Mr. Wang who lives next door
15. Some people stay in bed because they have money, and they can sleep as late as they want. I stay in bed because I have no money, so I can save a meal.
16. What is loneliness? The phone bill of 50 yuan has not been used up for six months, so the monthly rent has been deducted.
17. You are frozen into a ghost in the north, and I show my thighs in the south.
18. People have two eyes, both of which are parallel, so we should look at people equally; People's ears are two-sided, so don't listen to one side of the story; Although people have only one heart, they have left and right atria, so they should not only think for themselves, but also for others.
19. The curtain of the life stage may be opened at any time. The key is whether you are willing to perform or choose to escape.
20. Let's turn our worries into thinking and planning beforehand!
2 1. Facing the goal, you are full of confidence. How many times can you fight in life? In the face of achievements, all roads lead to Rome.
22. Don't hesitate to face opportunities; Don't hesitate to choose; Don't be afraid in the face of decisive battle!
23. Without saliva and sweat, there would be no tears of success.
24. I only trust two people in this world, one is me and the other is not you.
25. Some people just don't understand. If you don't fuck, he won't know you're his father.
Share funny jokes that make you laugh.
1. Go downstairs to buy things at the grocery store. When checking out, I asked the boss if he had Alipay, but the boss said no, there was Jiaduobao.
2. Give the future mother-in-law a bad review, and the delivery is too slow.
Holding a hot, charging mobile phone, regardless of life and death, is a rare heroic moment in my life.
4. Is the leaf leaving because of the pursuit of the wind or the tree can't stay?
5. Brothers are like brothers and women are like clothes. Anyone who touches my brothers and sisters will strip his clothes!
I have made up my mind that if I have a son, I will be a robber, and if I have a daughter, I will be a princess.
7. I am an actor, and my eyes turn when I see beautiful mm.
I don't know much about Wu Bai, but his brother 250 knows me very well.
9. My father is from Jiangsu and my mother is from Hunan. They say I'm a Jianghu person.
10. I don't know whose wife is in my bed, and neither does my wife!
1 1. The Internet is like a prison. You stole a wallet and learned everything when you went out.
12. Whoever controls history will control the future; Whoever controls the present will control the history.
13. Life is so fucking interesting, because life always fucking plays with me.
14. I have to rely on threats to do everything a good-looking girl can do.
15. I often see you on the bus. You often see me. I fell in love with you at first sight, but you were clutching your wallet.
16. Mathematics is actually very simple, but the other 90 points are difficult.
17. There are many classes like prostitutes. I just join them every day. I don't know their names.
18. When your selfie can't find a good angle, you must realize that you look better than the photo.
19. I picked up a magic lamp, hoping I could find someone before I died. As a result, I won eternal life.
20. I was ruthless and cried with my fingers.
2 1. You said that onions are amazing, and they are the only fruits and vegetables that can make people cry. I don't want to deny you, but last time I was hit by durian, I cried all day.
22. I will play with anyone who dares to disturb my study again in the new semester.
23. Generally, girls who like to tell dirty jokes are very beautiful. Why? Because they must have their own beautiful appearance to cover up their wretched hearts.
24. The happiness of the sky is to wear blue; The happiness of the forest is covered with green; The happiness of sunshine is as dazzling as diamonds; My happiness is because I know you.
25. If you are a fish, then I am a hook and I want to catch you; If you are a hill, then I am a river on the side of the mountain, and I want to walk around you; If you are a steamed stuffed bun, then I am a bowl of mutton soup, and I want to soak you.
A hilarious collection of funny jokes.
1. I'm tired of the vague sweet words of vows of eternal love. I don't need a sincere promise. I just want to grow old with you in this life. When the old man can't go anywhere, you are still my treasure!
2. One year old, there is a waterfall at the corner of his mouth. At the age of two, he wore clothes without trousers. At the age of three, his nose flowed into his mouth. At the age of four, he dreamed of ghosts at night. This man is young and worthless. When he grows up, his IQ is very low. He knew he was talking about you, but he insisted on seeing the end. Admire, admire!
Miss you, miss you to death, find an artist to draw you, stick you in a cup, drink water and kiss you every day, how about a demo? Pour a cup of boiling water and I'll burn you to death.
