Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - What unforgettable experiences do you have on the long-distance bus that are worth sharing?
What unforgettable experiences do you have on the long-distance bus that are worth sharing?
17 went to Hangzhou on business and didn't buy a high-speed rail ticket. I have no choice but to take the bus. After eight hours' journey, I was still carsick, and I felt empty before I got on the bus. At that time, I listened to my parents, took a bunch of oranges, went to the drugstore to buy motion sickness stickers and motion sickness medicine, and even put two sleeping pills in my pocket, hoping to sleep immediately after getting on the bus and sleep in Hangzhou.
I got on the bus at 8: 50 in the morning. Luckily, I was at the window, sitting next to a girl. It's better than me getting on the bus and being a stingy man next to me. When I got on the bus, I posted motion sickness first, and the bus started. At first, it was fine. The car is parked in the suburbs, but it needs to cross the city and get on the expressway. Oh, my God, the bus starts and stops. Less than half an hour later, I began to feel sick. At that time, I scolded the doctor who sold me motion sickness medicine half to death. I bought the best carsickness medicine, but it didn't work.
I quickly peeled the orange and smelled the orange peel. Needless to say, it is really useful. The girl next to me smiled contemptuously when she saw me like this. I remember that expression all my life. Cold eyes, I was furious. Will a seven-foot man be looked down upon by a bitch? I closed my eyes decisively and never thought about carsickness again.
It's much better when you get on the highway. When I arrived in Hangzhou in the evening, it happened to be the peak period. God, that feeling is back. In order to save face, I have been struggling to support, and I am determined not to spit. For this, my face flushed. The girl next to me smiled directly after reading it. Although the light was insufficient, I was sure that she smiled. Then I heard her say that she would get carsick when she was old. I want to refute her, but I feel sick as soon as I open my mouth. For the sake of quality, I said nothing.
Finally, the bus arrived at the station and everyone started to get off. I want to fly, but the woman next to me seems to be carrying me behind her back. It's very slow, so I have to put up with it. She went downstairs slowly, and she kept saying that she was unlucky, so I threw up after a train ride. My first reaction was, did I throw up? Why did I say disgusting? Did I throw up in my sleep? Before I could speak, an aunt in front of her suddenly turned around and vomited. The sight is unbearable to look straight at. After vomiting, my aunt also said, girl, I can't stand you all the way. There's really no way. Sorry, my aunt helped you wash clothes. Ha ha laugh
About 2002, I was still serving in the army. When I went home to visit my relatives, I got off the train from the city and took a long-distance bus back to my hometown! As a result, two things happened in succession, which impressed me deeply!
It was the twelfth lunar month, and there were many people by car. There are people from neighboring counties who work in cities, those who buy new year's goods, and those who work outside. There are so many people of all kinds! When the train started, a girl dressed as a student squeezed in with a big box! I got on the bus and found that there were too many people, so I had to go down and wait for the next bus! But just after the girl got off the bus, the driver started the car and the girl's box was still in the car! The driver didn't pay attention and left as soon as he stepped on the gas pedal. The girl cried and chased! Passengers on the bus can't persuade the driver! I took out my certificate, reprimanded the driver for pulling over and sent the box to the girl! Back in the car, the driver swore after I scolded him a few words, honest!
Halfway out of the city, another thing happened! At that time, I was enjoying the scenery of my hometown three years later through the window, while listening to the familiar local accent of the passengers on the bus! Turning my head, I saw a young man reaching for the bag of the passenger in front! As soon as I saw it was a thief, I patted the passenger in front of me on the shoulder, pretended to be broad-minded, and asked him where his family was from. One build, one build! I thought the thief would have scruples, but after a while, he started again, gave me a bad look, pointed his other hand at me and whispered, Mind your own business! This made me very angry, shouting to catch a thief, holding a phone card in my hand, striding towards his hand and kicking him with my left foot! The driver is also an asshole. He even said let's go down and fight. The passengers around us even hid far away and didn't even call the police! After the car stopped at the side of the road, the thief jumped out of the window and ran away, clutching his cut hand! I wanted to call the police, but everyone urged me to go home, so I had to give up! After the bus started again, the passengers said that many of them actually knew the thief! He is a habitual thief and a small gang. Usually more than two people commit crimes. I came out alone today and I don't know why I met him! I feel scared, too. If I catch up with someone else's gang, I'll suffer a big loss that day!
