Three people’s funny cross talk lines

"Snatching the Mandarin Jacket"

(A——Teasing B——Putting C——Crack in the mud)

B: This time you two can help me. a paragraph.

A: Yes! The three of us talk about it.

C: No! This time I will sing a verse.

A and B: (with C) What are you singing? It’s just a cliché, why sing it?

C: This time I will sing something new.

A: It’s done! Don't sing new tunes, just make your voice happy. You know what other people's ears can handle! What are you planning to do to make everyone run away?

C: Just singing with me will make people angry? good! I won't sing anymore! I'm leaving! Let you do it!

A: It doesn’t matter if you leave, we both said!

C: Stop talking, you have to follow me!

A: I won’t leave!

C: Aren’t you leaving? good! Take off your mantle for me. (Mandarin jacket with armor removed)

A: Hey...what's going on with you?

B: Hey... you two! Two! Speak slowly if you have anything to say, what's going on? (Separate the two)

C: I want a mandarin jacket!

B: Why do you want his mantle?

C: What? This mantle is mine.

B: (Ask A) Is this mantle his?

A: Yes!

B: Then give it to others.

A: What are you doing! accomplice!

B: What is an accomplice? Why don’t you wear other people’s clothes and give them to others?

A: I can’t give it to him.

B: Why?

A: I’m afraid he’ll sell it!

B: Thi! Don’t worry if he throws it away!

A: You said that’s not possible! I gave it to him, what should I wear?

B: What is this word? I ask you if this mandarin jacket belongs to him. If it belongs to him, give it to him!

A: Ah! good! It's his, I didn't borrow it from him.

B: Who did you borrow it from?

A: Borrowed it from his mother?

B: That’s his thing too!

A: Even though it belongs to him, we don’t wear it for nothing!

C: Oh! Have you ever received interest?

A: Even if you don’t get interest, it’s better than getting interest. (To B) One day, I had something to do when I went out and wanted to borrow his mantle to wear. I went to his place and said, "Is the eldest brother at home?" His mother came out: "Oh! Second brother! Your eldest brother is not at home, what's the matter?" I said, "Auntie, I want to Let me borrow my brother's mandarin jacket to wear." "Oh! I'll get it for you." He took out the mandarin jacket and said to me, "Second brother, you have to look after your brother. He's always talking. The clouds are shrouded in mist, and he likes to talk big. He gets upset when he comes out and looks for us when he comes home. If you are around, don't think about it. Explain to others, think of an idea and say it satisfactorily, "Why is this mantle in vain?" This is better than giving him interest!

B: Oh! That's what happened. (Telling to C) It’s not for nothing that I’m wearing your mandarin jacket. I’m also doing you a favor!

C: Help? I just rapped a verse and he said I was going to make people angry.

B: Just a joke, why do you take it so seriously? Do it this way! If you want to sing, just sing.

C: What are you singing? He made me faint, tell me!

B: Hey! Just say it, don't let the clouds cover you!

C: What is this word? How can I, with my knowledge, be so cloudy and foggy? He just said that when I ask people to ask questions, it is not asking questions, because I am too knowledgeable. When I say something, those people don't understand and deliberately want to quarrel with me. When I see that those people don't understand, I angrily ignore them, as if I'm asking them to stop asking, but that's not the case. Besides, with my knowledge, can I ask others to ask questions? We don't know what you are talking about.

Take yesterday for example. I said it would be windy, but it started blowing in the middle of the night.

B: It’s a bit windy.

C: A little windy? The wind was so strong that it blew all night. Why! I have a well in my house, did you know?

B: Isn’t it the one by the south wall?

C: Yes! You know how strong the wind was. In one night, the well was blown outside the wall.

B: What?

C: I scraped the outside of the well! I was sleeping at night, but the strong wind woke me up. I heard the light crackle, and water splashed all over the window. At dawn, I took a look and found that the well in the courtyard was gone. When I opened the door, I saw that the well was outside the wall!

