Who has the contact address of LRC lyrics ~ urgent!

I have not only a car, but also my own!

3. If you like it, I'll buy it for you ... (after realizing that the other person is angry) Oh, no, it's "brother, I'll buy it for you!"

There are so many people who look down on me. Who are you?

I won't tell you if you kill me, but you haven't made a beautiful plan yet!

6. Not only am I lucky, but I also have athlete's foot!

7. Mirrors always reflect light!

8. Is there a P for handsome? Probably eaten by a pawn!

9. Give it to me, and you don't have to worry. There is nothing wrong!

10. Relax, I'm not a good person. ......

1 1. Don't worry about what will happen to my girlfriend following me-as long as she lays eggs all her life, we will break them immediately and never let the principal and parents know!

12. How dare I charge you if you don't thank me!

13. Don't tell me to bring it on-I'm in love for two generations!

14. If you ignore me, I will be a dog!

15. When will there be a bright moon? Ask Yi Zhongtian!

16. You can't reach it. Try stepping on your right foot with your left foot.

17. Some people are alive and she is dead. Some people are alive, and he should have died!

18. You said ... Do you like me? Actually ... first of all ... actually, I also ... I told you, actually, I like myself.

19. Do you drink water, drink water or drink water? You choose!

20. Castle Peak is still there, but it is a little red.

2 1. Hey, say what should be said and whisper what shouldn't be said.

22. Can you say stealing about a scholar?

23. Damn it, don't ask single men such questions!

24. Zi once said: Don't take my tolerance for you as your shameless capital!

25. Don't think I'm out of reach just because I'm handsome. In fact, I am a sea of rivers.

26. Today the weather is fine, windy and rainy.

27. As a typical failure, you really succeeded!

I really want to kill this bug, but my tongue is not long enough. ...

29. Two heads are better than one, and one is Zhuge Liang.

30. In this golden autumn of red leaves and maple leaves. ......

3 1. One thyroid hormone was cut and the other was not.

32. If you bother me again, I'll tie you to a straw boat and borrow an arrow!

33. The wind is rustling and the water is cold. Pay back the money you owe!

34. A: Where to eat? I have no money.

B: Let's go to the restaurant. It's on me.-the hose.

35. See if there is anything left.

36. There is a dragon on my left and a Mickey Mouse tattooed on my waist. 38. A: Without revenge, it's hard to swallow this evil spirit.

B: Then how can I let you die?

40. She is so fat that my thigh can't twist her arm.

4 1. There is a saying in Shushan, do it first, and learn from the endless sea to make porridge.

42. The world belongs to us and our sons, but in the end it belongs to our grandchildren.

43. I will do my homework!

44. Have you done your homework?

B: Yes! Well, it's still warm under p shares ... do you want it? So you're here.

45. Who is sitting in the village today? He doesn't even clean the blackboard!

46. How much is this pair of shoes?

1. A male deer walked faster and faster, and finally became a road (deer)! ! ! !

2. Two tomatoes cross the road, a car flies by, one of them can't escape and is squashed, and the other tomato points to the squashed tomato and laughs: dig hahaha, ketchup …

The wolf said, "I will eat you!" ! ! "Guess what?

As a result, the wolf ate the lamb.

4. The stone fights with the rice cake, and the stone flies and kicks the rice cake into the sea. ..........

Once upon a time, there was a pair of lovers who decided to join the army for life, so they made an oath with the girl, gave her a diamond ring, and agreed to meet her three years later today. At that time, the ring will be used as a wedding ring. Three years later, the girl has been waiting for the boy, but she can't. Sad and desperate, she threw the diamond ring into the sea and moved away. However, the boy has been waiting.

Rice cake! ! !

5. Is jiaozi a boy or a girl?

Answer the boy because jiaozi has a foreskin.

6. There is a duck named Xiao Huang. One day, he was hit by a car. He shouted, "Gung!" From then on, he became a cucumber! !

7. The matchstick suddenly felt itchy, so I reached out to scratch it and burned myself to death …

8. Once upon a time, there was a bird.

He passes through a cornfield every day.

But unfortunately,

One day, a fire broke out in the cornfield.

All the corn has turned into popcorn.

After the bird flew over, ...

I think it will be very cold if it snows. ...

9. When will Taiwan Province Province be reunified?

When buying instant noodles

10. Asun and appa have nothing to talk about, and time waits for no one.

A song: "Recalling childhood, the happiest thing is Children's Day."

Apa: "Youth Day is in ten years."

A song: "Father's Day is in ten years."

Apa: "It will be the days of the elderly in a few decades."

A song: "In a few decades."

Appa: Tomb-Sweeping Day.

1 1. Soldier: "Thirst ... Thirst ..."

Cao Cao: "Hold on a little longer! I have been to this place before, and I remember there is a merlin nearby, which may arrive in a moment. "

Soldier: "Oh! There are plums to eat! Oh! "

Half an hour later-Coss: "Master! The expedition found a lot of water! "

Cao Cao: "Ha ha ha ha, did you hear that? Finally, there is water to drink. "

Soldier: "If you don't go ... you must find Plum ..."12. A girl is lovelorn. I advised her: "Toads with two legs are hard to find, and men with three legs are plentiful!" "

13. One day, Xiao Qiang asked his father, "Dad, am I a stupid child?" Dad said, "Silly boy, how can you be a silly boy?"

14. A medium-rare steak and a medium-rare steak meet in the street. Why don't they say hello? (assuming they can talk)

because ..............

because ................

Because they are all strangers ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

15. Question: How to make sparrows quiet?

Answer: Click.

Reason: Silence (silence).

