Ineffective education: a mother and her daughter were scolded for shaving their heads together, and many educators were only moved by themselves.

A mother shaved her four-year-old daughter's head, and the child cried in pain. The mother not only recorded the whole video, but also kept "educating" the child and said, "If you have lice on your head, I won't scratch you to death!" While speaking, I saw the girl's long hair shaved off.

The child walked away with a towel over his head and sobbed with his head down.

As soon as the scene changed, it was the girl's mother who pushed her hair away completely with a hair clipper and wrote this little video: Daughter, mom is with you, and now no one laughs at you.

To be honest, it's really not a taste to brush this video!

What is a girl's hair to a girl? It is beauty and dignity. But her mother shaved it in such a ridiculous and backward way. I know that shaving is not only a girl's hair, but also a girl's heart.

Thinking of this, I can't help but make a comment.

"Hurt children in a stupid way. Are you her mother? "

"A bottle of medicine. Why shave your head? "

"You are touching yourself, aren't you afraid that children will hate you?"

.......

I saw that the mother kept picking holes behind the comments of netizens, and even sent a follow-up video, constantly expounding her views of "loving her daughter" and "being good for her daughter", which was eloquent and unparalleled.

However, I want to ask, this mother, have you considered the child's feelings?

On second thought, how many educators have considered children's feelings in the education process? Does he agree? Does he understand? Did he feel your kindness?

This reminds me that when I was young, I also had short hair, at least until I could wear a ponytail myself. Simple hair made me feel inferior in my childhood for many years.

When I was a child, my mother wouldn't let me have long hair. There is a simple reason. She said she was afraid of prickly heat, but I knew that if I had long hair, I needed her to comb my hair and braid it every day, and it was difficult to wash it. Such a complicated thing is really too much trouble for my mother. I remember many times that I managed to stay away from the doll's head until I could stab a small tugboat. She stopped me and went down with scissors to make me cry. I can only silently accept the incredible in my mother's eyes.

I think, why when I grow up, I often endure and accept a lot of unfair treatment, perhaps because my mother is strong and self-righteous. Her self-righteous behavior made me see my smallness and humbleness.

Thinking of this, I can't help but feel wronged for the girl in the video, although she is only four years old. What is even more exasperating is that after the child suffered such a big injustice, her mother shaved her hair instead of comforting and explaining. This will only make children feel more guilty, wronged and stressed. She will never feel that her mother is accompanying me, but her mother is still basking in her "maternal love". I seem to see such a picture: such a thin girl is held tightly by her mother.

I am thinking again, are there still many children living under such heavy "maternal love" and "fatherly love"?

Any education that does not consider the feelings of the educated is invalid, and there are only two kinds of results brought by invalid education: 1. Humility II. Rebellion

So, how to avoid ineffective education?

Educators need to think as follows

1. Is this caused by my dereliction of duty?

Children make mistakes or have bad behavior. Before educators want to educate them, please ask educators to reflect on how this mistake or bad behavior is caused.

Why did the girl in the video shave her head? His mother said it was lice. Lice can be said to be a human parasite that almost does not exist in this era. How can a child have such a bug on his head? That is, if you don't pay attention to hygiene, who will help four or five-year-old children develop hygiene habits? Nature is a mother, especially a girl, but also a mother's dress. It is actually the mother's dereliction of duty that the child has not developed the habit of taking a bath and washing his hair. Instead of dealing with the problem with guilt, the mother solved the problem in a simpler and ruder way. Is wrong in itself.

In the pre-school period, children don't need to learn too much scientific and cultural knowledge, but mainly cultivate good living habits. From this perspective, the mother is dereliction of duty.

Only when educators reflect on whether it is the result of their dereliction of duty will they consider the problem from the perspective of the educated, and finally there will be a more scientific solution.

2. Is there only one way to solve children's mistakes?

All roads lead to Rome. Have you seriously considered all the ways to solve the problem? Did you force your child to choose this method? Or did the child choose it after consulting with the child?

Many adults will think, what do children know? Know what? Listen.

Well, your compulsion today is given to your child, and you have to accept his incompetence and cowardice when he grows up. Dare to ask, can you accept it? When you need him to carry everything, you suddenly find that he can't carry it, because you have replaced it too much by violence.

Like this girl, she was forced to get a haircut. Before her hair grows, she may not have the courage to face this "ugly" self. What kind of eyes will she have? After all, she didn't shave because she had to. Her hair may have been left behind.

Just like many netizens feel wronged for girls, why shave it off when there are very effective and cheap potions to use? I think her mother must be as sweaty as my mother. It's hard to wash your daughter's hair. When her back ached and her legs ached, she pushed down the lamp in a rage.

This reminds me of many seemingly simple and effective disciplinary measures, which are actually stupid and ridiculous in the teaching process. For example, tutoring, tutoring this matter as early as my previous article "How the class teacher gains the trust of students", I won't go into details. For example, copying for a hundred times, answering questions about right and wrong in classroom teaching, etc. In my opinion, it is a simple and rude means of education.

How to find a more scientific and appropriate solution to the problem? We might as well give the child multiple choices and let him choose for himself, but educators must explain the cause and effect of each choice clearly, and understand that the child is an independent individual and he (she) will never be anyone's accessory.

Respect is mutual.

3. Do as you say, can children understand your requirements?

If you want your children to accept your criticism and education willingly, you must first eliminate the criticism that can make them feel ashamed, and then try to avoid the criticism that makes them feel guilty. The best way is to criticize from the child's advantages.

How to criticize is a very important educational problem. If the child does something wrong, it's only because he hasn't given full play to his advantages and learned the correct method for the time being. This is a good opportunity for parents to help their children grow up, not an excuse for parents to get angry and shout.

To educate children, respect is the premise, and love is the feeling.

To avoid compulsory and ineffective education, please remember: criticize your child endlessly, he will not stop loving you, but he will stop loving himself!