These two things are out of date. In recent years, with the overall improvement of people's quality, people's awareness of security is also strengthening, and most people will not stand by when they encounter things! I hope there are more sunrise people around us!
On March 8th one year, the company organized a trip to Guilin.
There are not many people in our company, four men and one woman. We were fighting with others.
As soon as I got on the bus, there was a car full of women.
After walking for a few hours, the tour guide will interact with us by playing some small games and telling jokes.
When we arrived at our company, the tour guide teased us and asked us how men followed women.
I reacted quickly and said that the boss of our company is a woman. She said that our male colleagues usually work hard and sympathize with us. They asked us to travel in March, and our female colleagues stayed.
My answer immediately caused a burst of applause, and all the women on the bus praised our boss and the company.
The tour group spent two days in Guilin, finally had dinner in Yangshuo, and then turned around and returned to Shenzhen.
Unexpectedly, something happened before we got halfway!
It is estimated that the ingredients for dinner are not fresh, and almost everyone begins to have diarrhea.
The tour guide discussed with us whether to go to the hospital to see a doctor or go back to Shenzhen.
A busload of people said they had to rush to work on Monday and unanimously decided to carry it hard.
The tour guide had no choice but to let the driver continue on the road and stop at each service area.
In this way, we got on the expressway very embarrassedly.
Because it is the March 8th Festival, almost all the tourist buses parked in the high-speed service area are women, and the women's restrooms are obviously not enough.
There are some silly elder sisters in our car, and they are already thinking about the men's room.
Fortunately, in the big service area, they are not so crazy to occupy the men's bathroom.
But not in the small service area.
When I was in Zengcheng, I passed a small service area.
Those silly big sisters looked at the long line in front of the women's bathroom, and it was estimated that they couldn't stay up, so they began to occupy the men's bathroom.
I'm fine. I didn't unbutton my belt.
One of my colleagues was almost dragged out by the silly elder sister while squatting in the pit.
They sent several people to watch the door and wouldn't let us in.
We reason with them, and they say you men are easy to solve, just find a grass to squat down!
I can't compete with them, and I'm afraid I'll miss getting on the bus, so I went to the side to find grass with three other male colleagues.
There is a factory next to the service area, which looks shabby and seems abandoned.
Colleague Xiao Chen said that there must be a bathroom in the factory. Let's go in.
When I walked into the factory, I saw two small houses around the corner, which looked like bathrooms.
The four of us rushed over.
Before I ran to the small house, I heard a dog barking.
Some big German shepherds jumped out of the small house and rushed at us.
We immediately realized that this was the house where people watched the old factory keep dogs.
The four men turned and ran, with seven or eight German shepherd chasing after them.
I didn't know what I was thinking at that time, and I was a little desperate.
We ran to the men's room in the service area in one breath, and those silly big sisters who guarded the door were even more afraid of dogs than we were, and they scared away with a sigh.
We ran into the bathroom and the German shepherd rushed in.
The woman who stood in line in the toilet immediately fried the pot and cried for her mother to escape.
The women squatting in the pit don't know what's going on outside. They are all shouting and asking questions. It's funny to think of me.
Fortunately, these dogs are fierce, but they don't bite, so they didn't cause a big disaster.
Back on the bus, there are still two hours' journey from Shenzhen.
The four of us were scolded by women all over the car.
Well, let me talk about the long-distance trip that I personally remember deeply. I believe that most young people have not experienced it now.