16. A college student was unfortunately caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, "Say, where are you from?" I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! ! ! "College students replied to the enemy's words and were electrocuted. ...

He said, "I'm from TV University!"

17.a: "I'll take you to a place where all girls don't wear bras."

B: "Really? Where is it? Take me away! "

A: "It's in the kindergarten next door!"

18. Wang, the host of Happy Dictionary, interviewed a program audience and asked, "Who is your favorite hostess?" The audience said, "It's you." Wang asked, "Why do you say that?" The audience said, "Because you look a bit like Yang Lan!"

19. Do you know what color Spider-Man is?

Red, wrong!

It is white.

Look at Spider-Man's English: Spider-Man (a white man)

20. Why did Xiao Ming fall?

Please think twice ........................

Because the floor is slippery.

2 1. After the party, a group of animals rushed into the 7- 1 1 convenience store to buy things. Because it was too noisy, the clerk knocked it out, but left the lamb alone in the store. Why?

Convenience stores are open 24 hours a day. ...

22. The glass and coffee cup crossed the road together, and suddenly someone shouted: Here comes the bus!

As a result, the glass was hit by a car and the coffee cup was fine. Why?

Coffee cups have ears!

23. A horse said that our company has launched a new product, Ass 3, or MP3…… for short ...

24. I hate two kinds of people most:

First, there is racial discrimination;

The second is black;

Third, I can't count!

25. Thanks to madoka ozawa Gang, Ran Asakawa, Ai Nagase, Sanzhu liang zi, Gao Qiao Maria, Kawamoto Dance, Youmu Pupil, Natsume Mishi, Naomai Qinchi, Shiraishi, Kudo Kwai, Seiichi Kosha, kishida fumio, Zewaixing, Fujisaki Ayaka, Yeshanづき and Chihiro Inoue. When I was in the worst spirit, they came to comfort me at the right time; When I was exhausted from playing CS, it was they who made me feel unobstructed pleasure. When I feel depressed, they make me feel excited ~

26. Now the accuracy of earthquake prediction has really improved a lot, only two words are missing this time: the prediction is in Heilongjiang, but the result is in Jiujiang!

27. Jane Zhang said, "My fans say my idol is Ying."

He Jie said: "My fans say my idol is Jay."

"My fans say my idol is Chang."

Chris Lee said: "You talk, I'll go first!"

28. Five Fuwa get together to chat.

Beibei suggested: Let's give ourselves a nickname. I'll call it Beva!

Jingjing: Then my name is Jingwa!

Huanhuan: My name is Huanwa!

Nini: My name is "Niwa"!

Yingying stood up and said, You can chat. I have something to do. I have to go first. ...

It is said that in 2058, five Fuwa got together to chat again.

Beibei: Let's talk about our nicknames again. People respect me very much and call me "Mr. Bei"!

Huanhuan: People call me "Ye Huan"!

Nini: Everyone calls me Grandpa Ni!

Yingying: Everyone calls me Yingying!

Jingjing stood up and said, You talk. I have something to do. I have to go first. ...

29. When winter came, I decided to keep the habit of taking a cold bath, but after washing, I found myself back to my childhood! ! !

30. Celery was walking when he suddenly felt a pain in his stomach. Then he said, "Shh!" What did you say he took out? That's celery dung (diligence)! ! ! What color is celery (vegetable) dung?

Answer: yellow.

Because: Qin Shihuang (Qin Shihuang)

3 1. There is a fat man.

Jump off the top of the twentieth floor. ...

It turned out to be .....

Fat man! !

Once upon a time, there was a piece of bread. It felt hungry and ate itself.

Once upon a time, there was a glass of beer. It felt thirsty and drank it. ..

Once upon a time, there was a virgin who felt tired and let herself fall asleep.

33. Who is the ancestor of mankind?

It's peanuts because peanuts ~ ~ ~

34. Which ancient figure was a white-collar worker?

Meng Mu's Three Movements (Thousands)

35. Zhang Fei: "Stop the old thief!"

Yan Yan: "Ring-eyed thief! Dismount and die! "

Police car: "Listen, two thieves ~ ~ ~ You are surrounded ~ ~ ~ Drop your weapons ..."

36. How did the ants die after falling from the Himalayas?

Answer: I am starving. Because it is too light, it will take a long time to float down …

37. The world's largest KB diary

Old bear was about to write a diary when he found that the diary had been used up. He wanted to go out and buy another book, but it was already twelve o'clock at night. But he rode his bike and looked for it in the dark street. After searching for a long time, I finally found a bookstore and went before closing. He likes a diary very much, so he asks his boss how much it costs.

The boss said in a low voice, "This is imported, and the price should be set in 70 yuan ..."

The old bear said, "It's so expensive, but I have to pay 50 yuan."

The boss said, "It doesn't matter, even if you are at 50 yuan."

The old bear said happily, "Thank you, boss."

The boss said in a very low and gloomy voice, "When you buy it back, don't turn to the last page, or something very KB will happen." Don't blame me for not reminding you! "

The old bear said, "Well, I see."

Old bear bought his diary home. He opened the package and put it on the table in front of the room window. At this time, he wants to take a bath and then come out to write a diary. ...

After taking a shower, Lao Xiong found that the window in front of the desk was actually open, and the wind blew the diary page by page ... When the last page was blown, Lao Xiong stepped forward to stop it, but it was too late, and the last page was blown away by the wind.

KB happened ... I saw the old bear let out a scream because he saw the last page, which read:

(Please pull down)

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.............. pulls again. ...

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Keep pulling ...

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Soon, pull a little more ...

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Well, I'm finally going to pull a little …

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The last page reads-Pricing: 3 yuan.