B: Never heard of it.

C: Can I tell lies? If you don’t believe it, ask him. (Fingernails)

B: (Ask A) Let me ask you something. You said the wind is blowing too hard. Can the well be blown outside the wall?

A: Is that true? Will the well scrape outside the wall?

C: (The mandarin jacket with armor removed) Take off your mandarin jacket!

A: Hey! Don’t you want it?

C: No? The well in my house has blown outside the wall. Why do you say you don't know where it is? (I want to take off my mantle and jacket)

A: Oh (said to B) Is that a well in his house?

B: Yes?

A: Yes, it was scraped out.

B: Did it get scraped out? Let me ask you, how did you scrape it out?

A: Listen, isn’t it the well in his house? Well, do you understand? There is water in it!

B: Nonsense! How could there be no water in the well? How did you scrape it out?

A: How did you scrape it out? Listen! He's not...he's...ah! That well of his! However, the water was shallow, I couldn’t hold it down anymore, and it was blown out!

B: That’s outrageous! Even if it's a dry well, it can't be scraped out?

A: You said you couldn’t scrape it out, but it was scraped out right before your eyes!

B: How did you scrape it out?

A: Listen! Didn't you ask him why the well in his house scraped the outside of the wall? Because the wall in his house is too short!

B: No matter how short you are, you can’t get out?

A: The wall in his house is not a brick wall.

B: Can’t the earthen wall be scraped out?

A: It’s a fence. Do you understand the fence?

B: Why don’t I understand the fence?

A: Understand? ah! Once you understand, that’s it!

B: That’s all. Let me ask you how did this well scrape outside the wall?

A: Still don’t understand?

B: What did you say?

A: Aren’t you asking about this well? oh! That's what happened, because the fence at his house was too old and was exposed to wind and sun. The bottom was in bad condition, and it was only two feet away from the well. That day, there suddenly came a strong wind, and the bottom of the fence folded, causing the wall to bulge in. He woke up early and looked at it, with sleepy eyes: "Hey! How did it blow my well outside the wall?" That's it. It was scraped out.

B: Oh! What's going on?

A: Alas! Do you understand? (Clicks hand to call C) Come here! How are you talking?

C: Don’t I like to keep things close when I talk?

A: Are you taking the shortcut? I've come a long way! You can see the sweat on my head.

C: (referring to B) This person is also stubborn.

A: You didn’t say that! How about this mantle?

C: You will wear it for another half month.

B: (talking to himself) Hoo! This mandarin jacket is really good. I will make two more mandarin jackets tomorrow.

A: (To C) Please be careful when you speak.

C: I know! (To B) Isn’t this lying? When the wall comes in, the well goes out.

B: No one talks like you.

C: It cost dozens of dollars to repair this wall! Just as this incident was over, another incident followed!

B: What’s going on?

C: Last month I bought a chrysanthemum green mule. You may have heard about it? More than four hundred yuan! Don't you think this is bad luck? I fell into a tea bowl and was scalded to death!

B: It’s the cloud cover! So a big mule will fall into a tea bowl and be scalded to death? How big is the mule and how big is the teacup?

C: Big tea bowl!

B: A big tea bowl and a tea bowl as big as a house? No such thing.

C: Can I tell lies? Someone knows!

B: Who is it?

C: Him! (Fingernails)

B: (asking A) Hey! Let me ask you about something. A mule with green chrysanthemums fell into a tea bowl and was scalded to death. Do you think this happened?

A: Are you awake yet? The mule will fall into the tea bowl...

C: (The mandarin jacket with armor removed) Take off the mandarin jacket!

A: Hey! ...What's going on? Didn’t you say you’d wear it for another half month?

C: It doesn’t matter if it’s half a month or half a year. My mule fell into the tea bowl and was scalded to death. Why are you pretending not to know?

A: Oh! His mule fell into the tea bowl and was scalded to death, not bad! There is such a thing.