Now it's about 14, 15 years. At that time, I came to work here in Zhejiang for the first time from my hometown, and I had to go through Hubei. At that time, there was no high speed, and the car had to turn over the mountain. I still remember what the driver told us at that time. When I went up the mountain, all the young and strong people sat in the front, while women, old people and children sat behind. In special circumstances, everyone has to help. At that time, I didn't know why the driver said that. My uncle told me that there were robbers on the mountain. Later, when I reached the mountain, the car slowly got up. Suddenly 10 people came out from the roadside and chased the car to pull the window glass (the long-distance buses at that time were all glass windows). Fortunately, we still have 15.6 strong men, who chased us for a while and then ran away. As an honest man, I still remember the scene at that time. Later, my uncle told me here.
Then there is food here. Drivers were forced to eat at that time. Every time they eat, they drive to a very remote place. As soon as they got off the bus, a dozen or twenty tiger-shaped men gathered around and rushed there to eat like ducks. If you don't eat, you have to buy his things. They beat you if you don't spend money. hey
All of the above are personal experiences. If there is any similarity, it is for reference only.
I had a narrow escape.
In the summer of 2008, I went to Taizhou, Zhejiang on business. I bought a bus ticket from Taizhou to Changzhou after work. This is a sleeping car. My berth is at the back of the car, which is also the upper berth. Sleeper buses in Zhejiang are relatively clean, so you should take off your shoes after getting on. Because I didn't sleep well the night before, I got on the bus and fell asleep on the bunk.
Departing at about eleven o'clock in the morning, the bus left Taizhou Expressway in less than an hour, and it was past twelve o'clock. "Smoke, smoke!" Someone shouted. I was awakened. Smoke comes from the back of the vehicle. I opened my eyes and found myself in the smoke. The driver who heard the shouts had stopped and rushed down with a fire extinguisher. The fire is developing so fast that spraying a fire extinguisher won't help. People in the car began to get off, and I couldn't get off because I was in the back and in the upper berth. I started looking for my luggage from the bunk. I brought two bags, bigger ones, clothes and the like, as well as small packages of documents and electronic products. At this time, the smoke in the car was rolling and I couldn't breathe. I just held my breath and touched the luggage on the berth. Grab a small bag and touch the big bag to find it. Looking for shoes, I felt a shoe and finally couldn't hold it. I turned and ran to the door. When I backed into the door, I saw a shoe in my hand, then turned around and threw a shoe in. At this point, there is a raging flame in the back half of the vehicle.
In this way, I turned and got off, eager to run. Wearing only a pair of socks, running on the hot asphalt road. Running 40 to 50 meters away from the car, I saw that 30 to 40 passengers who got off the car basically only wore socks.
At this point, the flame in the bus has filled the whole carriage. Because the car is full of quilts, leather, clothes and other flammable items. In about half an hour, the whole car was swallowed up by the fire. Because it was a diesel car, there was a small explosion and the fuel tank was burnt out. After a while, the fire truck arrived, and the fire on the car was a little smaller. It was put out in a few minutes. At this time, only the dark car shell is left.
Next to the expressway is a vineyard, and all the vines near the expressway were killed by fire.
After a while, people from the bus company came and took dozens of our passengers without shoes to the front service area. We waited for an hour or two and someone brought us slippers. Because some people brought a lot of luggage, a lot of property was burned. The bus company refused to pay compensation, and we people negotiated with them until after twelve o'clock at night. This kind of hardship, our phone call to the Zhejiang Provincial Governor's hotline! In the end, I only got a small amount of compensation! One of the young couples left Taizhou with all their belongings and suffered a serious loss!
After this incident, I basically stopped taking the bus!
Finally, I hope my friends who share a car with me are healthy and happy now!
I took a long-distance sleeper from Lanzhou to Qingdao and brought a box, which is a box of communication equipment of the company.
After getting on the bus, I put the box under the sleeper. Lying on the bunk, next to two single sleepers, ready to sleep. I'm outside, and there's another person inside.
On the way to the gas station, the driver asked us to go to the toilet. One of them woke up, and I found out that it was a petite young girl with long hair. She smiled at me.
