Game joke

Roll call in the new semester, teacher: Hua Xiaoming.

Bottom: Yes!

Teacher: Hua Xiaoming!

Bottom: Yes!

The teacher growled, Oh, my God! Who is this? Why didn't you answer? ! !

At this time, a classmate stood up and said with grievances: Teacher, that word is pronounced ... (Sun Moon Guanghua)

Commenting on the variation of "although the bow is called", the teacher estimated that there were too many filter words.

2. The first time I played CS, I hit 16 and risked my life to pick up a gun in 16 mode, only to find that there was no sight, so I threw it away in the Great Depression. Later I learned that it was called-being killed! (Terracotta Warriors)

There are only/kloc-0 jokes on the list this year. Did all the students go to SNS?

Four people in the dormitory got hepatitis B at the same time and went to the school hospital for examination. The doctor said: "There are only three ways of transmission of hepatitis B: blood, mother and baby, and sex!" (Shui Mu Community)

Commenting on jokes is always the most popular. There are n possibilities behind this joke.

4. A buddy in the dormitory likes to hug the keyboard and sleep at night. When the school leaders found out, they fired him the next day. Why? (wise and realistic)

Comments are still a new variant of old jokes.

In the activity of "going to the countryside", the village head took my classmate's arm and asked him to help translate the slogan on the village head wall into English. The classmate couldn't stand the torture, so he wrote with a stroke of his hand: tree new wind = = tree new bee! (Shui Mu Community)

Comment on violence! My personal favorite series, 2008, fully shows the bull nature of college students.

6. I have the habit of touching BF penis when I sleep (hee hee). I went to my sister's house with BF yesterday, but I didn't leave at night, so I slept with my sister.

At night, my hand was dishonest, so I reached out to the familiar "place" and pulled it. There was nothing, and then a tingle woke up ~

I thought: it's over. How embarrassing in front of my sister!

Just when I was going crazy, my sleepy sister turned over and muttered, "Brother-in-law, stop that now, I'm still at our house ..." (Shui Mu Community)

This is also a joke that has been circulating on the Internet for a long time. But adding the last sentence belongs to the creative characteristics of folk literature. The baby shakes beautifully, so I recommend it to Master Degang Guo.

7. After the winter vacation, I came back by train for more than 30 hours, sleepy! In the evening, MM said, "Let's see if you are sleepy or my pajamas are sleepy!" "(Sun Moon Guanghua)

Comment on homophonic pun, this can win a language award and recommend it to Mr. Huang Jiwei to be selected as Zhou Yu.

8. During the school spring outing, our class was assigned to the lower reaches of the river to make a fire and cook. As soon as a greedy woman went to the river to wash vegetables, she found melon seeds floating on the river, so she picked them up and ate dozens. Suddenly, she found a lump of shit floating down from the upstream-covered with melon seeds! ! ! (Shui Mu Community)

If there are no disgusting and abnormal jokes in comments, there will be no jokes. It can be compared with a series of previous oral phlegm jokes.

9. There is a girl in the class who is abnormal. The nickname of QQ is "Refuse". Once, I asked her curiously, "Why do you call it that?"

She turned around and said with a shy expression, "Don't you think it's more subtle to add radicals?" *^_^*"

Comment on old jokes or read them on other people's blogs.

10. A man often goes to the school playground to practice running at night. One day, he found a girl to do the same, and he found a rule. The girl ran once a day in the first week, twice a day in the second week, and three times a day in the third week. ...

One night in the third week, he finally got up the courage to strike up a conversation with the girl and said, "classmate, I have been observing you for a long time." You add laps every week, and next week is the fourth week. Is it time to run four laps every day? "

The girl wrote him a note and ran away. I saw the note saying-I won't run next week, you little fool ~ (Hide, Terracotta Warriors)

Comment on the warmest one in this series, the exquisite design and the youth in the short and pithy story.

1 1、

Night talk in the bedroom, a buddy in the upper bunk: "Hey, which woman do you think is the most painful in ancient and modern times?"

Hearing this, the two brothers became interested and asked who it was.