B: This mantle is so powerful! There is such a thing! good! Let me just ask you, how could this mule fall into the tea bowl and be scalded to death?

A: I know this, I saw it!

B: How did you get burned to death?

A: That’s what happened. Didn’t you ask him how the mule fell into the tea bowl and was scalded to death? Tell you! Because his mule was annoying, he didn't pay attention, so he fell into the tea bowl and was scalded to death!

B: That’s outrageous! How big is that tea bowl? How big is that mule? Can it burn you to death?

A: Ouch! You're so confused. It's not a clean scalding, it's a flood and a scalding. It's so deadly.

B: It’s even more outrageous! That tea bowl can't even be lowered by a hoof?

A: Isn’t this clever?

B: Never heard of it! The more you say it, the more outrageous it becomes!

A: If you think this is outrageous, there is nothing you can do about it! In short, this is the fate of this mule!

B: What does fate mean? His mule fell into the teacup and was scalded to death. Didn't you see it with your own eyes? I asked you how could a mule be scalded to death in a tea bowl?

A: Ouch! What a mule! You heard wrong. He was talking about snails. If they fall into a tea bowl, why don’t they drown?

B: (Ask C) Oh! Are you talking about snails?

C: No! It's the mule you're riding on!

A: The mule he was riding fell into a tea bowl and was burned to death?

C: Ah!

A: (To himself) That mule you are riding on? oh! I remembered, what is Chawan? There is probably a place called Chawan over there in Tangshan.

C: No! It's the teacup from which to drink water.

A: Hoo! Really terrible! Did the drinking teacup burn the mule to death?

B: How did you get burned to death?

A: That’s what happened to him, oh, I remembered it! That’s right! That’s right!

B: What’s right? How did you get burned to death?

A: Do you know there is Mr. Feng?

C: Which Mr. Feng?

A: The Feng family in Caoduo Hutong.

C: I asked you how you scalded the mule to death. Why did you tell me what Mr. Feng was doing?

A: Don’t be busy! His mule is related to Fourth Master Feng. That day, Fourth Master Feng celebrated his birthday, (pointing to C), he went and rode his newly bought mule. Fourth Master Feng said: "Oh! You are here, have you paid for the carriage?" He said: "I came on a mule." Fourth Master Feng said: "Oh! You are here, have you paid for the carriage?" He said: "The pace is quite fast." Fourth Master Feng said: "Let's see!" He came out and said: "Ah! This mule is good!" Fourth Master Feng is so good at everything, he is also quite good in the outfield: " Okay, Fourth Master! You know why I’m here? I’m just giving you a mule.” Fourth Master Feng said, “That’s not okay! A gentleman doesn’t take away a person’s beauty. I don’t want it.”

He swore at that time, and Fourth Master Feng said: "Okay!" ...Then let’s do it like this. You can take whatever you want from the things in my study. If you don’t want to take it, I won’t take it. He was also very straightforward: "Okay!" I'll take one. "I went to the study room and saw a gourd on the table. It was really the eldest son of "Shahe Liu". It had a gold gall bladder, and the big gourd inside was green. "I want this from you!" "Fourth Master said: "You can bring it up. "He picked it up. After eating, he went home. He was thirsty while walking on the road. He saw a teahouse. He made a pot of tea inside and poured a bowl of it. There were everyone in the teahouse, including some. There were also people who raised birds and grasshoppers. One person held a grasshopper and said, "Second brother, look at my grasshopper. I bought a new one for two yuan!" Take a look. He looked on and got angry! He thought to himself, "What are you doing?" Look at this. "Take out the gourd, open the lid, and bring out the guts inside. The grasshopper has been bored inside for a long time. When it sees the light, he jumps out and is jumping into the tea bowl. The grasshopper has just been poured. Hot tea, wouldn't it be scalded to death?

B: He said it was a scalding mule!

A: Oh! It's so confusing. He traded the mule for the grasshopper. Isn't it the same as burning the grasshopper to death?