This smile made my little rabbit thump, and she was lying next to me. How can I sleep?
Find a topic to talk to her. Her voice is different from her figure, and the volume is high. When I open my mouth, I can hear it all over the car, which makes me embarrassed and lets others know that I don't have a good rest and only know how to pick up girls. Want to talk but dare not.
There are other ways. Send text messages. We were right next to each other, not talking, texting and chatting for half a night, and there was no war all night.
At dawn, I arrived in Luoyang and was about to get off. Reluctantly, I woke her up and shook her hand. With a little effort, she let out a cry.
Hurry back to the dormitory to sleep.
After a good sleep, it's time to find a job in the company. I just found that I left the box of equipment in the car, and it should still be under the lower berth. It's been four hours since I got off the bus. I panicked in an instant, and that box of equipment was worth more than 20 thousand.
Dare not reply to the company. Things are gone, and I will definitely be scolded if I go. Suddenly I thought of a petite girl. I sent her a text message and she replied to me. The box is still under the sleeper. I asked him to collect it for me, and I went to Qingdao to get it.
Yes, I went to Qingdao to pick it up. I flew. Recently, a plane flew directly to Qingdao and went straight to Qingdao Airport Passenger Station.
After waiting for several hours, I finally saw the bus arrive at the passenger station. The girl got out of the car with a box. I was suddenly excited and went up to hug the girl.
A wonderful meeting saved my life. Although I had a gentle hug, I dared not stop for a long time. I immediately flew back to Luoyang to find a job without being scolded.
Since then, I have a sweet concern in my heart.
I just finished the college entrance examination that year. It was the summer vacation of 20 10. My mother worked in a fast food restaurant in Shenzhen for three months, and then I followed her to work. I was just 18 years old that year.
Three months after the completion of the project, the school is ready to start school, so I am ready to go home, with more than 3,000 yuan earned from working and a fake Nokia. Because it is in the suburb far away from Shenzhen and the bus stop, we can only wait for the bus on the roadside and take a bus back to Guangxi.
The night before, my mother had arranged with the bus driver where to wait for me. Then while I was waiting for the bus, a car with a sleeper stopped and asked me if I was going back to Guangxi. I said yes, and then I got on the bus without thinking much. Then I called my mother and told her that I had got on the bus. But in fact, I got on the wrong bus. That bus has been in Shenzhen for a long time and has been soliciting customers. As long as they go back to Guangxi, they are all pulled into the car. Later, in the car, many people actually got together to gamble. I lay in a remote position behind the car. I happen to be next to a student of Guangxi University. He told me that there was something wrong with the car. When I arrived at the service area, he asked me to get off with him and then find a car to go back to Guangxi. I was very scared. Those people blocked the money in the car, many people lost it, and then they were directly driven out of the car.
I have no money with me, only a card. There is also a drug addict in the car. An old man has a small bag with 50 thousand yuan in cash. A drug addict actually fed the old man water with medicine, snatched the old man's bag and got off the bus. The old man's eyes turned white and our mobile phone was taken away at that time. He was really scared at that time. Slowly, almost everyone in the car was driven off. There are no more than 10 people left in the car, all of whom are young people with no money. The driver drove us to another car on the side of the road returning to Guangxi, and there was nothing we could do at that time. Fortunately, the bus on the bus was quite regular, but the bus took us to Yulin without taking us to our destination. The driver said that his car would only go to Yulin, so we had to transfer at Yulin to go home. When changing trains, several of us discussed the risks of getting on a black car together. Fortunately, none of us had any accidents.
According to the normal distance from Shenzhen to our home, we should be home the next morning, because the black car took too long to turn, so there was no news of him the next night. The mobile phone was taken away and I couldn't contact my home. My dad is really worried at home. When I arrived at Yulin Station, it was already late at night. I called my dad back when there was no car in the morning for seven days. My father said that he never heard from me again.
Later, I got home safely. When I got home, I told my dad about the process of taking a black car. My dad was really worried about me and said that I couldn't sleep all night after I came back.
