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What are the advantages of a ten-year-old child sleeping with his parents?

How old should children sleep in separate beds from their parents? I believe this problem puzzles many parents. Some people say that getting up early can cultivate children's independence. Some people say that sleeping with parents can give children full sense of security. Then, whether to separate beds, when to separate beds and how to separate beds is the best?

situation

1, Wuhan 1 1 year-old boy refused to be separated from his parents and went on a hunger strike. Even if he is beaten by his father, he will never give in.

Since his wife began to get pregnant, Mr. Liu, who is only 37 years old, has started a life of "Cowherd and Weaver Girl" under one roof. The score is 13, and Mr. Liu admits that he almost forgot the taste of husband and wife life.

Thirteen-year-old Mingming often dirties her sister's underwear, and there are bad videos in her mobile phone. Mingming's mother said that her son 10 was only sleeping with her and her husband in separate beds.

affect

Through the above cases, we can easily find that if children sleep with their parents after they grow up, it may have negative effects:

First, it affects the relationship between husband and wife. We often say that the relationship between husband and wife should be more important than the relationship between parents and children. Only when husband and wife live in harmony can they create a warm and harmonious environment for their children to grow up.

Second, it is easy to produce psychological stimulation to children. Children who sleep in the same bed with their parents for a long time will inevitably come into contact with their parents' bodies. For a 2-year-old child, this kind of touching may produce a safe and warm psychological feeling. But a teenager may have a natural physiological reaction, and his parents' married life will lead to precocious puberty.

Third, children are easily temperamental, have poor independence and rely heavily on their parents, which is not good for their growth.

At what age is it best to separate beds?

1-3-year-old children have experienced weaning and defecation training. , and can be distinguished from the outside world, resulting in a sense of independence and control, suitable for bed and room separation.

Children aged 3-6 will be more sensitive to parental relationship and gender issues. From the perspective of sexual psychology, it is best for children to sleep in separate beds after the age of 3, at least they can't directly see the gender of their parents. It's not that there will be problems if we don't separate, but the possibility of problems will be greater. At this time, the child needs to realize that there is a close relationship between his parents, which he can't interfere with. Accepting this is conducive to the healthy development of children.

After the age of 6, children gradually enter the incubation period, paying more attention to the outside world than to themselves, and it is easier to separate beds (rooms) at this stage. In adolescence, children return to their own concerns and have sexual impulses. If they don't "score" before puberty, it may suggest that there are some problems in family relations and interaction patterns.

How can we "separate beds" with children smoothly? 1 layout environment

Give full play to children's initiative and imagination, decorate a small room or cot together, and satisfy children's wishes as much as possible, and children will feel that they have grown up. First of all, psychologically meet children's independent needs, and at the same time create an environment for sleeping alone.

keep a good mood

Tell children jokes or stories to relax before going to bed. You can also listen to soft and soothing music, but don't tell ghost stories or listen to fast-paced music.

3 find a substitute

If necessary, you can find him a substitute. For example, sleeping with your mother's pillow or your favorite doll. After a long time, children are used to sleeping alone, and parents can take away the substitutes, but they must not be too hasty.

4 open the door

When the child begins to sleep alone, open his room door and connect the two small spaces. In this way, children will feel that they are still sleeping in the same room with their parents, not in the same bed.

Special reminder 1 bed separation should be gradual.

In the adjustment stage, we should pay attention to methods, step by step, and gradually change children's behavior in a way that children can accept. First of all, keep a proper distance from your child when sleeping; Then, prepare a small bed for the child at the mother's bedside; The third step is to put the child's bed away, but the mother can still see it; The fourth step is to put the baby's crib farther away or in a separate room.

2 children are not soft-hearted.

Children who have just slept in separate beds with their parents are more likely to repeat. For example, when a child is settled, he runs to his parents' bed as soon as he turns around, or wakes up in the middle of the night and sneaks into his parents' bed. At this point, parents must not be soft-hearted, otherwise the meeting will be wasted. Wise parents should patiently persuade their children to go back to the crib and say more words of encouragement. If it really doesn't work, they can sleep with their children before leaving.

There is no need to get together to commemorate this period.

Some parents will choose to allocate rooms at the landmark time when their children enter kindergarten or school, which is not good. Admission to the park itself is a major change, and housing allocation will put more pressure on children. If you want to divide it, it should be six months to one year in the park or school, because the child has been relatively stable, and you can also take advantage of the opportunity of changing rooms and moving to let him participate in the design and layout. How old should children sleep in separate beds from their parents? I believe this problem puzzles many parents. Some people say that getting up early can cultivate children's independence. Some people say that sleeping with parents can give children full sense of security. Then, whether to separate beds, when to separate beds and how to separate beds is the best?