C: Oh! That's what happened, do you understand?

A: (Ask C) What did you say?

C: Okay!

A: This jacket. How are you doing?

C: Wear it for another month!

A: Please be careful when speaking, don’t be blind.

C: Okay. ... (Said to A) You understand, I have never told lies! This mule cost more than 400 yuan, and it was burned to death when I bought it! Don't you think this is bad luck for me? Don't care about this, let's take the money as money!

B: It's fate!

C: You didn't walk with me, you don't know, I The treat last few days cost more than 100.

B: Who are you inviting?

C: Mr. Feng, Mr. Wang, Mr. Wu, and Mr. Zhang Liu.

B: I don’t know any of these people.

C: Of course you don’t, you can’t get along with these people. We often eat and drink together. We had this meal a few days ago. It cost more than 100 yuan.

B: Where to eat?

C: Outside the front door, " All in one place."

B: Is it the small restaurant on the east side of the road with fresh fish?

C: Ah!

B: Eat a hundred How much?

C: It’s okay to spend 180. I was so angry that day.

B: Why?

C: Ouch! Forget it! That day we were eating upstairs, right next to the window. We sat down and saw that the upstairs window was closed. I asked the waiter to open the window, but the waiter refused and said, "I'm afraid flies will get in!" "After that, he went out to get the dishes. Out of anger, I opened the window, and everyone sat down to think about the dishes. Just as I was thinking about it, I heard from downstairs, bang, bang, bang, bang! bang, bang, bang! along the window. A roast duck flew in. It landed on the table, and I quickly held it down. Okay, no head! This is a flying phoenix, eat it! "As soon as I ate it, it was quite warm.

B: Hey... you can eat it later. Roast duck can fly. This is the first time I have heard of it. Is this true?

C: Why is that outrageous? If you don’t believe it, just ask him.

B: Does he know?

C: Of course

B: (asking A) Hey! Let me ask you, a few people were eating upstairs, and a roast duck flew in through the window. What do you think happened?

A: What's wrong with you? A live duck can't fly?

C: Take off your jacket!

A: Hey...what's going on! Didn't you say that you can wear it for another month?

C: It doesn't matter if you wear it for another year.

That day, we were having dinner with Mr. Feng, and a roast duck flew up through the window. Did you forget?

A: Oh! You said we flew up to a roast duck for dinner that day? good! There is such a thing.

B: It’s happening again! Then let me ask you, how did this roast duck fly up?

A: That’s what happened. That day we were... ah... (Ask C) Where did we eat?

C: Qianmen Street, “all in one place”!

A: Alas! That’s right! Ah...you know what? "Duyichi" is on Qianmen Street. Just around the corner is the Fresh Fish Port. Isn't there a cheap shop selling roast duck right next to it? Because the roast duck he sells flew out of his place.

B: Never heard of it! Are roast ducks flying everywhere? Wherever they sell sesame cakes, they fly everywhere?

A: Then you are wrong. Shaobing has no wings, but ducks have wings!

B: Nonsense! Roasted duck also has wings? Besides, this duck has no head. Can a duck without a head fly?

A: You said it couldn’t fly, but now it’s flying!

B: This is even more outrageous!

A: It sounds right to you as soon as I hear it. This is a coincidence.

B: Qiaojin? I asked you how you flew up there?

A: Listen! Roast duck, this... have you seen roast duck?

B: Nonsense! Who has never seen roast duck?

A: Have you seen it during baking?

B: I don’t know! I asked you how you flew up?

A: Let me tell you, the roasting duck is like this furnace, just like a small house, with iron bars on top and fire at the bottom. This duck has a hook hanging around its neck, and the bottom is burned. , roast this duck until the oil drips out. This duck is roasted like this, and it can’t hold its breath. This duck: "Ouch! Ouch!... This is too hot! I really can’t stand it!" Duck Think about it this way: I’m going to fly away! Wouldn’t this just fly? Do you understand this?