4. Actively respond to the call of Six Eggs. You can only look at your wife's face, kiss her face before going out and sleep next to her face. Don't call her a pervert when you are old. My wife calls me an asshole, and I'm a softie.
I used to be very confused, because you helped me out of the predicament and let me know how beautiful it is to love someone. Let me pay for this life and accompany you to the old age.
6. If missing is a disease, then I am terminally ill; If missing is a feeling, then I have the depth of the ocean; If love is because of hate, then I already hate it; If you poison blindly, I will spend my life for you.
7. Marriage is a consolidated statement, the lover is an account payable, the children are other accounts payable, life is a continuous operation, quarreling is a bad debt provision, fighting is an operating loss, and tears are a reduction in the owner's equity.
8. It is better to make money, and it is better to earn much more than me. By the way, it's easier without me
9. If God lets me make three wishes, the first is to be with you in this life, the second is to be with you again and again, and the third is to be with you forever.
10. I miss you and feel like: cooking without salt; Apples should not be too sweet; Smoke less; Forgot to bring money when shopping; I will miss you when I have time, and I will miss you when I have no time. If I really can't spare the time, I will do nothing but miss you!
35 words that break your belly with laughter
First, as long as the hoe jumps well, where can you dig down the corner?
Second, Monkey King Thrice Defeats the Skeleton Demon's story tells us that a woman who is too fickle will be beaten to death by a man.
Third, you dress dangerously, but you look safe.
Fourth, the life of eating goods is like a train. To sum up: shopping-eating, shopping-eating, shopping-eating.
I'm not afraid to kick you. I'm just afraid that Nike on my feet will get dirty.
My brother smokes because he hurts his lungs and is not sad.
Seven, my advantages are: I am very handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome.
Eight, you can't satisfy everyone, because not everyone is human!
If you don't want to answer my phone, just say so, and don't always let others move around to help you tell me you're sorry ~
Man is iron, rice is steel, and there is no soup in his bones.
Eleven, women mix well, is a sister-in-law, mix well, is a bitch.
Everyone says I'm an actor, because my eyes roll at the sight of beautiful mm.
Thirteen, looking at beautiful women in the street, the higher is appreciation, the lower is hooliganism.
Fourteen, because of loneliness, I have talked about love several times. Who knows that it is easy to be kicked after repeated battles and defeats!
Fifteen, goose, goose, cut the curve with a knife, pluck the hair and add water, light the fire and cover the pot!
Sixteen, toss a coin: head to the internet, tail to sleep, stand up and do homework.
Seventeen, the so-called simplicity, angels with wings, idiots without wings.
18. The furthest distance in the world is not life and death, but the exam is coming soon. Others are reviewing, but they are previewing. More tragically, people passed the preview, but you failed the review.
Nineteen, when you do it right, no one will remember; When doing something wrong, even breathing is wrong!
If eating more fish can nourish the brain and make people smarter, then I should at least eat a pair of whales.
The first guy who knows that milk can be drunk, what did you do to the cow?
Good friends don't need too many, just two. One is willing to lend you money, he asks you for a debt, and the other is willing to kill him ~
Twenty-three, smoking is an art of life; Looking for a cigarette is an attitude towards life.
I feel so unlucky to know you in such a big world.
Twenty-five, where there is no cow dung in the end of the world, why unrequited love for a piece of shit.
Twenty-six, cucumbers must be filmed, and life must be high.
Twenty-seven, at the beginning of life, nature is good, you pay, I eat.
28. Isn't equality between men and women implemented? Why can't I go to the ladies' room?
Distance does not produce beauty, but a third party.
30. You are like a bitter gourd, dressed so cool and looks so weak.
Thirty-one years old, the older you get, the more troubles you have. G's mind is full of G's troubles.
32. All the people I like are on the hard disk.
Thirty-three, they all say that my sister is beautiful, but in fact they are all made up.
In order to cooperate with the successful completion of family planning work in China this year, I decided not to contact friends of the opposite sex for the time being. Thank you for your cooperation.
Thirty-five, there is a crash called password input error, there is a panic called account login in different places, there is a feeling that you can't see, there is a misunderstanding that people and computers are offline, and there is a loss that you don't have access rights!
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