Parents pretend to monitor their children 24 hours a day: mature parents know how to give their children freedom.

A few days ago, Dolphin Jun brushed a Weibo that praised 87,000 yuan.

It's not the funny songs and dances of network celebrities, but the real experience of a child;

Accidentally found that his parents had installed a monitor in his room, and it turned out that he had been living under surveillance.

As soon as the video was released, it immediately attracted a large number of netizens to watch. Many children with the same experience commented:

I feel that my every move is stared at by evil spirits, standing upside down, afraid of fear.

Being watched all the time is really depressing. ?

Without any privacy, I am depressed.

Perhaps the child's anger at Tik Tok is also a kind of collapse and helplessness, and he wants to make a silent resistance.

Life is surrounded by surveillance without dead ends, but you can't refuse it yourself.

"If you have clairvoyance, what do you want to do with it most?"

If you ask a thousand children, you may get a thousand answers.

And I asked among parents, and more than half of the answers were-monitoring children.

Yesterday, I talked to a friend about my parents peeking at my diary when I was a child.

She disdainfully said that there are no parents peeking at the diary now.

I was just about to say, well, times have improved and parents know how to respect their children's privacy.

Who knows she then said 1:

How easy it is to install the camera directly.

This reminds me of the story of the acrobatic troupe taming elephants. Even if the elephant grows into an elephant, in its mind, the thin rope is still impossible to break free, and they still obey with fear.

For children, the ubiquitous control of parents is this rope.

Children are supervised 24 hours a day and sleep under surveillance cameras. Don't they need privacy?

Not only that, some cameras also have remote voice control function. Once children are found not to study or play, they will roar from the air.

Other parents not only install cameras in their rooms, but also equip their children with smart watches with recording and positioning functions to check their online and mobile phone call records at any time.

In the Internet age, parents' monitoring of you is really pervasive. They seem to have a long telescope that can clearly see every pore in your body.

It's scary to think about it. What's the difference between this and prison?

The only difference may be that the supervisor changed from warden to guardian.

As early as July, the relevant news was on the hot search.

/kloc-A 0/4-year-old boy found out that his father wanted to monitor his room and called the police in a rage.

But even in front of the police, my father still felt that he had done nothing wrong.

In the face of the child's accusation of "invasion of privacy", the father said this:

"Why can't I spy on you? This is for your own good! "

In order to supervise children's learning, it doesn't matter whether they are private or not, because in their eyes, they are all for the good of their children, so it doesn't matter whether their emotions can be accepted or whether they will be hurt psychologically.

The child is very collapsed, repeatedly stressing that he is really uncomfortable, and he can feel the collapse through the screen.

It is better to put up with parents' desire for control than to resist the camera.

Zhihu's last one was "What is the experience of being monitored by parents?" Answer, let people see the feelings and consequences of long-term 360 monitoring by parents.

The following is from @ anonymous user:

360 monitoring without dead angle will only make children suffocate more and more, which will lead to bad parent-child relationship and even ruin their life.

In "Four Famous Helpers", a girl once asked for help.

The girl was admitted to Sichuan University, but her mother stopped her from going to college on the grounds that she was far from home and could not see her every day.

However, her mother forced her to die, and the girl gave up going to college.

But now that the girl is in love, her mother will follow her every date, and even on Valentine's Day, she will be the "third wheel" around her daughter.

In the face of the guests, the host was suspicious, and the mother said:

She is all for the good of her daughter, afraid that her daughter will go astray; My daughter is living well now, which proves that her arrangement is correct.

But everyone saw the tears that the girl couldn't hold back and looked embarrassed.

Who wants to be stared at all the time and listen to the arrangement?

No matter how much you love children, remember to be close.

As children grow up, let go slowly, give them freedom and space, and let them create their own lives.

Even if they take a detour or even get injured, it is their unique wealth.

It is normal for parents to be eager to be close to their children. But once the line is crossed, this goodwill becomes control.

Once education is full of control desire, parents and children will become enemies, one desperately pulling and the other desperately escaping. The end result is that the two sides are drifting away and full of grievances.

Distinguishing between love and control is the ability we must have.

Some time ago, a video of a mother letting a blind girl go to school by herself caused everyone to think deeply.

1 1 year-old girl is elegant, because the optic nerve is underdeveloped, which leads to congenital blindness.

Five years ago, she was sent to Harbin Special Education School to study.

My home is 386 meters away from school. If my mother holds her hand, it may take a few minutes, but my mother chooses to let her knock and feel for herself, even if it takes 15 minutes.

Every day after school, my mother secretly followed me, silently paying attention to the children and convincing them that she went to school alone.

Every day at the corner of the intersection, there are more vehicles, and the elegant mother will walk on the outside of elegance and always protect her.

Sitting gracefully in the classroom reading, my mother will be at the door of the classroom, watching her silently.

Every day after school, elegant mother will mute her mobile phone and silently follow elegance.

When she got home, she would sneak upstairs quickly and then run down to see the children.

Going to school "alone" every day is the most proud thing of elegance.

But she never knew that her mother would follow her silently every day, send her to school silently and protect her silently behind her.

Elegant mother said: "One day, her father and I will leave her, so I have decided to let her go to school alone, hoping that she can be independent and confident."

It is precisely because of my mother's cruel letting go that elegance, although the youngest in the class, has become the only child in the class who can go to school and leave school independently.

What's more admirable is that she won the grand prize in the national reading competition.

There are many ways to love. It is also a kind of love to let children exercise and grow up by themselves.

No matter what the reason, it is harmful for children to occupy their living space, because every time their parents occupy a little, their space will be smaller.

Children who don't have enough living space can't exert their fists and feet.

The mature love of parents is the appropriate exit.

First, give freedom back to children.

Then, let's all be selfish.

In our context, "selfishness" is a recognized derogatory term.

The "greatness" of almost losing oneself is praised, while violating inner obedience is regarded as gratitude.

Paying too much results in everyone feeling tired.

The love of "earning ten dollars and giving children nine dollars" is violating the boundary of parent-child relationship.

If you give all of yourself to the next generation, it means that children have to bear the dreams of two generations.

The lives of parents and children are confused by this almost distorted love.

In "I am willing to give everything for him" and "I should fulfill my parents' expectations", I became miserable.

Affection should not be an obstacle to independent personality.

Always think of others, but before that, it is more important to live your own life.

There is no need for parents to cram their sacrifices into their children's future.

While the child feels guilty, don't forget that it is oneself who ultimately needs to take full responsibility for life.

Set a bottom line for interference and dedication, first talk about self-expectation and then talk about "love".

Put your eyes back on yourself and improve yourself.

Put your eyes back on yourself, read the books you want to read, cultivate your hobbies, or improve your cooking and dress yourself up. ...

You love yourself and do what you should do, and the child will be a good child.

-End-

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