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Funny quotes that hit the nail on the head

Funny quotes to the point

Funny quotes to the point. People with a sense of humor are generally liked by everyone. Everyone likes people with a sense of humor. Some funny quotes The jokes or sentences will make people think they are very funny. The following is a collection of funny quotes that are to the point. Funny quotes that are to the point 1

1. What’s wrong with being ugly? As long as you don't look in the mirror, it's not you who is disgusting.

2. What is the idea of ????a foodie? If it tastes good, eat more of it, and if it doesn't taste good, you should eat more of it.

3. Rainy days are suitable for sleeping at home, sunny days are suitable for going out for a walk. For a long time, there is no day suitable for going to work.

4. My mother looked at the beautiful daughter of a relative and said to me: "My face looks like someone who has been through it, but your face looks like someone who has been sitting on it!"

5. You If you don't push yourself, you won't know what despair is.

6. Although moody girls in love can make people overwhelmed, they can also effectively promote China's intangible cultural heritage: changing faces.

7. Many poor people will discuss whether money or love is more important. Both of them are none of your business, okay?

8. When you meet someone you like, pursue it bravely, so that you can know that there is far more than one person who will reject you.

9. A buddy in the dormitory sprayed all corners of his body with insecticide. I asked curiously: "There are no mosquitoes anymore, why should I spray insecticide?" The buddy said: "Get out. On a date, I ran out of perfume, so I made do with pesticides."

10. God gave me a broad face just to magnify my beauty.

11. I once thought that as long as I worked hard and ran forward, poverty and loneliness would not be able to catch up with me. But who would have thought that what couldn't catch up with me was my hairline.

12. I finally discovered that the reason why some foodies want to find someone to fall in love with is simply because the food in some places is not suitable for eating alone.

13. I saw a beggar on the street and I asked him: "You have hands and feet, why do you still beg?" "Although I have hands and feet, I have no money."

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14. I had a very unrealistic dream last night. I dreamed that I became a multi-millionaire. This is not a good sign. Really, I usually make billions.

15. At the class reunion, everyone was chatting happily and asked the monitor what he was doing now. The monitor said proudly: Doing jewelry business! Everyone admired him so much, his wife slapped him and shouted: If you sell piglets, you sell piglets, what kind of jewelry business! The squad leader cried sadly: Isn’t the piggy just a baby pig? Why can't we talk about Zhubao business?

16. As long as you work very hard, one day you will find that you can never close the gap between you and the rich.

17. I have a colleague who is allergic to mutton. His face swells whenever he eats mutton, so everyone takes him with him every time he eats kebabs. The more swollen his face is, the more authentic the mutton from that restaurant is. .

18. I was watching TV with my wife, and a news survey happened to be broadcast: "70% of men want to have extramarital affairs." I immediately confessed to my wife: "I definitely belong to the 30% of men. Really.” At this time, the TV continued: “The other 30% of men have had extramarital affairs.”

19. Losing weight is not that easy. Its temper is that after it reaches the age where it can’t gain weight, it’s better to give up if it struggles.

When I was a child, every time my mother hit me, she would say: "The hit on your body hurts my heart." I said, "Then why do you still hit me?" Mom: "I like the feeling of heartache."

21. I was very homesick when I was working abroad. One night I drank too much and I felt like I missed my mother very much. So I called him: "Mom, I will still be your son in the next life!" The mother on the other end of the phone was silent for a long time, and she was probably very moved. Finally, she said: "Next life? In the next life, just let me go... ”

22. The law of conservation of singles: The total amount of singles always remains unchanged, and singles will neither be created nor disappear out of thin air. It just transfers from one person to another.

23. Life is like a dream, I always have insomnia; life is like a play, I always get in trouble; life is like a song, I always go out of tune; life is like a battlefield, I always get off track.

24. If I had known that today’s world is about appearance, I should have used the money from school to have plastic surgery. Funny Quotes to the Point 2

1. Every time I see you eating pork, I feel very emotional. Originally from the same roots. Why is it too urgent to fry each other?

2. There is a kind of sadness called, I reply to you in seconds, and you reply to me in reincarnation.

3. When I hate someone, if that person suddenly says he likes me, then I don’t hate him at all. I am so principled, because I cannot hate a person with vision.

4. In the past, it was a husband and wife who never left each other, but now they are a mobile phone. Once the phone is in your hand, it lasts forever. If the phone is not in your hand, your soul will be gone.

5. I just saw a figure that looked very much like you. I ran after him like crazy. Then I remembered that you were not in this city, and I stopped. I put down the brick in my hand and almost hit the wrong person.

6. If you gain three kilograms during the festival, take a closer look at the three kilograms. I tried my best to lose weight for half a year, but before I succeeded, I celebrated the new year again.

7. There is no such thing as a banquet that lasts forever, but if you treat me, I can eat more with you.

8. You always say that your dreams are out of reach, but you never go to bed early or get up early.

9. I never dreamed that Didi could reach a truck.

10. Staying up late is because you don’t have the courage to end the day. Staying in bed is because you don’t have the courage to start the day.

11. If I had known that this was a world where looks were important, I would have spent the money from school on plastic surgery.

12. Some people look elegant and calm on the surface, but secretly check express delivery information several times a day.

13. Some people say that I am ugly. I am very sad and feel sorry for her. She is blind at a young age.

14. Do you know how disgusting you are? When your mother first felt your presence, she threw up, and she kept throwing up for months.

15. Nowadays, the bus is too crowded. I wanted to fart secretly, but it forced me to burp.

16. I may not be able to lift a hundred kilograms of stone, but if it is a hundred kilograms of coins, I will definitely pick it up and run.

17. I should let you know that I love you.

18. Life will make you miserable for a while, and after you adapt, it will make you miserable for the rest of your life.

19. Silence is golden, don’t talk to me, I want to save money.

20. Turning off the lights on the earth for one hour is not economical at all. How many people can be created by turning off the lights for one hour?

21. A good woman is like gasoline. Once you have it, you will have power; a bad woman is like an air bag. Once you use it, there will be danger.

22. If you slightly lower your ideal standards for choosing a mate, you will find that boys who are slightly worse than your ideal type are not attracted to you either.

23. Try to bring together classmates around you, and you will save a lot of money in the future.

24. If you are in a relationship with someone who is big in your circle, you will never have to eat in your life just to be jealous.

25. At the same age as a flower, it has grown into a succulent one.

26. If poverty limits your imagination, why can you still come up with so many ways to save money?

27. When I don’t want to care about you, it’s useless for you to coax me. At this time, you have to send me a red envelope.