After this incident, I never took a long-distance bus by the side of the road again. I really have to take a ride home at the regular station no matter how far it is.
I remember it was1late October 15+ 165438+. After the meeting in Linyi, Shandong Province, I took a bus from Linyi to Linfen. After getting on the bus in the afternoon, the weather changed suddenly, it was sleet, and the car was very slow on the expressway. Most people in the car are from Linfen, and everyone is worried, but everyone has been encouraging drivers not to get off the highway before 65438+ at night. I can hear a car bumping in the street from time to time. The driver said he wouldn't leave, so he drove to the service area, but the service area was closed, so I had no choice but to find the nearest highway exit. I didn't know it was Kaifeng city until I got off. The bus master took us to the long-distance station, but I had no choice but to take us to the railway station where the waiting hall was closed.
When we arrived at the railway station, it was about 12 pm. Seven or eight people we know get together in a pile. There was no heating in the waiting room at that time. ) We are thin, so we have to buy Erguotou to eat peanuts. While everyone was drinking, a middle-aged woman suddenly burst into tears, saying that if something happened, we would all be finished, still holding a bottle there and vowing never to take a long-distance bus again! In fact, everyone was very scared, but fortunately they arrived in the waiting room safely. Everyone waited a long time to get tickets. When asked that the train was also late and there was no high-speed rail, we had to buy a train ticket to Sanmenxia. Wait, the train hasn't moved yet. We were freezing, drinking and drinking. Everyone is drinking back to back, and no one is drunk. Everyone's heart is in fear. No one is afraid and no one is sleepy.
We just wandered around the hall, and the cold was unbearable, so we ran a few steps. At that time, several people called to complain, but the scene was particularly chaotic. We were calm and said it was much better than on the bus. At 4 o'clock in the afternoon, the radio said that the train from Suzhou to Linfen was coming into the station. We rushed to the platform like chicken blood, and the ticket inspector couldn't stop us. After getting on the bus, the two women cried again. Maybe. It has been several years, but it has been affecting me. It's really a life-and-death disaster! I hope my friends will go out to watch the weather! Have a good travel environment! Safety first!
Forty years ago, I worked as an agricultural worker in Xinjiang Production Corps, and it was particularly difficult to go home during the Spring Festival. The company is near the T-junction where the bus is waiting, and there is a branch road on Highway 3. Get up before six o'clock in the morning and wait for the bus at the T-junction at seven o'clock. If I miss the only bus, I won't be able to return to Shihezi for the Spring Festival.
I carried a bag of frozen tofu and tofu skin for my family and walked along the ridge road on the branch canal with one foot deep and one foot shallow. Some roads are only 20 centimeters wide when I step on the snow. I hurried on before dawn. So at the waiting intersection, I never saw the old Jiefang bus that was often crowded with passengers. It was not until after eight o'clock that the cyclist of 133 told me that the bus had passed.
But I had to walk along the empty road through the snow to Anjihai Town, 30 kilometers away, and take a ride home on the May 1st Highway. I didn't get on the bus until I arrived in Anjihai Town at noon 12 and returned to Shihezi, 60 kilometers away. I had a happy Spring Festival with my parents. I never told them that I had walked more than 30 kilometers for fear that they would appreciate me.
Now there is a shuttle bus to Shihezi every day, which leaves in less than an hour.
- Previous article:A particularly funny joke, animal dialogue
- Next article:Humorous self-introduction jingle _ funny self-introduction
- Related articles
- How do girls reply when they say it's funny
- Tell a few jokes to relieve boredom.
- Love letter.-How are you? I'm fine.
- Listen to the story and guess the ending.
- What does it mean to lose copper?
- The feeling of failing the exam. Talk about 40 common sentences.
- What is Wang Xifeng's joke about Lin Daiyu?
- Quick search: a joke about "water resources"
- When someone asks you how much you earn, Gao EQ answers.
- About mythical TV dramas, what wonderful dramas have made classics?