B: Me? Even more confused! The slaughtered duck had its hair shaved off and was already dead. Let me put it this way, the duck was half-roasted and it became alive again? oops! This mandarin jacket should be worn by people who care about it! (Dusts A’s mantle)

A: Why are you so stubborn? Isn’t roast duck still a duck?

B: It’s a duck. Let me ask you, regardless of life or death, it has no wings, can it fly?

A: Oh! That’s what happened! That day we sat upstairs and before we even asked for food, something happened downstairs.

B: What happened?

A: Mr. Sun Wu’s family in Shijia Hutong ordered a roast duck at Biianfang. After it was roasted, the little apprentice sent it away. If it was easier to handle two ducks, they could be carried on a pole. But this was a duck and it had to be nestled on a small pole. The young apprentice turned south after leaving the fresh fish mouth and didn't pay attention. The pole hit someone's cheek again: "Hey! Where are you hitting it?" "I didn't see it, I'm sorry!" "I didn't see it, why do you have eyes?" The little apprentice couldn't speak either: "Ah! Touch it. It doesn't matter!" "What do you mean it doesn't matter?" He rolled up his sleeves and hit the little disciple on the head with his fist. The young apprentice was anxious, so he swung the pole and hit it. He forgot that there was a duck hanging behind it. When he swung the pole like this, the duck's head fell off and he was swung out. The place where we are sitting is the window facing the street, and this duck is being swung in through the top window. Snap! It fell on our table and it was still hot. Everyone said: "Hey! The roast duck will fly up!" Do you understand?

B: Then what do you mean by flying up? That was brought up!

C: Alas! Yes...that's what happened!

A: (Lab Bing) Hey...how are you talking? Can roast duck fly? The more you say it, the more outrageous it becomes!

C: You really did it!

A: How about this mantle?

C: It doesn’t matter if I wear it for another three months!

A: Then you have to be careful when you speak. How about we go?

C: Let’s go now and say a few more words.

(Telling to B) I’m back after dinner. It’s hot. I couldn’t sleep at night, so I just listened to the beeping outside!

B: Are there crickets chirping?

C: Hey! You know I love to play with crickets. I quickly got up, took the skewer and the cover, and went to the yard to listen to them. Dududuer.

B: Where in the courtyard?

C: No, it’s at the door!

B: Ah!

C: Open the door and go to the door. When you hear this, the cricket is running away!

B: Where did you go?

C: The sports car is at the station. I chased him to the station and heard again that this cricket, Duerduer, had arrived in Yangcun! The couple of us chased again until we reached Yangcun. When we heard that the cricket had arrived in Tianjin! When I chased him to Tianjin, I heard that this cricket, Duerduer, had arrived in Tangshan! When I chased him to a hill in Tangshan, I heard Duer Duer screaming there. The two of us borrowed pickaxes and started digging, digging! Plane! We dug all the way to Shanhaiguan and dug out the crickets. This cricket turned out and I took a look, oh! This one is too big! This head is not much smaller than this room! The whiskers and tails are as long as fourteen trains! (A unbuttons his mantle, listening while unbuttoning) These two whiskers are like two telegraph poles! The two eyes are like two searchlights!

B: What was the result?

C: How is it! Caught! Got the thread tied back. (A takes off his mantle and puts it on C's shoulders, C doesn't know yet and says) Come and have a look at our house tomorrow, the call is really nice: Du'er Du'er.

B: Okay! OK! What you said is not human anymore! Where is this happening?

C: If you don’t believe me, ask him? He knows.

B: Okay, okay, (to A) I have to ask you.

A: Is there a cricket? Its head is not much smaller than this room. It also needs a tail as long as fourteen trains. Its two whiskers are like two telegraph poles, and its two eyes are like searchlights. Similar.

B: Yes. Is there such a thing?

A: It’s nothing, it’s nonsense!

C: (asking A) Hey! I said so.

A: You don’t even know what you’re talking about!

C: What?

A: I’ll give you the mantle!