The buddy in the upper bunk: "What a fool! Wu Zetian Bai-because a generation of empress Wu Zetian! ~ "(hide and listen to the sound of the waves)

I can't read the comments. Is it related to Japanese?

12. The teacher asked: Do you know who won the most gold medals in history?

A classmate at the bottom said coldly: Yue Fei, 12 yuan ...

Commenting on this joke on Baidu Post Bar, someone actually replied that Larissa Latinina, a female gymnast from the former Soviet Union, won nine gold medals.

13. On a cold winter night, a MM bought an ice cream and went back to the dormitory to eat it. As a result, she caught a bad cold the next day. After a few days, she was relieved.

Another cold winter night, MM bought an ice cream to eat in GG dormitory. As a result, she and he caught a cold the next day. A few days later, she and he both recovered from the cold.

It was still a cold winter night, and MM bought an ice cream to eat in GG dormitory. As a result, neither she nor they caught a cold the next day ...

Comment on pirated jokes, the original version is "I can't stand it".

In an accident, the ship ran aground on an island, leaving a woman and four men behind.

There was no boat to save them for a long time.

Later, the woman couldn't stand it anymore and committed suicide.

Later, a man couldn't stand it, so he buried the woman.

Later, these men couldn't stand it, so they dug up this woman.

Later, God couldn't take it anymore and saved the woman.

14. I had dinner and chatted with a female classmate in the canteen yesterday. After eating a bowl of rice, I asked for another bowl.

At this time, she accosted: "I can eat BF as well as you, but I am not as fat as you, and my appetite is not proportional to my weight!" " "

"Oh, that appetite is proportional to what? Sexual ability? "

She thought about it carefully, nodded and said, "Well, maybe ~"

"Ha ha, then try starving him twice another day."

She thought carefully for a while, and then said, "Why bother yourself ..." (Terracotta Warriors)

The content in front of the comment is quite boring, but fortunately there is a last sentence, which can be called "meaningful"

15. The school organized a chess class, and the two MMs played very seriously. Then the coach came over and looked at it and said, "You are all wrong. If the veteran is eaten, he loses. He can't go any further. You see you two are still walking ... "(Shui Mu Community)

Comment on cold jokes, lack of a cushion in the middle, incomplete structure.

16. Looking for a young lady at night, "How old is the girl?"

"Seventeen. (Please indicate Tian * Ya Community Happy Paradise for reprinting) "

"It's too small ~"

"How big!"

"hmm? How to say it? "

"You don't listen to TV, and now you often say' 17th National Congress'!" (Memoirs of a Geisha)

Comments are second only to "building a new style".

17. Landlord: When I was in college, I skipped classes, failed, dumped people, got dumped, fought, made mistakes, dropped things ... Hey, I tried my best.

Sofa: Have you ever died? (Tianya Nestle University Campus)

The review is cold, but it still can't compare with the second-hand Li Xia of 200, the car arranged in the shape of "S" and "B".

18. In the third year of high school, I once fought for the landlord in the dormitory, and was suddenly discovered by the teaching director, so I was taken back to the office for strict interrogation!

"Give me a reason, I can consider not remembering you!" (seeking truth from facts)

"Director, it's our fault. Instead of focusing on learning, we want to speculate on the fortune of the college entrance examination this year through the witchcraft of poker ... "

Comment on the funniest jokes.

19. Girlfriend asks: Why do women have menstruation?

A: Because men want to rest! (five-colored soil)

The comment on the quiz joke is simply refreshing, but it's a pity that Mars is so little.

20. My classmate is studying in Shanghai Jiaotong University. On weekends, he went to the Foreign Languages Institute to help his classmates consult about applying for graduate students in our school.

Walking on campus, I met a girl and asked, "classmate, are you from XX Department?" I have a classmate who wants to take an examination of your department's research ... "

Before she finished, the girl interrupted her impatiently: "Sorry, I already have a boyfriend!" " "Then go away!

My classmate looked at the girl's distant back and muttered, "Strange, what's there to show off?" I also have a boyfriend ~ "(Sun Moon Guanghua)

Comment on the strongest one in this series, which is quite meaningful and can be made into a movie directly. The exquisiteness of the design and the crispness of the final packaging are very appreciated. Recommended to director Wong Kar-wai.