Happy event in daily jokes

Happy moments in everyday jokes. In life, there are many funny jokes, and some may like to talk about the jokes around them. Now it is also a very hot topic. So, what are the happy moments in daily jokes? Let's take a look together.

Happy event 1

First, those who look good and like to eat are called foodies, and those who look ugly and like to eat are called gits!

Second, it is said that men have gold under their knees. I quickly scraped off the skin and didn't even find a piece of iron!

Third, in ancient times, pharmacies would hang a couplet: I hope everyone in the world will not get sick, and I would rather put the medicine on the shelf to produce dust; Now pharmacies hang a big banner: People who buy medicine in 38 yuan give away a catty of eggs.

4. I wore a leopard coat to go out in the morning. A couple walked past me with her children. Her child pointed at me and shouted, Mom, look, Tigress!

I have a buddy who said to his daughter-in-law, "Daughter-in-law, I have a fortune teller. The fortune teller said that I 135 years old has a hurdle! " His daughter-in-law said coldly, "What, the grave has been dug?"

6. The son is disobedient, and the husband beats his son there. I stopped him and advised him. My husband said, "Don't stop me. If you don't teach him today, you won't be able to manage it later. " Who knows, the son said indignantly, "You are not a good person if you don't even listen to your wife. Why should I listen to you? "

7. What is friendship? I changed my mobile phone number four times after graduation, but no one told me, but my classmates still contacted me when they got married!

Eight, compare your grades when you are a child, and compare your salary when you grow up. Now you have to compare your steps when you walk. Leave me alone, I just want to be an undisputed garbage, but I really did it before I found out that even garbage should be classified!

Nine, my wife made a dynamic in the circle of friends: keep exercising, 30,000 steps a day, great. In order not to be exposed, let me take her mobile phone to run every night, and I won't come back if I don't meet the standard.

I finally know why people choose a good day for marriage, because there may be no good days after marriage.

A happy moment in daquan 2 1 Recently, I feel that my memory has dropped badly, so I found a notebook to write down the important things every day.

But when I got up this morning, I almost moved the bed, but I couldn't find my notebook. .....

In Chinese class, the teacher asked the students to make sentences with "loudly", "quietly" and "silently" according to the model essay.

Xiaohua was the first to raise his hand: "Whenever my mother loudly scolds my grandfather, my grandfather always whispers," Yes. . . Yes . . And my father always sits on the sofa and reads the newspaper silently. "

Students interviewed for a big company, and two people were admitted, but dozens of people signed up.

The exam question is: let the examiner remember himself in the shortest time.

My classmate gave the examiner a mouth without saying a word and turned and ran away.

Tell him to go to work the next day. He thought for a long time. . . Or give up.

Happy moment 3 1, an 85-year-old woman married a 25-year-old boy, and the next day, the boy died, resulting in food poisoning. (ate expired milk)

The farmer slept naked in the orchard and was awakened by laughter. It turned out to be a monkey standing in front of him, laughing wildly. The farmer asked inexplicably, what are you laughing at? The monkey said: after eating fruit all my life, I saw bananas and walnuts grow together for the first time.

When the hunter was hunting, he saw two birds in the tree. He raised his gun and shot down a bird. He found it hairless, and he wondered. The other flew down and cursed: Shit, I just coaxed her to take off her clothes, and you killed her.

4. A poor village gave a subsidy, and an old man asked: What kind of money is this? The village chief said: it is a one-time living allowance. The old man was surprised and left with the money. The next day, the old man bent down to help the wall to find the village head. I want three sex subsidies today.

5, leading the family banquet, sister-in-law helped to serve, a guest bet: you touch sister-in-law's milk, I drink a glass of wine, as a result, both sides fulfilled their promises, but I didn't expect sister-in-law to say: brother-in-law, don't let go, drink him to death.

6. A lady asked the priest, What are hell and heaven? The priest explained: between my legs is the devil, and between your legs is hell. As long as you send the devil to hell, we can all go to heaven.

7. Someone went into a bookstore and asked the female boss if she had Autumn by Ba Jin. The female boss didn't look up and said, are you kidding? This is a bookstore. We don't buy balls. Besides, it's not that big. It is rare to have a catty, but there are eight catties.